Miscellaneous: Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge."...

By purged - 08/06/2013 23:43 - United States - Mechanicsville

Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge." After the movie, I jokingly asked him that if the U.S. had such a purge in real life, would he participate, and who would he kill first. Without missing a beat, he said, "you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 067

You deserved it 8 647

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/02/2010 08:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he'd kill me before I got infected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 791

You deserved it 7 816

By Anonymous - 21/08/2015 19:02 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I overheard my husband telling his friend that he wished a zombie apocalypse would happen in real life, so he could take me out back and shoot me without having to worry about going to prison. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 566

You deserved it 2 628

Cancelled

By Anonymous - 27/11/2009 03:23 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie where a girl proposed to a guy. He said, "I would hate it if that happened to me, obviously I don't want to get married if I haven't proposed myself." I was planning on proposing later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 368

You deserved it 8 820

By kel - 08/11/2013 23:50 - United Kingdom - Coventry

Today, I was watching some episodes of The Walking Dead with my boyfriend, after recently introducing him to the series. A scene involving Carl came on, and my boyfriend said, "God damn. You ever give me a kid that annoying, I'll shoot both of ya right in the head." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 958

You deserved it 7 474

Good to know

By DeadScared - 19/09/2011 00:23 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 015

You deserved it 3 567

By Abendigo77 - 14/01/2013 04:49 - United States - Healdsburg

Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill either his cat or me, he'd kill me because he "would never kill an animal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 564

You deserved it 6 842

By Anonymous - 07/09/2016 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I called my boyfriend and asked if he wanted to come watch a movie. He seemed eager, until I said I needed the company because my period had started. He then went dead silent, waited a few seconds before starting to fake-snore, then hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 457

You deserved it 2 118

Foreshadowing

By Confused - 31/07/2022 12:00

Today, my boyfriend of four years, who has never been anything but loving and supportive, told me after I made a joke that there has been “a change” in how he deals with people, that he has been “purging,” and that I could be next because he “has needs too.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 266

By fmmmmlll - 12/06/2012 05:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend brought up the time he said he'd love me until the day he died. He continued by saying, "So, let's just pretend I died today." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 205

You deserved it 2 450

Bonkers

By Anonymous - 27/05/2024 08:00 - United States - Lafayette

Today, the cops had to be called while my boyfriend and I were hanging out with some friends of ours. It all started when one of them said that he would kill himself if I didn't "just end your fucking relationship already, and date me instead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 93

Rawr6591 21

Sunday 9 June 2013 10:03

That's a red flag

angelofsaturn 23

Sunday 9 June 2013 10:05

I'd sleep with a machete from now on.

Comments

Cazz91 21

Sunday 9 June 2013 11:05

Well isn't he charming.

doodieman 9

Sunday 9 June 2013 11:13

Don't even trip, you think he'd be with you if he wanted you dead?

Whatapuffchild 23

Sunday 9 June 2013 11:24

hes got a nice sense of humor..right?

eddieray313 4

Sunday 9 June 2013 11:27

Funny

kindlarry 7

Sunday 9 June 2013 12:10

C'mon. If this isn't a "you deserved it", what is?

Myo_fml 20

Sunday 9 June 2013 12:19

He's only serving his country under the declaration of the new founding fathers...

DJ_Lyons 15

Sunday 9 June 2013 13:06

Don't ask questions that you do not want the answers to.

omgomgomg_NO 13

Sunday 9 June 2013 13:42

Get. Out. Now.

SMHsohard 22

Sunday 9 June 2013 13:52

This is what happens when you go fishing for sympathy. Of course he was going to give you that answer. Personally, I think it was pretty funny, and probably the same answer I would give to that stupid question.

graphicstyle7 17

Sunday 9 June 2013 15:31

She wasn't "fishing for sympathy". She was just asking a question about the Purge. She never said "but you'll defend me to the death, right?" or any such crap like that. She was just asking about the MOVIE. Re-read what she posted, and stop being so snippy.

SMHsohard 22

Sunday 9 June 2013 19:19

Gee, someone ate big ol' helping of indignation this morning. Of course she was fishing, for something, be it sympathy, a compliment, hug, whatever. Now, knowing that The Purge is a MOVIE (your caps), I doubt this was a pivotal point in their relationship. It was, however, an "ask a silly question, get a silly answer" moment. And I'll say it again; I would have given the same answer to my husband; OP's boyfriend has great comedic timing.

MissyMiss5 13

Monday 10 June 2013 7:11

You're a dumbass for thinking she was "fishing" for anything. Have you ever heard of having a conversation with your spouse! If the purge was real I'd go after someone with power and help save the country :) for the greater good of course!