Intimacy: Today, the real estate guy came with potential buyers to visit... - FML

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By rmL - 13/10/2008 08:31

Spicy

Today, the real estate guy came with potential buyers to visit my house. He opened my bedroom while I was wanking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 006

You deserved it 41 599

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Same thing different taste

By visn - 17/06/2009 05:15 - United States

Today, a real estate agent showed my house to some buyers. I found out when I exited the shower, fully nude, to them in the hallway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 941

You deserved it 5 301

Hi there!

By anon - 26/07/2010 00:07 - Canada

Today, I was showing a house to a couple who were interested in buying. At least they "were" interested until they opened the blinds, looked out of the bedroom window and saw the neighbor on the toilet taking a dump. He was naked. He was hairy. He smiled and waved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 846

You deserved it 3 538

Why hello there...

By Shocked - 28/01/2018 19:00

Today, while looking at a house to buy, I opened a bathroom door. There was a naked man on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 702

You deserved it 435

By Anonymous - 19/10/2018 14:00

Today, I was in the middle of a wank when my home's back door, which is always locked, suddenly opened and someone walked in. I’m not sure who was more surprised: me or the new maintenance guy who saw me wanking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 339

You deserved it 644

Burglary [gone sexual]

By Anonymous - 01/12/2010 05:11 - United States

Spicy

Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 266

You deserved it 11 847

Offensive people work in TV? What a surprise!

By Anonymous - 18/05/2016 14:50 - United States - Frisco

Today, a TV crew filmed my house for a real estate show. They got an actor to pretend he owned the place but wanted to move. The host kept saying how shit my house is, and while talking about me with his producer, he said, "Know how I know he ain't a fag? Fags can actually decorate." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 948

You deserved it 1 187

Check this out

By Roger Quimble - 24/05/2019 00:04

Today, after taking a refreshing shower, I found out that due to a newly-built platform, people in the apartment underneath can see right into my bedroom. While I was standing there completely naked, some guy smiled at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 929

You deserved it 265

By Lewis - 04/09/2010 11:02 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I walked in the door and heard my husband calling me to the bedroom. I got a little excited, took my clothes off, and walked into the bedroom. I forgot our mortgagor was inspecting our house today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 258

You deserved it 34 505

Bad omen

By Anonymous - 10/10/2024 16:00 - United Kingdom - Bath

Today, I found out that my landlord had been showing my apartment to new tenants without telling me, when I woke up this morning to a family of four staring at me scratching my nuts whilst watching TV on my couch in my pajamas, horrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 62

Not good enough

By Ophelia - 08/06/2016 04:05 - United States - Hudson

Today, a realtor came to take a look at my house. I had worked all morning to make it look lovely. When they took pictures, I explained a number of ways I could change things so everything would look as good as possible. After the house tour, they told me it should be bulldozed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 893

You deserved it 1 075

Next

Top comments

ubbiejames 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 21:00

#5, the only person he knew that was coming was himself.

pommeblossom 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 3:34

Why would you do that if people were coming?

Comments

cwl727 32

Saturday 15 March 2014 19:11

Did you know he was coming?

cwl727 32

Saturday 15 March 2014 19:13

Didn't you hear them in your house?

kaoticroy 10

Sunday 6 July 2014 21:50

This was the first intimacy FML

Jyzlow 8

Tuesday 29 July 2014 23:03

What's the most sensitive part of your body when you're having a wank? Your ears, listening out for footsteps! You totally deserve it

nellyphant 18

Monday 4 May 2015 1:42

Your an idiot! A) you should have known they were coming, the owner has to have been given notice before people are shown round and b) you should have heard them in your house and stopped.

fantasyworld 37

Monday 18 May 2015 16:20

Did you not know that they were coming?

tin_cup 27

Tuesday 15 March 2016 7:42

Gross dude, just gross!

tofimixy 10

Thursday 12 May 2016 10:40

Wait doesn't he get paid?

whynot159 9

Thursday 12 May 2016 14:28

I've always heard people were very rude in Paris. One of my friends visiting Paris got spit on in the FACE by a taxi driver for not speaking good enough French. ?

burnanator 13

Thursday 12 May 2016 15:09

Different gravity in frenchie land. Don't even fret it. And the taxi thing? That's totally normal. They are all kinda rude, which is funny considering you pay them. I dunno. Good luck! My trip to france i got ONE taxi driver to take me somewhere. and i was there for a week xD (totally kidding about the gravity, but you'll leave feeling heavier)

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The Top

Today, I found out my mother had remarried, and that I was getting a stepfather and stepbrother. However, I found out about it 30 minutes before we left to pick them up from the airport, and also found out that I'm losing my bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 605

You deserved it 3 011

Today, I woke up to go pee and my cat followed me into the bathroom as usual. Then, in a not so usual fashion, she tried to jump from the sink to the top of the toilet, missed, and fell into the bowl while I was peeing. I'm scratched in a bad place, I have urine to clean up off the bathroom floor, and a traumatized cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 341

You deserved it 5 187

The Top

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 574

You deserved it 65 217

Today, I got a new job where one of my co-workers is someone I have been in love with for over 5 years now. She's married but my feelings for her just won't go away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 679

You deserved it 789

Today, my mom barged into my room at three in the morning, demanding to know where I'd been. I'd been in my room sleeping since ten o'clock. In that time she had called the police, all of my friends, and my ex-boyfriend, asking if I was with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 298

You deserved it 2 480

Today, at work, my boss made me spend a hour trying to catch a baby raccoon in the parking lot. I'm a bank teller. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 664

You deserved it 3 497

Today, my best friend was doing my hair. She got frustrated and exclaimed, "It won't stay!" I replied with, "Just like your mom!" It was then that I remembered her mom had just left her dad and moved out of the house to be with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 180

You deserved it 58 529

Today, after missing my flight and being stuck on the other side of the globe, I received a call telling me that the "male, neutered" kitten I adopted 7 months ago is now pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 475

You deserved it 1 409