By sad - 17/06/2016 22:37 - United States - Belleville
The Top
By lyinginbed - 04/06/2016 19:45 - United Kingdom
Lucid
By Man Shamed - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Hyattsville
Raincheck
By sadnj - 23/01/2017 15:30
By DamnMyOvaries - 02/05/2017 17:00 - United States - Groves
Dad jokes FTW!
By rositaleigh - 01/07/2019 00:06
Merry Christmas!
By yek - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Israel - Tel Aviv
Say hello to my plastic friend!
By Pandathepilot - 10/11/2017 15:00
By Lisbeth - 07/01/2018 19:30 - Canada - Mascouche
Awkward much?
By iskalion - 10/10/2015 05:39 - Canada - Grande Prairie
By France Howell - 10/05/2018 15:00
By Firequeen - 21/11/2016 21:44
She'll be single for a looong time...
By keiler - 06/08/2018 01:30
By R - 05/09/2016 10:27 - Australia - Melbourne
By Lisa - 03/10/2018 23:00 - Romania
By Rosie - 16/10/2018 12:00
By BaconGirl - 08/07/2016 06:00
By LadyGoombah - 07/07/2016 01:54 - United States - State College
LadyGoombah tells us more.
By thanks, fuckface - 16/11/2012 19:42 - United States - Parachute
By Anonymous - 16/05/2017 20:00
By no paedo - 11/03/2016 20:35 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh
By Miscellaneous - 17/06/2017 19:00 - United Kingdom
By CrazyTrainWreck - 05/07/2017 12:19
CrazyTrainWreck tells us more.
OP here: 1. To the gentleman (or gentlewoman, didn't bother to check) who said I stole her little boy, no that would be girl. So yeah there is that. 2. I don't hate my mother-in-law nor does she hate me. Hell her family treats me better than my own. Now let me get on with the back story: We we're out there (in Texas from Arizona) due to my Mother-in-law getting remarried. We got a call that one of my in-laws was broken down and needed help, so I got up to help. I asked my mother-in-law if she could put my laptop and charger away. She told me I didn't have to worry, the dogs wouldn't chew it up etc but she would put it up. It's not a big deal apart from the fact they live in a small town in Texas and it's a bit of a drive to get to a store with new cords. With wedding preparations and all that, wasn't an option right away to get a new one. Hope that clears up some confusion though I'm sure I just created more. (Also this is my first posted FML, yay)
By Stressed dad - 18/07/2017 20:00
By MenstrualCrampsRuinedMyAcademicFuture - 25/07/2017 19:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow
Great plan. Solid.
By Monagro - 14/09/2017 07:00 - United States - New York
Goodbye horses
By Anonymous - 23/10/2017 16:19
By Anonymous - 08/11/2017 05:00
By Anonymous - 27/04/2018 20:30
By GeesLouisee - 01/05/2018 15:00
Keywords
Hey guys, OP here! I've been having fun reading the comments and, out of context, I would totally deserve this. However, this happened about 6 years ago and I just wanted to share this with you all because my mom is an FML gem haha. "My dog" was actually the dog I received as my 13th birthday present. In all honesty though, he was more my mom's dog than anything.. she even chose the breed so it appealed to her tastes rather than the rest of the family's (standard poodle). Then she let my sister name him after she threw a hissy fit and he was dubbed Danzig (Danny). But Danny was great and really smart when we first got him. He caught onto tricks almost instantaneously. Sadly, my mom who is only 4'11 and 90 lbs and a total nut thought allowing a grown 1 year old standard poodle to jump out of the car on his own was too much to ask of him and was convinced she was supposed to carry him out instead until one day she dropped him on his head on the driveway. He actually had brain damage and he was unable to be trained very easily (it took months just to reteach him his name) but he was still such a sweetheart and a joy to be around! So when I say she "untrained my dog", it had much less to do with him not listening to commands and more to do with the fact that he had been respectful of other people and gentle and knew not to eat food off of the counters until after I left.. in which case she taught him it was okay to jump full force on guests, steal food off of people's plate (he made attempts even when you were watching!) and, of course, SOMEHOW teaching him to fart on command to "toot toot!" (she didn't even know how she successfully did it. Probably just by saying "toot toot!" every time he farted for 6 months). My mom thought it was the greatest thing and during dinners she would just yell "toot toot!" and Danny would release some of the most vile farts haha As for the people wondering why I left my dog for 6 months with my mom, I'm sure in context you can see it was to go pursue an education since when I left I was 18. I'm 24 now with my own lovely black lab Nylah and I can barely leave her with a dog sitter for more than a day without feeling guilty! For your own amusement, I have made my profile picture of the dog Danny (if you look, you'll see red and orange on the top of his head. That's because my mom gave him a mohawk from head to bottom and had it dyed red).