Kids: Today, I woke up to my 8 month old son happy as can be. I could...

By WOCOACH - 09/09/2009 19:33 - United States

Today, I woke up to my 8 month old son happy as can be. I could hear him laughing over the monitor. When I walked into the room, he had somehow got his diaper off and was holding onto his new found penis. He thought it was hysterical when it went off and shot urine everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 900

You deserved it 5 044

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Same thing different taste

Training day

By Anonymous - 09/11/2011 21:52 - United States

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML

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By Anonymous - 16/06/2009 07:03 - United States

Today, my toddler peed in his potty for the first time. He was so excited to show me that he flung the pot in the air dousing my face with his piss. Then he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 547

You deserved it 5 212

So sweet

By Aislinn - 12/02/2022 12:01

Today, my one year-old took his diaper off and peed on my chest while I was sleeping. FML

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You deserved it 196

I just can't hide it

By doomeddaddy - 03/08/2011 16:46 - United States

Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML

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You deserved it 3 234

Not now, Sweetie

By Redbeard - 24/01/2020 05:00

Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 188

You deserved it 368

By KayyElOh94 - 17/10/2014 22:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 732

You deserved it 3 806

By Bonding_boys - 17/12/2012 16:21 - United States - Elk River

Today, I came home to find my husband and our 4-year-old son simultaneously peeing off the second-floor balcony. My husband was giggling like a little girl. FML

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You deserved it 6 281

By TiredMommy - 20/04/2017 18:00 - United States - Southbridge

Today, my 2-year-old son figured out that if he takes his pull-up off and DOESN'T go on the potty, he can pee all over things. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 570

You deserved it 518

Little bundles of joy

By SD. - 15/05/2021 16:06 - United States - Essex Junction

Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 173

By finalyearsofhate - 13/03/2017 22:00

Today, my son took a nap quietly for the first time ever. As I went to wake him up, I realized why. A previously poop-filled diaper came flying at me when I opened the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 300

You deserved it 561

allmidnighteyes 10

Thursday 10 September 2009 1:16

Oh, how it shot from his member like a geyser from the earth Covering the room with the bittersweet aroma of piss The drip on the walls, it running down his balls Oh the majestic beauty, splendor precipitating

Florg 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 1:11

lol he painted the room yellow, a perfect baby color.

Comments

LALALALagirrl 1

Thursday 10 September 2009 2:25

LMAAAOO, ahh that made me smile:) funny kid, lol

xNatsuki 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 2:26

Well at least it's a good story to tell to your future daughter in law.

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Tuesday 31 March 2015 13:53

Oh god no.

jonny2x4 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 2:37

He's practicing to become a fireman.

Rakayum 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 2:43

it IS pretty funny now that i think about it.

xx_cole 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 2:47

... and? He's a baby. Although it does kind of suck, it shouldn't be that surprising.

albinoninja 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 2:57

this is utterly ****** hilarious!

Melisaaaa 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 3:03

Why The Hell Is This An FML?! Are you kidding me with this shit? My son is 2 and has been fascinated with his penis since he was 6 months old. And He STILL Loves To Watch Himself Pee. Just wait till you wipe him when you change his diaper and he laughs hysterically because it feels good. The people that modded this obviously have never been around a baby boy.

Monado 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 3:17

Well you may find baby urine cute, but the rest of us do not. Espically when it's all over the room.

nypd613 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 3:17

I had a similar fml but it got moderated out :(. only I was changing my nephew's diaper while it happened and it got all over me! I was so startled and grossed out that I shouted "****!" and he found that so funny he started giggling. he laughed harder every time I said over and over "****!" while I ran to get towels.