Transportation: Today, I wound up cleaning vomit out of the window track of my...

By dee - 10/12/2011 10:14 - United States

Today, I wound up cleaning vomit out of the window track of my car at midnight, in the nicest dress I own, after my husband got completely wasted at his office Christmas party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 801

You deserved it 3 321

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By sma93 - 17/12/2016 18:30 - United States - Baldwin

Today, after my work's Christmas party, everyone got so drunk that I had to help one of my only sober co-workers take everyone home and clean up vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 720

You deserved it 587

By hnickell93 - 09/10/2012 01:55 - United States - Visalia

Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 743

You deserved it 5 406

By IfuSeekAmyIdo - 05/04/2009 21:34 - United States

Today, I hired a babysitter, so my husband and I could spend some time together and work on our failing marriage. I dressed up. We went out. He got drunk and puked on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 714

You deserved it 7 380

Party hard

By Coldflame - 06/03/2010 15:22 - United States

Today, I was designated driver for my friends. This entailed standing around in the cold for 3 hours, not drinking, dealing with drunk people, and oh yeah, I almost forgot, cleaning up vomit from my hair, my clothes, and my new car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 136

You deserved it 7 527

By Anonymous - 24/04/2014 15:35 - United Kingdom - Montrose

Today, I got my car cleaned. As I drove home, the passenger of the van in front of me vomited out the window. The vomit sailed back and splattered all over the front of my car. A waste of £10 and a mental image that will never go away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 235

You deserved it 3 417

By shwasted - 22/02/2010 05:17 - United States

Today, I had one of the worst first dates of my life. After leaving the restaurant early, we went to a party to try and salvage the night. My date then got wasted, ended up puking in the back seat of my car on the way home, then lied about it. My night ended with me cleaning vomit out of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 556

You deserved it 3 797

By eggnoodles - 13/12/2009 05:44 - United States

Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 007

You deserved it 53 185

By Anonymous - 04/07/2009 20:21 - United States

Today, after spending two days cleaning my car inside and out, I had to pick up my brother when his truck died in the mountains, on a dirt road. He was drunk. I now have a car covered in mud and filled with vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 442

You deserved it 3 144

By Anonymous - 20/12/2013 22:00 - United Kingdom - Romford

Today, a man wearing a Santa hat stumbled out of a bar, staggered over to my car, and vomited through the open window into my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 844

You deserved it 4 229

PANIC!

By big time traumatized - 02/11/2022 10:00

Today, my husband drank way too much white wine at a wedding and projectile vomited all over me and my car while I was driving. We were 5 miles from home and I have emetophobia (the fear of vomit/vomiting). FML

I agree, your life sucks 838

You deserved it 179

rexgar2000 10

Saturday 10 December 2011 15:57

sounds like he had a great time. could've worse at least he didn't throw up on your dress.

Draxanoth 15

Saturday 10 December 2011 15:59

Merry Chri-(insert barfing noise here)

Comments

Wheredidgrungego 12

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:20

Happy Holidays!

stevenmx86 7

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:22

19, how stupid can you be? "til death do US part".. OP, that's awful. I hope, for your sake, that he still has a job on Monday..

uKNOuLOVEit 0

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:24

Love will make you do crazy things.

boredblonde 17

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:25

Teach that asshole a lesson!

KYLAisaBITCH 4

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:28

You should have changed out of the dress.

Lowie18 0

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:31

Give your husband a hi-five for me!!!

ChrisTheCalm 9

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:35

Greatest time of the year (:

Random_ChickXD 0

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:41

To much eggnog? D:

loserman67 35

Saturday 10 December 2011 17:06

Does he still have a job? Usually stories like that include the guy telling his boss to **** off or if his boss is female telling her how much he wants her to kneel under his desk to give him a ********. Ahhhhh, the holidays are so wonderful. Enjoy your cocktail weiner, booze and cheese smelling car each and everytime you turn on the heater! Merry Christmas!