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Dad jokes, part #23556
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Comments
yep your dads a prick
I'm going to have to agree with you. I mean there's having a joke with your kids but that's just rude.
72, of her dad can't take a comeback, he shouldnt have cracked a joke.
Ay, tell yo dad, "ay vuck ya mavukka"
Shut up, Meg.
Least you have a boyfriend. That should count for something right?
If only it did, but unfortunately with a dad like that I doubt OP is feeling the love.
OP can't be satisfied with her boyfriend being attracted to her. My mom never thinks I look right, but there's always going to be someone who doesn't.
42- I'll admit it is kind of different. But with my mom last summer I overheard her telling my sister that if I got any bigger she wouldn't LET me wear a bikini. I took this to heart and now I've lost 20 or more pounds. When we went to the doctor and realized this she cried and told me I couldn't see my boyfriend if it didn't stop. She thinks I'm anorexic now. Recently I asked her if she could buy me some shorts because nothing fits anymore, and she yelled at me to eat and quit losing weight. Mind you, I don't starve myself. On other occasions she'll ask me if I plan to wear makeup that day, and if not, she gives me a dirty look or something. I asked if we could switch to atleast 2 percent milk because we buy whole and I understand that isn't healthy, and she told me I needed to drink all the whole milk I could with what I weigh. Sorry, you probably didn't have to know all that, but I felt like venting on fml. We all know that's a good idea.
Elsewhere I quoted a comedian. Now I'll try a former First Lady of the United States: no one makes you feel inferior without your permission. NoReservations, it sounds like you are trying not to give your mother's words too much power and that's great. It also sounds like you try to maintain an open-minded opinion of yourself and that's great, too. Just remember that your mother's is just one opinion and hers isn't even the most important. I've said it before but I'll say it again - raising people is hard. Your mother might want you to be as perfect as she believes you can be and doesn't realise she's leaving you with the impression you're not good enough. Or she's just a bitch. Being people is hard, too.
Yeah, I don't want to let myself go or overlook something, but it's getting to the point where I can't be happy with what I do either. But what sucks the most is she thinks it's my boyfriend's fault. He's the only one that's taken time to talk to me about it and ask what I don't like about myself. Of course, those are his favorite things about me. He has helped me a lot, saying things like I have a one inch waist, I'm perfect, when he hugs me he tells me how tiny I am, etc. He wouldn't say that if I thought I was too skinny myself, though. So if I can deal with that, I think OP has a good chance at being ok. My dad tells me I'm going to get as big around as our car if I so much as eat 3 pieces of candy. (True story, I had just unwrapped the third) They were bite-size, but after that I put them down.
Parents are always like that, at least mine are lol. I feel like my parents just want to see me prosper and be the best i can, although they say, you shouldn't eat to much, you should go run afew miles, go to the gym everyday, and i had a girlfriend of 1year 9months and my parents kept saying from day one, you can do better, she makes you sad and treats you like shit and puts you down and she tries to controll me and well i loved her and everything and she was my first girlfriend i had sex with so i felt closer to her than anyone else so i wanted to be with her. My parents were right though, she made my self esteem go down so low, i was 145pounds and 5ft 11 and everyime i went to the beach with my girlfriend she'd say ew is that fat on you? and i would hear that constantly from my family and girlfriend and when i finally just had nothing left to give and vented out to drugs and alcohol i drifted away from my family and friends, lost my girlfriend buy than one day i just said **** everyone and told myself to love myself before i can love anyone else, i tried to find myself and who i am and now i'm 17, 165 pounds 6ft 1inch and my self esteem is the highest i can ever remember it being, some nights i still just fall apart because of my past and shit, and no i havn't told you everything trust me i had a shitty childhood, had cops called on my parents abusing my brother and I countless times, he is a bad drunk. But well to the point of this lol. If you feel are told you aren't good enough by people, most likely, their life isn't going so well and they are trying to make you feel down so they feel alittle better, also just ignore them, prove them wrong, show you're happy and prospering. The best revenge is success. The best way i boost my self esteem is talking to other to make them smile, it always puts a smile on my face to see i can, even for a moment, make someone's day alittle more brighter. Also work on yourself, not saying you are ugly and out of shape but i find running, even if it just a football size run, do it everday and increase slightly each time and it will honestly make you feel more alive and healthier, it has nothing to do with you being fat, when i was 145 pounds i was so unathletic and couldn't run at all far, so for anyone of you with low self esteem just forget everyone else, work on yourself, make yourself happy and no one else's thoughts of you matter. Have a good day. :)
Sorry 63, I just read an essay's worth of comments preceding yours, and I'm not about to read your novel. But chin up NoReservations, I promise it gets better later; if not by counselling and break throughs, then at least by time and love (with or without your mother involved).
Ya. You proved him wrong by getting a boyfriend in the first place.
I don't want to believe that all the parents on FML are such assholes. It's your kid don't be a dick.
I'm with you here #3 - FML seems to be largely populated by kids with parents who want to rob them and belittle them. Of course this could be a joke but kids are often terribly sensitive about that type of thing and the very slight comedy value doesn't seem to justify the risk of giving your child a complex. OP - your dad's an ass. Best ignore his stupid comments and assume he's trying to be funny.
Haha, what your dad says only means that he has a good sense of humor, and apparently you don't
If OP has a poor self image, even the most well intended joke could sting.
From the sounds of it, this isn't the first time something like this has happened. After a while it stops being a joke and just becomes cruel.
Either you're trolling (which I really, REALLY hope) or you are just a sad excuse for a human being. If a parent makes such remarks towards his / her kids, it will scar them for life. I would never wish something similar to happen to anyone, but if someone would deserve it, it would be people like you. You should be ashamed of yourself.
How is a father calling his daughter ugly funny?
Well, I'm sure he wasn't being serious or anything. Doesn't every dad normally make jokes or end up doing something to embarrass the daughter/son anyway?
^Yeah, bringing your kid's self-confidence is sooo ******* funny. Hey, I have a sense of humour too. Should i use it to bring people down?
If you really wanted to shock your dad, you should have replied "Nah he doesn't need one. He prefers to wear the collar himself."
That's a good backfire. Too bad I can never think quick enough to come up with witty one :(
"He gave me the leash and some 'treats' to give him. Want to see me walk him, dad?"
I can think of witty comebacks.... About four hours after the argument :(
Dad: That's great! Teach him how to play catch and fetch the mail and if he is poddie trained he can sleep in the house, if not he sleeps outside. OP: I can keep him?! Thank you daddy! Dad: If i catch him humping anything in this house i'm walking him down to the basement with my shotgun and than you're dumping him in the woods.
If he usually makes jokes, don't take it too seriously OP! your dad could have been trying to be funny to impress the new guy. but if he meant to it actually hurt your feelings then I'm sorry :-(
Yeah, I know someone who's dad is like that, some people think they are funny but they're really jerks. You should talk to your dad about how you feel, get him to buy you some new shoes or something to cheer you up.
Hey OP, you have a boyfriend! So your boyfriend sees how great you are :) Forget about what your dad says. Don't listen to him or it could affect your relationship. :)
How can she when her dad keeps taking it away?
24- Telling her dad to can it would be a step in the right direction.
A comedian once said: It's called self-esteem. It's how you feel about yourself. How can I take that away? I'm paraphrasing and he was over-simplifying but the gist is don't let your father's words bring you down, OP. At a certain point in our lives, we have to separate ourselves from our parents' image of us. If you've gone through years of emotional abuse, this may feel impossible. It's not. Do a fair assessment of yourself. Take away the emotion and see yourself for who you really are. Feel free to change this self opinion when you improve something about yourself. Just remember that someone else's words won't change the truth about you.
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yep your dads a prick
If you really wanted to shock your dad, you should have replied "Nah he doesn't need one. He prefers to wear the collar himself."