Intimacy: Today, while getting it on with my boyfriend, I decided to be...

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By Anonymous - 01/03/2011 17:32 - United States

Today, while getting it on with my boyfriend, I decided to be spontaneous and do something sexy. I started taking his underwear off with my teeth. My teeth dragged over his shaft, and my braces cut up his foreskin in the process. Now he's not talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 772

You deserved it 62 057

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Same thing different taste

By Tyler - 19/11/2011 08:05 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 254

You deserved it 34 514

A for effort

By NotsexyEnough - 23/11/2009 03:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to be sexy and take off my clothes with his teeth. He ended up biting my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 517

You deserved it 6 492

Come again

By Anonymous - 09/07/2009 07:35

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 998

You deserved it 62 552

By sexyfail - 26/01/2010 08:59 - Australia

Today, I learned that removing your boyfriends boxers with your teeth is waaaay less sexy when you accidentally bite a chunk of his pubes and yank them out in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 236

You deserved it 27 875

You want a piece of me?

By littlepeepboo - 30/01/2018 01:30

Today my boyfriend tried to be sexy and rip off my underwear. Instead, he bit a chunk out of my hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 128

You deserved it 450

Stop! Hammertime!

By shotdown - 04/11/2010 04:18 - United States

Today, in the middle of hot passionate sex with my husband, he stops and tells me he won't be able to finish until I go brush my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 613

You deserved it 41 657

By Brittany - 18/06/2012 14:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 921

You deserved it 38 063

By kinkicali - 20/11/2012 08:43 - United States - Maple Valley

Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 506

You deserved it 36 529

Silver linings

By Anonymous - 27/05/2022 06:00

Today, during sex with my new boyfriend, he gave me such an intense oral sex orgasm, I clenched my jaw and broke one of my back teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 228

You deserved it 322

By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 20:23 - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 782

You deserved it 13 704

iluvhobos 5

Tuesday 1 March 2011 23:06

I'm surprised you didn't get pubes caught in your teeth

dmcp77 1

Tuesday 1 March 2011 23:15

braces and penis do NOT mix. poor guy.

Comments

Meaningless 1

Wednesday 2 March 2011 5:14

Why the **** would you do that while you have braces.

Army11bMN 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 5:21

Your lucky he didn't donkey punch u

tromboneboy 2

Wednesday 2 March 2011 5:21

shut up woman this isn't an FML you should be posting it should be him posting that you tried to cut his manhood with your braces

11jackson11 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 5:47

Why is having a foreskin so bad? You're born with one and just because it is the norm in America, doesn't make it a god damn universal event. In some places being circumcised is looked down upon, and uncircumcised is preferred an the converse is also true. get the **** over yourselves because him being wrong for having a foreskin is irrelevant to the FML. And F your life.

shortstuff90 4

Wednesday 2 March 2011 5:49

giving head with brace isn't that bad, you just have to be careful not to let them rub against the guy. and of course you have to make sure you don't have pubes in them when you're done. (definitely the downside)

missIrene 6

Wednesday 2 March 2011 5:49

well it's your fault because you should know braces can hurt but he should have been circumsised just sayin

varmanis 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 5:52

I know I would hate to but I do oral on girls . and my braces don't get in the way .

cixelsidgod 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 5:53

how do you do that without purposely trying? you'd have to be scraping the font of your teeth on his dick to do that. And he has the right to be pissed, I'm pissed just thinking about it.