Transportation: Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home,...

By nevergoingonabusagain - 30/05/2009 06:52 - Canada

Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home, which meant I had to stand. I noticed that a creepy guy sitting in front of me had a boner, so I took a few steps back. Suddenly the bus went through something like a speed bump, which caused me to fall and sit on the man's lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 264

You deserved it 5 713

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/05/2019 16:00

Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs and the next seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 714

You deserved it 224

By Justme - 30/06/2016 18:20 - United States - Missoula

Today, while I was riding the bus to work, I noticed the guy sitting across from me had shorts on. He also had no underwear on and I could fully see his "parts" just hanging there. I decided to switch seats but as I stood up to move, the bus jerked. I fell face forward right into his "parts". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 124

You deserved it 1 483

By alice - 14/02/2011 01:18 - United Kingdom

I agree, your life sucks 30 324

You deserved it 3 552

By gringa_Peru - 18/04/2009 01:19 - Peru

Today, I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus, not the norm in Peru. Several minutes after sitting down, I felt something on my shoulder. Thinking it was a hand, I turned my head to look. I came face to face with a dirty man's crotch, it was his erection resting on my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 170 217

You deserved it 9 868

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 897

You deserved it 3 414

Three's a crowd

By Anonymous - 13/08/2014 11:33 - Australia - Rooty Hill

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 682

You deserved it 4 020

By Chris - 22/10/2009 04:57 - Canada

Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 426

You deserved it 4 883

By Anonymous - 06/12/2013 18:15 - Norway - Ytre Arna

Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 207

You deserved it 3 010

By marlow - 15/01/2009 02:25 - Canada

Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 868

You deserved it 2 718

Pervy

By nameless - 09/11/2010 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got on a bus that was so overcrowded I had to stand next to the driver with nothing to hang on to. A drunk man got on and for the rest of the half hour journey continuously fell on me. When I got off, he smiled and told me as the doors were closing, "The last twelve times was for fun." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 104

You deserved it 2 920

ilikeboys 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 16:08

if you took a few steps back wouldn't it have been kinda hard to fall in his lap since he's a couple seats in front of you?

microfilms 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 16:09

how did you manage to turn yourself around to sit on his lap if you were facing him. it would have made more sense if you fell onto him face forward.

Comments

Chowi_fml 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 18:47

How should this be fake? None of you know the exact situation 'cause you weren't there. I can't see how it's impossible to fall on someone's lap in that situation. Anyhow, fake or real, story made me laugh. FYL!

javert24601 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 18:47

"No seats on the bus in which I was taking home?" I guess kudos for TRYING, but still... How does that grammar make sense in ANY universe?

BlockOfRedStone 25

Sunday 13 December 2015 11:46

It makes sense to just about every person who's first language is English.

amknmaz 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 18:49

IF there is a will there is a way (: .

ImAllFailure 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 18:51

#56 how could you not get that? it just means that there were no seats on the bus that he was taking home. And by the way, the grammar was perfect. So I guess kudos to you for failing to diss someone. :)

69someone69 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 18:53

haha i moderated this

Wheat 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 18:53

Maybe she took a few steps backward, and then turned around so she wouldn't feel like he was looking at her anymore? Loads of people post FML's and then leave out the pivotal information needed to have any sense of what happened. It's actually kind of annoying, because depending on what happens after the punchline it could end up not being much of an FYL at all.

dspadres 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 18:59

This would have been funnier if the FML ended with, "that was the most action I've seen in months", or something to that extent.

wowfmlife 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 19:09

Just because the OP said they sat on the guys lap doesn't mean they turned around and sat like in a cair, s/he could have like stattled the guy by accident with her/his face towards him