Kids: Today, my niece told me to go and find my own friends. She's... - FML

By myheart75 - 07/08/2011 09:52 - Australia

Today, my niece told me to go and find my own friends. She's 2, and I'm 18. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 528

You deserved it 5 878

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Noname - 03/02/2009 20:25 - United States

Today, my 4 year old niece asked me why I didn't have a job or wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 736

You deserved it 7 802

Toxic people

By Armando de Carvalho - 10/10/2020 07:57

Today, I moved back with my mom, sister and niece after 10 years on my own. My niece is 11, we talked about life and she agrees my mom and my sister are toxic and that I should move out. She'll do it as soon as she's 18. I'm 29. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 110

You deserved it 196

By Anonymous - 02/06/2019 12:03

Today, I told my mom I was going swimming with friends. She told me, in front of them, not to go into the deep end unless there was an adult around because I'm not old enough to swim on my own. I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 981

You deserved it 203

My house, my rules

By Anonymous - 27/07/2022 00:01

Today, my daughter asked to go to a party and I said no, because I know some of the other people going and they're bad news. She then said she only asked permission as a courtesy, and is going anyway and just left. She lives with me but she did turn 18 last week, and I don’t know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 941

By Bear - 10/07/2017 04:30

Today, while picking up my 14-year-old sister, a friend of hers asked if I was her mother. I'm only 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 746

You deserved it 382

No introductions needed

By Anonymous - 18/02/2023 09:00 - United Kingdom - Bangor

Today, my younger half-sister discovered my existence. She then went to our grandparents' house, smashed my picture off their wall, and ransacked their house looking for other pictures of me to destroy. She's in her mid-twenties, behaving like a child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 106

I get around

By Anonymous - 27/04/2022 22:00 - United States - Boiling Springs

Today, I found out my 11 year-old's best friend, who is two months older than her, is also her sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 240

You deserved it 141

Sentenced

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Orlando

Today, I realized I can't wait until my daughter moves out the house when she is 18. She's eight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 256

You deserved it 29 294

Outta control

By brother - 21/05/2024 21:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I had to have a serious talk with my little sister about trying to hook up with my friends. Married or not. She just turned 18 but I’m hoping this was the first and last time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 82

Lonely boy hiding behind the front door

By Anonymous - 17/03/2022 06:00

Today, I learned that my parents know that I have no friends when they told me to go and make some. FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 156

Next

Top comments

sieera00 8

Sunday 7 August 2011 19:15

Owned by a two year old u should be ashamed :D

eminemchick 19

Sunday 7 August 2011 19:20

forever alone...

Comments

FLAMERSLAYER 5

Sunday 7 August 2011 22:40

maybe you should find your own friends

Fudgeblocks 2

Sunday 7 August 2011 22:47

Soon she will be the age where what ever you do is cool. And it's very annoying.

1twilight 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 22:48

why are you hanging out with 2 year old anyways.?

Simpson143 2

Monday 8 August 2011 0:53

Babysitting...?

KushTaeKush 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 22:50

Lol she just treated your life.

cheer4ever96 8

Sunday 7 August 2011 22:53

You got owned by a 2 year old! Lol get out more!

Bonghittinglover 3

Sunday 7 August 2011 22:59

Get a life..?

tj4234 35

Sunday 7 August 2011 23:09

Well I guess you just got the facts handed to you... go on out and find some friends son :), you're free now :).

Dorkee_Moi 11

Sunday 7 August 2011 23:19

this really made me laugh!!

perdix 29

Sunday 7 August 2011 23:29

She has every right to feel threatened. You could drive around her two-year-old friends and get them cigarettes, beer and into seeing R-rated movies. I'm sure a lot of two-year-old girls would like to have a friend like that.

SoSickWithIt 14

Sunday 7 August 2011 23:48

It's the little ones that never lie.

4
5
6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

TV shows Miscellaneous Coworkers Work Awkward Politics Relatable Transportation Ironic Embarrassing Instagram Social Media Shopping Parenting AITA Am I overreacting? Jealousy Love Kids Pranks Friends Dogs Housework Cars Technology Porn Sports Health Accident Mental health

The Top

Today, while on vacation with my siblings and the horde of nieces and nephews, me and hubby managed to sneak in a quickie. It was a quickie alright. For the first time in our marriage he blew his load after 2 strokes because he was afraid of being interrupted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 055

You deserved it 679

Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 443

You deserved it 3 015

The Top

Today, while serving a line of ten customers by myself at the coffee shop I work at, I knocked over a cup of steaming hot milk and it went all over the coffee bar, espresso machine, floor, and myself. I then had to act like everything was fine and make a line of drinks with milk everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 982

You deserved it 1 059

Today, I called my new boss by my old boss's name during a meeting. My new boss said nothing, but just glared at me in silence. Somehow, I think he wasn't impressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 606

You deserved it 239

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 178

You deserved it 12 525

Today, I told my father I'm going to a club with a friend and staying the night at my friend's place. He asked for my friend's name, number, and address so he knows where I'll be. I'm 30 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 526

You deserved it 6 560

Today, a close, funny friend who has quite the attitude, received a long email from a long-time friend of hers, telling her how difficult she is. When I told her it doesn’t matter, that she is still wonderful, she went off on how bad a friend I am for saying that, and then deleted me off WhatsApp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 426

You deserved it 222

Today, my boyfriend told me that I look better in different kinds of light. I asked him which kind of light I looked best in. His reply? "No light at all." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 263

You deserved it 6 808