Humping

By needanotherbed - 28/05/2014 14:21 - United Kingdom - Ipswich

Spicy
Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 52 413
You deserved it 6 196

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Keep your phone on you and tape him doing it. Does it always happen on a Wednesday? Wednesday is hump day, y'know.

Comments

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Dude, no. They are the things that make relationships funny and interesting, it makes them last when you find out these things about your partner.

How can he help what he does in his sleep? My wife takes her clothes off in her sleep sometimes lol, her face in the morning is always priceless

You never know, he might be actually awake and just trolling you. I agree with everyone else, record it and see what he does. It might abruptly stop or it might continue.... Hopefully not! If it does, just Erm.... Buy him a pillow I guess. I usually always have to have something between my legs to sleep. Not for this reason necessarily but it might work! Good luck OP!

I'm kind of curious as to why you sleep with something between your legs #52

It helps align your spine #64, some chiropractors recommend it

A more specific scenario but it's recommended if you have bad knees or hips too to keep them from further injury through the night. My step dad had horrible arthritis in his hips and I have knee disorders and we've both had it recommended.

My boyfriend sleeps with a thin pillow between his knees (he's a side sleeper) to keep his legs comfortable. It's not all that weird. :3

#1 is wrong. Take advantage while he's sleeping. Nookie time!

#101: I like how you think. @OP: No seriously, why not make the best of it and have a little fun yourself.

This way you can then have evidence enough to ask him if he was a dog in a past life!

Demig0d6 14

75, from what my woman tells me, I do that too. I sort of believe her tho, mainly because I'm weird haha

Record it. And imagine the fun when you show the video in family/friends get together in future.

OP should probably ask him to visit his doctor. I watched a documentary about something similar to this. :/

Put it on youtube..? Make millions? ;) we have a hit!

Video cameras were invented for this very reason :p

Pretty sure that's not why there were invented #3

xXHollowIchigoXx 17

Its not why they were invented, but still a reason to use one :P

AnOriginalName 19

So video cameras weren't invented to record people who are sleeping and humping? Oh. I've got some explaining to do.....

Oh geez. Well it could be worse, some people even sleep drive

I did that once when I was prescribed Ambien by my doctor. I apparently drove 3 hours across the state because when I "woke up". I was almost on Alabama ( I live in MS). Never touched that stuff again.

Wow. That's terrifying! Glad you didn't crash!

Keep your phone on you and tape him doing it. Does it always happen on a Wednesday? Wednesday is hump day, y'know.

I can't be the only one thinking of a certain camel right now yelling "HUMP DAAAAYYY!!!"

VengeanceChicken 12

Yes, it was literally the first thing that popped into my head...

Is there a chance that he dreams of being a dog?

lexiieeex3 32

I wonder what he's dreaming about...

I'd laugh hysterically if my man did that. Love the crazy things people do while they are sleeping.

I violently scream and kick/punch people who try and move me. I once broke an old man's nose when he tried waking me up in public. Nice to know someone loves it :)

Respect101 17

That's good to know, now every one knows not to wake you. Because everyone will be seeing you sleep in public.

Oh god, I hope people don't think I Intentionally broke an old mans nose. Or that I kick/punch people who do wake me up.

Your bf isn't the only one. My bf did something similar a few times. He was so confused and ashamed afterwards, poor guy.

raeepressley 12

My boyfriend has done that once or twice. Same situation, he was embarrassed until I told him I thought it was hilarious. Then we had a good laugh about it.

I would say my bf bla bla bla but I'm too anti-social to have a boyfriend. But I have a dog tho.

#78 your comment made me snort and I woke up my cat. Thanks for the chuckle. :)