Intimacy: Today, while getting it on with my boyfriend, I decided to be...

By Anonymous - 01/03/2011 17:32 - United States

Today, while getting it on with my boyfriend, I decided to be spontaneous and do something sexy. I started taking his underwear off with my teeth. My teeth dragged over his shaft, and my braces cut up his foreskin in the process. Now he's not talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 761

You deserved it 62 035

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Tyler - 19/11/2011 08:05 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 249

You deserved it 34 502

A for effort

By NotsexyEnough - 23/11/2009 03:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to be sexy and take off my clothes with his teeth. He ended up biting my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 507

You deserved it 6 490

Come again

By Anonymous - 09/07/2009 07:35

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 994

You deserved it 62 530

By sexyfail - 26/01/2010 08:59 - Australia

Today, I learned that removing your boyfriends boxers with your teeth is waaaay less sexy when you accidentally bite a chunk of his pubes and yank them out in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 228

You deserved it 27 858

You want a piece of me?

By littlepeepboo - 30/01/2018 01:30

Today my boyfriend tried to be sexy and rip off my underwear. Instead, he bit a chunk out of my hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 119

You deserved it 447

Stop! Hammertime!

By shotdown - 04/11/2010 04:18 - United States

Today, in the middle of hot passionate sex with my husband, he stops and tells me he won't be able to finish until I go brush my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 609

You deserved it 41 642

By Brittany - 18/06/2012 14:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 910

You deserved it 38 047

By kinkicali - 20/11/2012 08:43 - United States - Maple Valley

Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 498

You deserved it 36 511

Silver linings

By Anonymous - 27/05/2022 06:00

Today, during sex with my new boyfriend, he gave me such an intense oral sex orgasm, I clenched my jaw and broke one of my back teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 214

You deserved it 315

By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 20:23 - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 770

You deserved it 13 692

iluvhobos 5

Tuesday 1 March 2011 23:06

I'm surprised you didn't get pubes caught in your teeth

dmcp77 1

Tuesday 1 March 2011 23:15

braces and penis do NOT mix. poor guy.

Comments

ryukk_fml 3

Wednesday 2 March 2011 8:54

this exact story has already been posted.. maybe you should actually get a sex-life instead of reposting about everyone else's.

Jorvik 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 9:47

Just be glad you're not his ex girlfriend. :) Also, I feel kind of sorry for the circumcised guys. You've lost out on at least 25% of the pleasure from sex for no reason.

wbt83 0

Saturday 19 March 2011 15:03

I agree!

calvin10 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 10:06

you wearing braces makes me wonder if maybe you're quite the young one anyways...

chopstick2125 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 10:14

I had to wait for my bf to get his braces off before I let him near my fire crotch, but once he did, I found out he can deep throat. See what happens if you wait like you are suppose to?