Sex and Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna...

By Anonymous - 29/08/2012 16:38 - United States - Columbia

Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and learn about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 987

You deserved it 6 960

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Same thing different taste

By Pissy - 23/05/2019 06:05

Today, I thought my boyfriend wanted to be romantic by pouring a bath, getting in then calling me in. As I get comfortable, he stands up and gets out. At the same time, I notice yellow water. He'd pissed in the tub for a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 365

You deserved it 232

By Anonymous - 12/07/2010 23:15 - United States

Today, my boyfriend looked at me and suggestively told me to take a shower. He's leaving for two days so I humored him, thinking he wanted to do it in the shower. I waited for 20 minutes before he knocked on the door, telling me he needed to shower as well. He just wanted me to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 725

You deserved it 29 693

By DreeStahr - 30/09/2016 04:05 - United States - Liberty

Today, I was texting my boyfriend and things were getting a little steamy. He said, "I really want you right now." So, of course, I told him to come over. To which he replied, "Nah." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 906

You deserved it 1 389

By bathtime - 21/12/2011 04:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend started freaking out about how his penis floats in water. Baths with him will never be the same again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 941

You deserved it 4 210

By LonelyShowers - 04/07/2012 05:36 - United States - Mission Hills

Today, my boyfriend pointed out that the water bill is getting kind of high. I suggested that we shower together to save water. He said he'd rather deal with the high water bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 175

You deserved it 4 073

It's a witch!

By umm... - 30/03/2020 23:00 - Australia - Canberra

Today, I caught my boyfriend in the bathtub interrogating his penis and "drowning" it when it wouldn't answer him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 822

You deserved it 348

By BatBee - 03/08/2016 02:29 - United States - Princeton

Today, my husband and I were talking about how we missed our sexting from when we were dating, so later I took a bath and texted him while he was relaxing in bed. His response ? "I'm tired and hurry up I need to poop." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 364

You deserved it 1 521

By -___- - 29/09/2013 19:46 - United States - Winfield

Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 777

You deserved it 27 693

By sly - 25/10/2010 22:09 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to come over and surprise me. When he got to my apartment and heard the shower running, he decided get in and join me. I was walking my dog, my mother is in town for the weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 108

You deserved it 4 459

By that girl - 08/04/2014 23:06 - United States - Bessemer

Today, I was feeling horny, so I told my boyfriend, who lives 30 minutes away, that "I really needed him". He replied, "Did you fall in the toilet again?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 252

You deserved it 12 662

DragonzCreator 3

Wednesday 29 August 2012 22:51

It just goes to show, guys aren't always thinking about sex.

Psych101 9

Wednesday 29 August 2012 22:51

Hopefully you learned something. Both about water displacement and how literal your boyfriend is.

Comments

primitiveplus 8

Wednesday 29 August 2012 23:56

That would make a great pickup line! Just call me Archimedes.

Axipiter 24

Thursday 30 August 2012 4:04

Because you want to screw?

primitiveplus 8

Friday 31 August 2012 14:35

Actually, it's because I have a gold crown.

Axipiter 24

Thursday 30 August 2012 0:06

Again, how is this an FML? I mean, sure, you were probably expecting to have fun, and if you already knew about water displacement, yeah, then I get it. But if you didn't? "Oh no, FML, I'm LEARNING!"