By sosadbuttrue - 14/01/2012 13:15 - Switzerland

Spicy
Today, the quality of my sex life reached a new low. I faked my orgasm. And so did he. FML
I agree, your life sucks 19 180
You deserved it 27 958

Same thing different taste

Comments

Yeah that's bad, but not as bad as the lady that posted a while back about faking an ****** while masturbating.

Lmao! I must have missed that one! What the hell was the point of that if she was "double-clicking her mouse" alone? :)

What!? Lol that's awesome I can't even imagine that!!

I like to fart on cold windows and lick the condensation.

Lmfao yo my head hurts from how hard I was laughing at this lol

You both seem like really, really unintelligent people.

kickboxingchick 5

You must be dumb. That had absolutely nothing to do with... anything, really.

perdix 29

Game over, man! There are many complicated, mysterious reasons why women fake orgasms, but there is only one, simple one why a man would: sex with you is just not good enough. Start moving your shit out, the end is nigh.

maryam8869 7

Isn't that hard to say .. what if they were married ,?

perdix 29

It means that lawyers will be involved and it will be a hell of a lot more expensive. It is those money issues that keep men with women they can barely stand to **** anymore.

maryam8869 7

so if u got bored of ur wife u will leave her ,?

perdix 29

If I got SO bored that I'd want to give her a house and buy a lawyer a car, then yeah. With those disincentives, the level of boredom would have to be quite unbearable. Now, if there were a hot girl vying for my affections . . . ;)

maryam8869 7

:) look its unjust .. you might get bored but she still deeply in love with you.. i think theres tons of things to do to renewal your love .. check op's name

perdix 29

You'd be right that it would be unjust if she were passionate about sex, yet I was bored with it. If I'm bored because she's bored, then we are both probably better off moving on, don't you think?

maryam8869 7

yeah right .. why would she be bored if she was in love ..

If you break up because of the sex, you're: a) obviously not in love, b) a complete moron, and c) a sorry excuse for a human being That's just my opinion though.

No, women fake orgasms if the guy is just really bad in bed.

You need to stop using Lidocaine jelly as lube. What, too obscure?

perdix 29

Oh, I got it, Lidocaine is a topical anesthetic. I still don't know how that relates to topical humor, as in "The Daily Show." I can't see the connection between local numbing and Rick Santorum's sweater vests.

Through this stream of consciousness I just got a brief glimpse into the mind of Perdix. And it was horrifying.

perdix 29

You're telling me, Doc! You can always move on, but I have to live with this mind 24/7, and I literally mean 24 -- it works like this even when I sleep!

TheDrifter 23

Try a strong mix of Rohypnol, vicodin and gin. It works great on my dat... I mean I've heard it works.

I would've said vodka and Viagra to go along with ******!

And today will go down as a great day in FML history, a conversation between DocBastard and perdix...

117 - two of the greats, together as one!

Try thi he like foreplay and roleplay, I know alot of girls who are into the whole sadist and masochist thing, so try that and well, I wish you luck

ironyisforlosers 0

My icon used to be that of a normal smiling girl. Then I read this comment...

What? Both of you? Just stop trying.. If neither of you can get there, there can't be much sexual attraction.

No 1 should have to fake an ******, tell him what makes you feel good, ask what makes him feel good.

Yeah if none of you can enjoy it without faking, I'd just find someone else lol.