Love: Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his...

By anonmys - 18/07/2010 21:47 - United States

Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his lips at me. Flattered, I gave him my number when the train stopped. He looked at me and said, "Don't flatter yourself. You have mustard on your face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 460

You deserved it 19 430

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 15/11/2013 09:45 - United Kingdom - Bicester

Today, I made eye contact with a cute guy from across a packed train. He then yelled out, in front of everyone, "You've got foam on your nose!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 419

You deserved it 4 043

By fmylifebad - 29/04/2009 10:12 - United States

Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 144

You deserved it 12 192

Self sabotage

By Anonymous - 15/08/2012 17:41 - United States

Today, I was drawing while on the train, when a very good-looking woman looked at my work and said, "Wow, she's pretty. Is it supposed to be me?" She'd said it in a flirty tone, but before I could stop myself, I'd said, "Nah, it's just a generic face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 485

You deserved it 10 803

By Anonymous - 26/12/2009 05:16 - United States

Today, I was riding the train home, and I sat in the row in front of a homeless woman. I noticed an old man staring at me. I got off the train after a long 6 stops, and the old man who had been staring at me walks up to me and says "The lady behind you was flicking lice onto you the whole time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 856

You deserved it 2 604

By Kamburgler - 02/07/2011 06:33 - United States

Today, this really cute guy at work kept flirting with me and cracking the funniest jokes. Before he left, he told me how much he enjoyed making me smile. An hour later, I saw my reflection in a mirror, I had a huge piece of food stuck in my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 389

You deserved it 5 724

Powerful

By Noguestlist - 02/03/2011 08:16

Today, on the train, a cute girl gave me her number. After maybe half an hour, she went to her seat and I went to the toilet for a quick but loud and painful dump. I opened the door and saw her outside getting bitch-slapped by the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 568

You deserved it 9 952

By touched - 10/02/2009 11:30 - Philippines

Today, on the crowded train, a cute guy called me over and told me to stand next to him because there were less people there. We started talking, but he left before I could get his number. Just when I was about to tell my friends about it, I find out that he stole my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 398

You deserved it 5 708

By ilovecowboys - 26/02/2010 09:09 - New Zealand

Today, on the train to work, the train guard was hot and I became stupidly nervous. I'm very shy and was trying to avoid eye-contact. He said 'THANK YOU', in a pissed off tone of voice and glared at me. I had absent-mindedly been staring in the direction of his prosthetic arm the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 879

You deserved it 7 047

By Anonymous - 06/07/2013 11:26 - United States

Today, while out for lunch, a guy approached me and asked for my number. I politely declined. To my dismay, he dropped to his knees, grabbed his head, and started moaning about how nobody ever gives him a chance. I felt the accusing stares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 731

You deserved it 6 802

By needanewride - 16/11/2012 02:40 - United States - Newton Center

Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 299

You deserved it 3 316

aKa_Bub0nic 0

Monday 19 July 2010 1:30

Time for you to ketchup with the times and realize nobody licks their lips anymore to show signs of affection.

Kirashai 9

Monday 19 July 2010 1:30

...Yeah, he could've just tapped your shoulder and told you like a normal person.

Comments

omega802 0

Monday 19 July 2010 2:21

lol he's hungry or has a food fetish

rebbee 0

Monday 19 July 2010 2:22

YDI for having tickets on yourself.

NerdyDinoLover 0

Monday 19 July 2010 2:24

ORLY? Dam that sukz

barbarajean 0

Monday 19 July 2010 2:28

Omg I hate guys like that.

selenagirl_fml 0

Monday 19 July 2010 2:28

wow... I'm speechless

5t3ff1k4h 44

Monday 19 July 2010 2:35

Good.

Generalx3 0

Monday 19 July 2010 2:47

ahaha.

selenagirl_fml 0

Monday 19 July 2010 4:33

omfg! it's my #1 hater!!! how's it going!? terrible? I sure hope so!

5t3ff1k4h 44

Monday 19 July 2010 5:10

In case you aren't smart enough to figure this out, I comment only where I see fit. I don't go following your comments, What I wanted to post happened to be right under your pointless comment. Try not to let your head explode, huh?

LightningLadyy 0

Monday 19 July 2010 11:45

Hahahaha I love 177 :D ****** sweet

selenagirl_fml 0

Monday 19 July 2010 20:51

^^^says the one with Justin bieber and Robert pattison posters

selenagirl_fml 0

Monday 19 July 2010 20:55

anyways I don't want to insult or offend anyone so forget the whole thing. it's better if we all stay out of everyone's way.

5t3ff1k4h 44

Tuesday 20 July 2010 23:03

Awe, Selenagirl, just because she likes Twilight and Justin Bieber doesn't mean her opinion isn't valid. You're just jealous because no one's complimented you.