Sex and Miscellaneous: You sure this is the right time?

You sure this is the right time?

By KidCudi227 - 19/07/2011 05:42 - United States

Today, my mom gave me the "birds and the bees" talk, while she was taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 837

You deserved it 3 395

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/02/2012 20:25 - United States

Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 818

You deserved it 37 523

Great chat!

By eric - 16/03/2011 07:31 - United States

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 236

You deserved it 96 457

By me - 08/06/2012 14:00 - United States - Carthage

Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 487

You deserved it 2 710

By seaweedlady - 21/06/2011 14:49 - United States

Today, my mother tried to have a conversation with me. While she was taking a piss. With the bathroom door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 985

You deserved it 4 875

By ReallyMom - 09/01/2014 21:48 - United States - Shawano

Today, my mom tried giving me the sex talk. Her version of "the talk" consisted of making me watch videos of guys jacking off and reassuring me that "it's natural." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 692

You deserved it 5 204

Not now!

By Anonymous - 18/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 93

Don't wanna know

By Anonymous - 16/02/2011 05:50

Today, my dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 207

You deserved it 4 187

By dpl - 19/02/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 579

You deserved it 5 635

By lobotomy pls - 11/09/2015 18:40 - United States - Tappahannock

Today, I walked in on my mom, legs spread and changing her tampon, all while she was carrying on a conversation on the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 398

You deserved it 4 530

By PPP - 28/04/2015 15:05 - United States

Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 658

You deserved it 3 338

livgasms 4

Tuesday 19 July 2011 12:01

classy.

Lukeloveshugs 8

Tuesday 19 July 2011 12:04

Why didn't you just leave? its not as if she can follow you while taking a dump.

Comments

ZiplockP 0

Tuesday 19 July 2011 15:30

nothing like a classy lady

iLoveBoobies21 0

Tuesday 19 July 2011 15:32

What tha ****?

EmilyFelton98 0

Tuesday 19 July 2011 15:33

the toilet BEST Place To Have THE TALK

SpotShot 6

Tuesday 19 July 2011 15:35

lol hahaha!!!

MareNostrum 0

Tuesday 19 July 2011 15:42

Brown birds?

Cleao18317 11

Tuesday 19 July 2011 16:23

and sometimes green

burgerburger 0

Tuesday 19 July 2011 15:48

why were you in there?

tylenol123 0

Tuesday 19 July 2011 15:52

were you wathin her...0.0

missyj0 12

Tuesday 19 July 2011 17:01

I really hope she wasn't "wathin" her.

kris2335 0

Tuesday 19 July 2011 15:56

HOW ATTRACTIVE;DD

pinkrink9 5

Tuesday 19 July 2011 16:09

why were you in there?

AmethystRain 20

Tuesday 19 July 2011 16:10

Maybe she thought the expression was "turds and the bees".

Keywords

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The Top

Today, after years of training myself to crave healthier foods in order to lose weight, I found out that some of my favorite health foods actually aggravate my hypothyroidism, and indirectly reduce my metabolism. Broccoli and soybeans are making me fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 977

You deserved it 3 688

Today, while on vacation with my siblings and the horde of nieces and nephews, me and hubby managed to sneak in a quickie. It was a quickie alright. For the first time in our marriage he blew his load after 2 strokes because he was afraid of being interrupted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 055

You deserved it 679

The Top

Today, I was flying back home from college with my Mom. At the airport, the ticket agent tells us she only has one ticket listed for Margaret. My mom and I have the same name. American Airlines thought a Margaret had bought two tickets by mistake, so they cancelled one of the transactions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 896

You deserved it 4 577

Today, I was demoted at work to a much harder and more time-consuming position because, I quote, "You have more experience." My boss is now telling the others I volunteered to be moved to the lower position. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 022

You deserved it 78

Today, I was at the mall with my 7-year-old granddaughter. When we entered a clothing store, she pulled me back, saying loudly, "Grandma! This is 'Forever 21'! 'Currently 58' is down that way!" I blame my son for this little troll. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 092

You deserved it 339

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying in his bed. I was watching the Terminator on T.V. A commercial came on in the middle of the movie. We just started having sex when the movie came back on he said "I'll be back." in the Arnold Schwartzenegger accent and rolled over to watch the movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 847

You deserved it 4 617

Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a math test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 657

You deserved it 4 351

Today, while I was putting up Christmas lights, my younger brother wouldn't stop pestering me. It seems he hadn't forgotten the time I gave myself an electric shock last year, and he wanted to see if I'd do it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 213

You deserved it 3 580