Intimacy: Today, my wife left me the following voicemail: “Alex, last night...

By Barrel - 05/02/2009 07:57 - United States

Today, my wife left me the following voicemail: “Alex, last night was amazing. You took me to places I’ve never been to before. I can’t wait to see you tonight after work.” My name is Rob. We haven’t had sex in two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 794

You deserved it 9 051

Back to school
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Same thing different taste

Permission granted and rejected

By Anonymous - 28/09/2023 04:00

Today, my wife lost interest in sex a long time ago. I’ve tried to reignite her interest lately, which culminated in an argument where she gave me permission to go out and shag other women. We might as well divorce at this point if she’s going to say things like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 652

You deserved it 122

Busted

By Anonymous - 31/12/2008 23:41 - France

Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 902

You deserved it 2 850

By an unlucky man - 05/08/2016 09:37 - United States - Simi Valley

Today, my current wife left me for my ex-wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 015

You deserved it 3 107

By Anonymous - 15/05/2019 01:00

Today, my wife served me with divorce papers that included an accusation that I haven’t given her a decent orgasm since 1996. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 616

You deserved it 770

Last trip

By cap - 09/12/2019 01:00 - United States - Manhattan

Today, I had sex with my wife only to be told that the sex was horrible and to be given divorce papers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 252

You deserved it 322

Definitely maybe

By Anonymous - 05/06/2022 00:00

Today, my marriage is more or less over, as my wife is so career-obsessed that when I asked if we could spend some time together, she rolled her eyes and gave me permission to sleep with other women, since sex is all I think about. I didn’t ask for sex, just time together. Definitely over I think. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 875

You deserved it 186

Marriage doesn't solve anything

By Anonymous - 12/03/2021 17:00

Today, my wife told me how she really felt about me, and said she didn't love me anymore. We got married last month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 260

You deserved it 140

By TheLoneSoul - 13/09/2015 14:22 - France

Today, I received a call from my wife. It would've been great if she hadn't left on a business trip three years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 149

You deserved it 1 617

There must be other reasons

By Anonymous - 12/05/2022 00:01

Today, my wife is leaving me because I don’t satisfy her sexually. Chance would be a fine thing, every time I get romantic, all I get is, "I have a headache", "I think my period's coming", “Is sex all you think about?”, “What if the neighbours hear us?”, and my all time favourite, “Ew, not a chance.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 272

You deserved it 303

Pleased to see you too

By Anonymous - 13/05/2022 10:00 - United States

Today, my wife, who I haven’t seen for over a month because we both travel a lot for work, got home. The last thing she said to me was that she couldn't wait to get home because she just wants some alone time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 834

You deserved it 232

pezzlo 0

Tuesday 10 February 2009 0:45

Sorry, Rob. Alex

Dr_Phil 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 13:11

No sex in two years ... and you're still married, why?

Comments

paddyl888 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 17:59

get off your ass and bang your wife!

jsmith1199 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 20:57

this isnt your fault at all, despite what people are saying.. shes just a stupid *****

SamFromAccountin 0

Monday 23 March 2009 5:57

#19 +1 destroy the bitch

12mp04 0

Friday 27 March 2009 6:31

Two years without sex with your WIFE?!! >.>

kat0ria 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 18:56

LOL wow.... your wife...?

HRaeH 0

Monday 30 March 2009 0:02

Counselling or divorce. Your call. Good luck.

17Master 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 2:47

#12 is that for real? If so, then lolol.

blinkingstarlet 15

Monday 6 April 2009 8:15

22 is right, i smell bs.

dontcare804 0

Tuesday 14 April 2009 21:45

You should have figured out she was getting it from someone else if she went one year without wanting it. I am surprised you didn't divorce her long before. You should have at least had an affair too.