Kids: Today, my girlfriend and I were outside tanning in the sun. I...

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By Anonymous - 08/04/2009 04:03 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were outside tanning in the sun. I asked her if she could put some sunscreen on my back. Thinking it would be funny, she used the lotion to write "I Love Little Boys". I work as a children's swimming instructor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 668

You deserved it 6 237

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Same thing different taste

Life's a beach

By Brittanyy_leigh - 17/12/2009 07:57 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 162

You deserved it 6 020

By Anonymous - 09/07/2013 16:07 - United States - Katy

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 755

You deserved it 23 100

By badcomparison - 18/12/2016 07:02 - United States - Warrensburg

Today, I was at Bath and Body Works with a friend of mine. She wanted me to smell a particular lotion and when she brought it up to my nose, she squeezed the bottle and lotion went all over my face. Right after, a worker came by and commented how the lotion "got a little too excited". FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 550

You deserved it 829

Fight me

By Anonymous - 08/12/2009 06:53 - United States

Today, I gave my sister some Lubriderm for a skin condition we share. While she was applying the lotion I joking said, "Wouldn't it be funny if it made it worse?" Guess who got punched in the face, twice, because it did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 764

You deserved it 25 587

By anonymous - 24/09/2011 15:22 - United States

Today, I was badly sunburnt even after making it a point to apply a lot of sunscreen. My coworkers thought it amusing to slap me every chance they get. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 406

You deserved it 4 719

By ilovedirt - 10/07/2011 03:12 - United States

Today, I was tanning by the pool. My friend put his arms under my back and knees and picked me up. He threw me across the kiddy pool to my boyfriend, shouting "Catch!" My boyfriend didn't catch me. Instead of a tan, I have a huge bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 324

You deserved it 3 774

By Geewizz - 05/04/2009 08:35 - United States

Today, I got a text from my girlfriend that she was tanning naked. I replied saying I wished I was there to make tanning more fun. She replied saying that its ok because Kevin was there. My girlfriend was tanning naked with another guy over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 490

You deserved it 4 717

By poopedon - 26/04/2009 03:10 - Canada

Today, I was at the beach and fell asleep in the sun. When I woke up, there was a blob of sunscreen on my leg. Thinking it was my boyfriend who was sweet enough to squeeze sunscreen for me, I rubbed it into my leg. After smelling my hands, I discovered it was bird poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 002

You deserved it 18 164

By humanshield - 10/04/2016 16:49 - United States - Rockland

Today, while working my job as a swim instructor, my coworker sprayed me with the hose. I instinctively held up what I was holding to block the cold water. I was holding a 4 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 265

You deserved it 5 149

Little perv

By cplaner - 04/02/2009 12:56 - United States

Today, I was teaching swim lessons. I got felt up by a 6 year-old boy. Three times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 767

You deserved it 5 241

Jaxro 6

Wednesday 8 April 2009 12:13

Your girlfriend must be made of pure win, that's hilarious. Just wear a shirt..

3ree 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 12:34

if its on your back, clearly you couldnt write it on yourself.

Comments

dcapp 0

Friday 10 April 2009 7:19

#12 is right how did you not feel that she was making lines on your back and not spreading the lotion around?????? this is fake

d3463 0

Friday 10 April 2009 16:57

Your gf is an idiot and has a sick sense of humor. More over, how did you not feel that she was writing something on your back? Are you unfamiliar with getting lotion put on your back? Unfamiliar with backrubs? Completely oblivious to the fact that the sensation of a fully lotioned back feels different that someone writing in lotion on your back? Have fun with you idiot girlfriend. Sounds like a prize... NOT!

dvineinfekt 0

Friday 10 April 2009 17:53

actually - to the guys who say you'd feel the writing...believe me. You can fake the motions with one hand, and write with the other, so long as your other hand is cool. Assuming they were at a beach or pool or something, it was perfectly reasonable. I think this is hilarious. But only cause its been done to me too...and this time its not me.

mutlis 0

Friday 10 April 2009 19:17

FAKE... sorry, but you'd know if someone was writing something on your back with sunscreen as opposed to rubbing it in

Omsok 0

Friday 10 April 2009 20:56

I suggest using Tiger Balm as lubricant. It is actually quite pleasurable for both, but the initial shock will scare her when you tell her this is payback. :)

rverboom 0

Sunday 12 April 2009 18:32

Wow you must be stupid if you didn't feel her WRITING on your back as opposed to RUBBING her hands in motion to rub the lotion on your back. Unless your body was NUMB.

rverboom 0

Sunday 12 April 2009 18:35

wow and to #87, im pretty sure it would take quite a bit of skill to lead to the girlfriend writing "I love little boys." I'd like to see you try it without the other person realizing. Stupid.

Tipsybeaver 0

Tuesday 14 April 2009 13:13

#29--Thank you for being the only intelligent person on here.

Realfaction 0

Friday 17 April 2009 1:01

Wouldn't you know if they were trying to write something on your back? It would take a while to write that out, and they would be using one finger to write it, not both hands smearing everywhere. Usually peeople just use both hands and rub it on your back.