Miscellaneous: Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk....

By ironic driver - 04/09/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 567

You deserved it 4 614

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/03/2012 07:33 - United States

Today, I got pulled over for drunk driving. This is the second time its happened. I was completely sober both times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 424

You deserved it 16 521

By Anonymous - 25/08/2011 06:49 - United States

Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 146

You deserved it 3 487

By Anonymous - 18/05/2009 06:45 - Canada

Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 992

You deserved it 24 005

By drewig - 10/05/2010 05:28 - United States

Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 149

You deserved it 53 593

No good deed…

By SCdriver - 16/07/2012 06:04 - United States - Lexington

Today, I called the cops to let them know that a drunk man was driving dangerously down my road. About an hour later, I was going to the store and got pulled over for speeding by the cop I called. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 234

You deserved it 36 245

By DWIcop - 03/04/2019 00:00

Today, while leaving our county courthouse after testifying as the arresting officer in multiple DWI cases, I hit a wrong way sign in the court’s parking lot. All the defense attorneys were outside, asking me if I was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 770

You deserved it 821

By notdrivinganytimesoon - 04/03/2015 02:35 - United States - Richardson

Today, I got pulled over during my driving test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 270

You deserved it 7 694

By Jesse - 20/03/2009 05:48 - United States

Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 946

You deserved it 151 294

By airborne - 06/05/2009 01:11 - United States

Today, I saw someone drive recklessly as if they were drunk. When I called the cops, I got pulled over by another cop for talking on my cell phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 165

You deserved it 17 611

By driverman12 - 04/04/2009 19:42 - United States

Today, I was driving on the freeway when I saw a car in front of me swerving across 3 lanes of traffic. Thinking he might be drunk, I dialed 911 on my phone, but I dropped it. I fished under my seat to get it, swerving, and got pulled over by highway patrol and given a field sobriety test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 178

You deserved it 31 000

marinus_fml 19

Monday 5 September 2011 8:50

I think you were drunk...calling it DWI??

StoryOfTheYear 14

Monday 5 September 2011 8:51

Maybe the line "I swear to drunk officer, I'm not God!" will actually work in this situation.

Comments

DrumsLoveMe 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 6:53

I'm calling bullshit and calling this a lie

dontstealmyshoes 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 7:25

Idiot post

fallout125 2

Tuesday 6 September 2011 7:26

I wish this was like facebook "LIKE"

sameer3 1

Tuesday 6 September 2011 7:35

reminds me of super troopers xD

aFMLfann4life 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 7:43

It takes a drunk to know a drunk ;)

irideiconzx14 4

Tuesday 6 September 2011 9:17

first off a DWI is "Driving While Intoxicated" just a different term of DUI and no way a cop was drunk I call BS.......

hanzyb 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 17:05

ANOTHER FAKE FML!

ilovemygomez101 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 19:45

That's made up!

tcreddevil11 6

Tuesday 6 September 2011 20:16

That's Texas for you

dev71893 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 21:36

#2. DUI: driving under the influence DWI: driving while intoxicated its the same thing.....

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Today, my girlfriend, who used to have the sex drive of a rabbit on Viagra, has recently lost all interest. It turns out that because her dad finally approves of me, she’s no longer interested in me. Apparently she only lusted after me when her dad didn’t like me, so now I’m of no interest to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 643

You deserved it 122

Today, my roommate drew a giant red penis and scrotum on our refrigerator, using what he thought was a dry erase marker. It was a permanent marker. I just renewed my lease. I get to look at a red penis every day for the next year and a half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 244

You deserved it 5 157

The Top

Today, I was so tired this morning when I went to take a dump and instead of using a baby wipe, I used a Lysol wipe. Guess I don’t have Covid up my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 697

You deserved it 378

Today, I threw a bonfire for my birthday. My boyfriend managed to set my leg on fire by throwing his liquor bottle into the fire. Happy birthday to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 291

You deserved it 2 731

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 045

You deserved it 8 604

Today, my house was broken into. How? My mom left a key under a flower pot on the porch. She also left a note on the door saying so. He stole all of my guitars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 535

You deserved it 2 749

Today, my mom sold our electronic stuff to pay for hurricane shutters. We live in Chicago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 735

You deserved it 2 972

Today, I told my boyfriend he needed to wash his sheets more often after I discovered the same wet spot from the last time I slept over. He shrugged and said, “What’s the big deal babe? It’s your spot.” It’s been over two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783

You deserved it 173

Same thing different taste

No good deed…

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