Miscellaneous: Today, in the spirit of Christmas, I let a spider live in my...

By Anonymous - 28/12/2011 17:03 - United Kingdom

Today, in the spirit of Christmas, I let a spider live in my room. I normally kill them, because I'm scared of waking up with one on my face. I woke up with it on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 850

You deserved it 23 599

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By dre_bro11 - 06/11/2011 12:17 - Australia

Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 064

You deserved it 12 473

By Shrieking_Shack_Maiden - 07/09/2018 23:30

Today, I got to experience the unadulterated horror of waking up to a spider crawling across my face. My screaming woke the neighbors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 666

You deserved it 261

Juicy breakfast

By Anonymous - 07/01/2022 01:01 - Canada - Warman

Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 050

You deserved it 160

Leave spiders to chill

By Anonymous - 17/12/2020 14:07

Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 731

You deserved it 323

Adapt, improvise, overcome

By Arthur B. - 24/09/2019 12:01

Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 352

You deserved it 463

By jillydark6609 - 19/09/2010 06:21 - United States

Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 287

You deserved it 14 263

Freak out

By Anonymous - 03/09/2020 19:07 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, some jackass spider decided to lay eggs behind my wall. No matter how many I kill, I always wake up to multiple baby spiders on my ceiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 395

You deserved it 126

By eyes wide SHIT - 28/12/2013 01:37 - Australia

Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 024

You deserved it 5 960

By igotpride - 09/12/2013 21:01 - United States

Today, I woke up and coughed up the spider I thought I'd killed last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 821

You deserved it 5 381

By somuchforthat - 19/02/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 704

You deserved it 2 518

puppypuncher 5

Wednesday 28 December 2011 22:22

He was just coming back to thank you for saving him. Now give spider bro a hug.

Glitterhinoceros 14

Wednesday 28 December 2011 22:23

Why wouldn't you just put it outside and not kill it, you didn't HAVE to let it live in your room.

Comments

hoonyer 17

Wednesday 28 December 2011 23:36

It was just trying to say thank you !!! :D

freckleface221 19

Wednesday 28 December 2011 23:39

It was giving you a hug! :D

KiddNYC1O 20

Wednesday 28 December 2011 23:41

The tiny ones with the long-ass legs are harmless.

missathegirlwond 19

Thursday 29 December 2011 1:41

Actually, they're highly venomous. Their mouths just can't open wide enough to bite humans. Trippy, eh?

KiddNYC1O 20

Thursday 29 December 2011 4:04

After all, rendering them harmless to humans.

xSorry_fml 10

Wednesday 28 December 2011 23:45

Better than your friends nuts on your face.

epic_fail45 0

Wednesday 28 December 2011 23:45

Aww that was nice of you! But I bet u won't do that again...

littledragon 3

Wednesday 28 December 2011 23:46

I have the same fear! But that hasn't happened to me... so far...

zander4310 5

Wednesday 28 December 2011 23:47

LOLOL

L_Lovegood 19

Wednesday 28 December 2011 23:50

Did it bring you a fresh cup of morning tea, too? Do not suffer a spider to live - at least not in your house.

farahg3 0

Wednesday 28 December 2011 23:55

Ur stupid

Kinney97 6

Thursday 29 December 2011 0:03

did he bite you? maybe you will turn into spiderman

PeeblesWiggins 0

Thursday 29 December 2011 5:41

No. The spider promptly wove a web that said, "Some human."

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