By anonymous - 14/03/2012 05:18 - Canada

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 059
You deserved it 14 185
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Top comments

pinkcrayola 0

You're the one who picked him.

194 8
jellyD 1

Best reason ever to dump the, pardon me please!, asshole!!!

140 17

Comments

GothicAngel17 24

OP's gonna get pink eye. Seriously though, that's disgusting. I would have punched him in the balls.

27 1
102Percent 5

In his boyish mind hes just telling you he loves you.

12 0
amoscore 5

Can it compare to Steve-O's reaction when they gave it to him Jackass 2?

6 1
Phil135 4

Damn, don't people know this is how you get pink eye? SMH -_-

8 0
girl112891 7

You need to get a serious message through if you're marrying the guy. Really! Sitting on your face alone is bad enough!

6 0
gators1995 30

What can I say?? Adults are responsible and immature

0 4
jellyD 1

Best reason ever to dump the, pardon me please!, asshole!!!

140 17
thiscrazything 1

Yeah, otherwise, good luck with a lifetime of bliss with that one.

20 3
mrmerino 0

Mein Gott, nobody cares if you swear in the Internet!

7 11
Michaelsgirl04 9

64: I think the "pardon me please" was for the possible pun in the word "asshole" since this fml is about farts. I could be wrong though.

28 0
sezual 15

I'm not sure if that alone is enough reason to end an engagement, you did say 'yes' for a reason. Although, if the reasons you said yes don't outweigh this situation then you definitely have some thinking to do. It also bothers me when someone says 'and I'm marrying this man' and it's not implied as a good thing. Speak to him about it, I know it's hard to change habits but I'm sure farting in people's faces isn't a personal trait that he holds dear. If it is, run as fast as you can.

25 1
pinkcrayola 0

You're the one who picked him.

194 8
mattorama 15

Seriously, is this an arranged marriage or something?

11 1
firefighterjohn 9

I've done that to my girlfriend but she was tied up and couldn't do anything about it muuhahaha

24 82
Crazberry 5

And this, ladies, is why the man should be tied up instead of you :P

57 0
ladyLALAA 28

If my man were to do that to me I would really lose my cool. Vile!

27 3
MetalxSoldier 26

Wow, I bet all her friends are jealous! Not!

16 2
Colonel_Lexi 18

That must have been pretty embarASSing.

28 62
shizzathon 5

Oh guys, lighten up, that's hilarious. What's a relationship without a bit of slagging and fun?

73 41
THE_A_TEEN 27

If sitting on your fiancé's face and violently farting is considered fun to you, then your chances of being with a girl is very slim.

58 4
THE_A_TEEN 27

*with anybody Childlike play is fun, but that's crossing the line...

36 3
DjeePee 24

Hilarious? I'm afraid we two have a complete different view on humor, pal. To be honest, I think this is more humiliating and disturbing and totally-not-acceptable-from-your-beloved-partner than hilarious.

39 6
Azula272 14

But you come prepared. Gas Mask & all XD

36 1
RedPillSucks 31

DjeePee, was this your FML?

12 1
asiandude801 4

And that's why she has a gas mask at all times

7 0
shizzathon 5

I'm a girl, actually, and have been in a blissful, committed, yet incredibly fun relationship for the past nine months. :)

1 5
peachesncreem 21

True love isn't just blind, it also has no sense of smell.

68 3