Health: Today, I went to the physician to check my rear because it was...

By Joel_28 - 01/03/2010 00:33 - Canada

Today, I went to the physician to check my rear because it was hurting. My usual doctor wasn't available, so he was replaced by a gorgeous woman with big cleavage. when she asked me to pull down my pants, she saw that I had a huge hard on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 505

You deserved it 20 698

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Same thing different taste

Gender bending

By Anonymous - 03/09/2021 16:59

Today, my doctor told me to take off my pants so she could do a checkup. When I took them off, she gasped. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was expecting something else. She thought I was a dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 201

Volcanic eruption

By Anonymous - 10/01/2020 18:00

Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 358

You deserved it 978

By Anonymous - 23/07/2010 00:39 - United Kingdom

I agree, your life sucks 40 870

You deserved it 16 882

By manlyman - 05/04/2009 13:32 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I are having some fertility problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said, "Mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 309

You deserved it 5 309

Fingered

By Anonymous - 03/07/2023 19:00 - Finland - Tampere

Today, I went to see a doctor because of some blood in my stool. Not only is the matter embarrassing enough as is, it turned out the doctor was a young, crisply dressed, extremely handsome man. I then had his finger in my ass for a check-up, all the while him being very nice about it. I'm still mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 215

By ERnightmare - 02/08/2018 21:00 - United States - Long Beach

Today, I was lucky to have an extremely attractive doctor operating on me. This would have been great had he not been removing a foreign object from my vagina after an ill-fated masturbation session. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 115

You deserved it 4 267

Prostate implies an Antistate

By artsmart1 - 06/03/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 411

You deserved it 2 947

By jons - 17/02/2009 21:54 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor for my yearly checkup. After getting my blood-pressure taken, my finger pricked, etc, the doctor began to ask me some questions. When asked if I was sexually active, I responded "Yes". The doctor started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 518

You deserved it 3 608

By sad child - 27/08/2011 07:45 - United States

Today, I went to my doctor for a check-up. It started with the doctor lifting my shirt up to check my heartbeat, and ended with my gran starting a fistfight over his "perverted ways." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 759

You deserved it 2 704

By WTFFAIL - 03/12/2012 05:06 - Canada - Montreal

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 576

You deserved it 9 006

skiier4life 1

Monday 1 March 2010 5:29

he's a douche because he couldn't contol an uncontrollable function?

kyonichii 4

Monday 1 March 2010 5:27

Jeez, I hope her hands weren't cold.

Comments

x2Sypher2x 0

Monday 1 March 2010 6:24

McLol

bolingtexas 0

Monday 1 March 2010 6:28

if she was impressed then it shouldn't matter

Fedor_is_KING 0

Monday 1 March 2010 6:32

It's only an FML if you didn't wink and say, "So, you wanna?"

hapylordofdeath9 0

Monday 1 March 2010 6:32

well if she's a hot doctor replacement, I'm site she gets that aaaaallllllllllllllllll the time

Kamens 0

Monday 1 March 2010 6:32

YDI for living in Texas.

jugger 0

Monday 1 March 2010 6:40

watever. I call fake.

adog5 0

Monday 1 March 2010 6:42

dude did u **** in your pants

timk_fml 2

Monday 1 March 2010 6:42

did you still have the hardon when she don the latex gloves and said bend over?

mrguy266 0

Monday 1 March 2010 6:44

Hahahaha @34

simpledrunkdude 4

Monday 1 March 2010 6:51

niice

Keywords

Love Christmas Break-ups Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Cute Haircut Relatable Work You're fired Cars Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Sex Roommate Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 784

You deserved it 22 714

Today, I took my 8 year-old daughter to an airplane museum to show her the kinds of aircraft I’ve worked on during my 30+ year career. In the first 15 minutes, I had grease on my new shirt, bumped my head, spilled coffee and cut my hand. Sums up my career. Only 10 more years to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 471

You deserved it 237

The Top

Today, I was called a wimp for getting a sunburn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 681

You deserved it 150

Today, I was posted with a very lonely gate-guard. From the second I arrived, I had to listen to him drone on and on, and now I know his entire life story. I was there for four hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 238

You deserved it 4 153

Today, I work at the DMV. My ex-husband’s sister came in for a last name change. When I looked at the marriage license and her other documents, it was revealed that she was never his sister. My ex-husband is now her husband. Now I understand why they always spent time alone together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 066

You deserved it 126

Today, I got my science test back. I thought I did a horrible job on it, but only three were circled. I was happy but doubtful that I did so well, so I asked my teacher just to make sure. He said it was faster to circle the correct answers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 635

You deserved it 29 610

Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 073

You deserved it 3 223

Today, in a train, I did the old "I've got your nose" trick for a kid. He got off at the next stop, then waved something at me from the platform, then yelled, "I've got your keys!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 142

Same thing different taste

Gender bending

Volcanic eruption

Fingered

Prostate implies an Antistate

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