Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend texted me, and asked if he could come over...

By kylie - 10/08/2010 07:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend texted me, and asked if he could come over to 'have some fun'. Thinking we were going to do it, I freshened up. Turns out his idea of 'having some fun' is playing Doodle Jump and Angry Birds on my iPod. For three hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 445

You deserved it 9 353

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Rosie - 13/06/2012 16:07 - Germany - Wesel

Today, I woke up to the sight of my boyfriend playing a game on my iPhone with his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 385

You deserved it 5 246

Man City

By EpicBunBun - 10/05/2017 18:00

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, I thought he went to change the music on his phone. He'd actually stopped mid-action just to check sports scores. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 270

You deserved it 719

By Minecraftwhyyy - 22/08/2012 15:13 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 135

You deserved it 6 752

By Anonymous - 22/04/2013 20:16 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 036

You deserved it 8 452

By Anonymous - 19/02/2011 05:22 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 047

You deserved it 8 604

By -___- - 29/09/2013 19:46 - United States - Winfield

Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 783

You deserved it 27 696

So frustrating!

By Justawoman - 04/06/2014 15:52 - Denmark - Aarhus

Today, my boyfriend complained all day about being bored, so wanting to cheer him up, I put on some sexy clothes and went to his house. I got on his bed in my underwear and called him over. He quickly decided he'd rather play Diablo for the next five hours instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 579

You deserved it 8 638

By Unclicked - 01/08/2009 11:58 - Singapore

Today, my long-distance boyfriend wanted to spend time online with me. He kept quiet on Skype and went on a hundred different stupid websites, laughing by himself. Afterwards, he told me he really enjoyed our time together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 260

You deserved it 7 009

Plebs need not apply.

By chels - 17/07/2018 19:00

Today, when my new boyfriend told me he liked playing games, he meant a 60" TV with a professional gaming chair in the middle of his living room, and 48-hour gaming marathons where he totally ignores me, refuses to sleep or shower, and only has energy drinks and cheerios. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 899

You deserved it 871

By Jamie - 10/03/2010 20:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex when he stopped responding. Five minutes later and ready to hang up, he apologized because he got distracted with his game of Tetris. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 907

You deserved it 3 998

astarwarsfan 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:08

haha you got **** blocked by an iPod

perdix 29

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:11

You should have JUMPed him, whipped out his DOODLE, given him an ANGRY *******, flipped him the BIRD, and left. That would show him!

Comments

jjosies 1

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:23

I just moderated this :D

alexaddict08 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:24

those are amazing games

omgsmile 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:24

lmfaooo my boyfriend does the same thing i just take away my ipod

MiNdYRaWrZ 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:26

lol tht sux. but doodle jump and angry birds is so fun I'm like addicted haha XD

MrDrMe 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:26

This was a FAIL.

triggerit 5

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:27

these dumb-ass lovers...

LiLSumSum 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:27

cant blame him that game rocks lol

raininsnow 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:29

0__o those are fun games, but the only game I could possibly play for 3 hours is call of duty zombies. xD

gingersrule13 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:36

best two iPod games.

CitrusGirl 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 16:41

fyl got having a boyfriend who comes over just to play with your toys. aren't most people over that by age 10?

Keywords

Holidays Toxic Family Christmas Love Coworkers AITA Furniture Miscellaneous Parents Sex Intimacy Lonely Relatable Money Health Kids Television Roommate Amazon You're fired Work Cheating Computers Anger issues Mental health Dentist Painful I need your advice Am I overreacting?

The Top

Today, my parents told me that unless I think about my behaviour and make some real changes, people are going to think I’m weird or suspicious, and I’ll never make friends. This is because I choose to attend church on Sundays instead of watching TV and getting drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 283

Today, I'm exhausted and sore from a long night of pulling semis out of the snow. My wife is pissed because I want to sleep, instead of be with her. Every time I drift off, she starts doing things like loudly unloading the dishwasher or standing by our bedroom door talking loudly on the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 496

You deserved it 90

The Top

Today, I asked my friend, once again, to pay me back the $500 she owes me. She got annoyed and told me, “I told you, my Cash App locked me out of my account!” When I mentioned Venmo, she said she'd forgotten her password to it, called me a "selfish c*nt", and hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 361

You deserved it 214

Today, I already hate the holidays. My mom has been trying to be helpful, but has severe undiagnosed memory problems that our family ignores. They've also ignored all the house repairs, but have no problem consoling her while she cries how mean I am for missing her party, because I used my vacation time to fix the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 049

You deserved it 120

Today, I decided to get in the cowgirl position since it's my fiancé's favorite. I got a little carried away during the "ride" and suddenly heard his dick crack. I fractured his penis. He's never going to have sex with me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 557

You deserved it 948

Today, my kid's dad grumbled and complained about having to help me out buying clothes for him, because he was sure he just gave me money for clothes last year. I thought it would be fairly obvious that a 4 year-old would eventually need bigger clothes to accommodate the fact they are still growing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 159

Today, the guy I’ve been hanging out with and crushing on told me we now know each other well enough to be completely open with each other. I was excited, thinking our mild flirtations would finally go further. He just wanted me to know he’s gay, and asked me if I knew any single guys for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 937

You deserved it 193

Today, I went to a park and sat down next to this older lady. Some kids started fighting and screaming at each other, so I leaned next to her and said, "Man, am I glad those aren't MY kids." She turned to me and said, "Yeah, they're mine." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 464

You deserved it 33 047

Same thing different taste

Man City

So frustrating!

Plebs need not apply.

Top comments

Comments