Health: Today, someone on Instagram posted a picture of himself with...

By athletiks - 26/03/2014 22:39 - United States - Pullman

Today, someone on Instagram posted a picture of himself with gym lifting straps around his neck. I commented "autoerotic asphyxiation" and now a 250-pound bodybuilder wants to kill me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 999

You deserved it 40 661

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Same thing different taste

By juggalomurderer59 - 12/11/2014 16:00 - United States

Today, at the gym, some muscle head idiot started yelling at the treadmill for not going fast enough, and I muttered "roid rage". Apparently said roids give him superhuman hearing, because he heard me from the other side of the room, and threatened to kill me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 793

You deserved it 9 537

The Rock

By Anonymous - 26/06/2022 22:00

Today, my bodybuilder boyfriend has been cheating on me, so I slapped him. He has such huge shoulder/neck muscle stuff, his head didn’t even move, and I dislocated 2 fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 592

You deserved it 1 006

By dontrapeme - 26/09/2012 10:30 - United States

Today, while at the gym, a very large man walked over to me and said, "I like wearing all orange to the gym." Not wanting to be rude, I asked why. He looks me up and down and said, "It reminds me of prison." I think I'm going to be jumped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 943

You deserved it 1 945

By fuckoffandfuckoffagainyoucunt - 17/08/2012 16:27 - United Kingdom - Sittingbourne

Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 606

You deserved it 2 770

Goof friends

By Headshotsgal - 22/04/2023 22:00

Today, I uploaded what I thought were beautiful selfies. One of my "friends" commented, "I've seen what your whole body looks like, so that's why you take only headshots. You're not fooling anybody, fatty." His comment got 18 likes. I took down the photos and spent the rest of my afternoon in tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 281

You deserved it 237

By not jacked - 20/04/2016 11:35 - United States - East Hartford

Today, my friend spotted for me while I was lifting a barbell. He thought it would be hilarious to tickle my armpits as I lifted it all the way up. I can still taste vomit in my mouth and it hurts to breathe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 167

You deserved it 1 560

Fight! Fight! Fight!

By Anonymous - 02/03/2016 17:54 - United States - Cedar Rapids

Today, some muscle-head showed up at my house and started beating on me. Turned out my son had been posing online as a Navy SEAL, using a picture of me, and had dared this guy to come over and fight him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 670

You deserved it 2 031

By desigymrat - 25/12/2010 05:29 - France

Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 509

You deserved it 42 601

I'm getting there!

By At least I'm trying - 26/08/2023 20:00

Today, one of my worst nightmares as an overweight woman came true. My boyfriend showed me a video someone had recorded of us exercising together, and who was mocking my weight the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 140

By cthulhu help me - 01/03/2013 18:22 - United States - Cabot

Today, my boss gave me the task of firing a recently-hired coworker next Friday. This guy spends most of his off-hours working out, probably abusing the fuck out of steroids, and to whom prison is like a bed-and-breakfast. I fear for my life by this point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 662

You deserved it 2 829

Awesomeaxel 24

Thursday 27 March 2014 7:24

Lesson to be learned. Don't be a dick

MisterEx 28

Thursday 27 March 2014 7:24

Don't talk the talk if you can't walk the walk keyboard warrior.

Comments

dmklake 14

Thursday 27 March 2014 19:24

i can imagine. i commented on someones outfit on instagram and one of her followers decided to follow me and #ewww my pictures. the net is such a fun place.

vlalam 24

Thursday 27 March 2014 19:46

Sorry, but that's totally hilarious.... Doesn't that guy have some sense of humor?

TheCrispyCat 20

Thursday 27 March 2014 20:24

Don't be on Instagram. The whole idea of it is stupid in my opinion.

Alastor13X 8

Thursday 27 March 2014 21:00

Just because they are body builders doesn't mean they have a big package. Ever heard of Little Man Syndrome? Yea, it's not vertical height that gives it to them. You throw in some steroids and you got a regular Crayola crayon with a couple of tic tacs. How do you think they wear those tights so comfortably? Mystery Solved...

otecasacid 22

Thursday 27 March 2014 21:16

and the size of the dick comes in where? also steroids don't shrink your dick, they turn your testicles off; which then condense in size until they are needed for testosterone production.

airportlad 4

Thursday 27 March 2014 21:04

Dont worry, the guy doesnt leave the gym, so you'll be fine

deletethedaleks 9

Thursday 27 March 2014 21:10

That's just freaking hilarious..

thecrazymancan 17

Thursday 27 March 2014 21:30

Just call the police.

hgore95 3

Thursday 27 March 2014 22:10

Roid rage at it's finest

DKjazz 20

Thursday 27 March 2014 22:48

I had a cat named Stupid. That was his name because he was a runt and had a habit of picking fights with other, larger cats. Stupid is gone now, but you may be Stupid incarnate.