Cats, Neighbours, Thief and Animals: Alas, poor Salem

Alas, poor Salem

By Stalked - 15/11/2011 00:46 - United States

Today, a policeman and I confronted my psychotic neighbor, who stole my cat because she thinks flea bites cause cancer. She refused to tell us what she'd done with the cat. I just spent $100 last month in vet bills, and my kids are crying for their pet. He's probably in pieces in her freezer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 710

You deserved it 2 770

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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Same thing different taste

Nice try, Janet

By Anonymous - 06/04/2014 19:37

Today, I witnessed my psycho neighbor put her cat in a cage, cross into my backyard, and set the cage down before returning to her house. She then called the cops and claimed I'd stolen her cat. The cops didn't believe my side of the story for a second. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 785

You deserved it 3 512

By Nekro_Kat - 10/08/2011 03:00 - United States

Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 803

You deserved it 3 898

Cat Burglar!

By Aimee Lutz - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, I found my lost cat. As I was hooking it up to a leash to get it in my car, a man approached and asked what I was doing. His kids alerted him that there was a woman stealing their cat from their front lawn. It was not my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 408

You deserved it 1 335

Bottom line

By strangeprincess - 09/09/2019 16:00

Today, I had to put my cat to sleep after she was in an accident. While I was crying hysterically, the vet asked me for $230. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 893

You deserved it 311

By Username - 14/08/2011 07:16 - United States

Today, I spent $500 buying my lost cat back from a jerk who thought it was his. I get home and my mom tells me that she'd sold it to the same guy for $10 because she thought the cat was ruining my love life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 955

You deserved it 6 436

Alas…

By Mum2be - 15/08/2021 04:01

Today, I saved a kitten from the streets, cleaned her up and asked the vet what I should do with her because she was the sweetest thing and my cat has a highly contagious illness. The vet had to put her down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 039

You deserved it 125

Karen has concerns

By go away karen! - 29/01/2023 05:00 - United States

Today, I had to call the cops on my batshit crazy neighbor, who’s repeatedly threatened to steal my dog. I finally got her ass on camera. She swears that my dog is being abused because it prefers to sleep outside instead of being in the house. Imagine that, an animal that likes being outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 140

The creepy guy next door

By Anonymous - 05/06/2013 22:09 - United Kingdom - Worcester Park

Today, the crazy son of a bitch who lives next door to me once again got into a loud, rather one-sided argument with his cat. Twenty minutes later, he knocked on my door, asking if he could stay at my place for a couple of days. The look he gave me when I said no has me fearing for my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 110

You deserved it 4 484

By seriously - 24/05/2013 07:04 - United States

Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 744

You deserved it 4 575

Cats and Cars

By Anonymous - 21/07/2014 22:49 - United States - Dublin

Today, I had to take my cat to the vet. On the way there, he managed to get out of his cage, climb into the front seat, onto my chest, and howl in my face as I tried to drive down the highway. I ended up with stitches and still got charged for missing my cat's appointment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 616

You deserved it 5 918

FYLDeep 25

Tuesday 15 November 2011 8:41

Well I hope that bitch is locked up in a jail-cell now.

deviable 9

Tuesday 15 November 2011 8:45

Tell her human bites cause cancer. Then bite her.

Comments

lies_ah 3

Wednesday 16 November 2011 0:12

$100 ... isn't a lot

bloog510 6

Wednesday 16 November 2011 1:23

Oh if it's not, then I'll take the hundred dollars you're so easily willing to give up and donate to a charity. But of course that's only if it's not a lot.

iAmPaul 49

Wednesday 16 November 2011 0:21

I'm picturing OP's neighbour as that crazy cat lady from the Simpsons, you know, the one in the movie who's at the lake crazily washing her cats? ;) Woops didn't see 68's comment before posting mine... :$

ZombieLoveA 0

Wednesday 16 November 2011 0:57

Omg that was the worst possible way you could have ended that >.

cash_monkey72 9

Wednesday 16 November 2011 1:36

This my friend, is why you talk softly and carry a big gun. I'm paraphrasing of course.

iMagzzzy 0

Wednesday 16 November 2011 1:53

*And I

skyeyez9 24

Wednesday 16 November 2011 2:28

I dont own a cat but I have two dogs whom I love dearly. If my neighbor stole them like they did in this story, I would be sick with grief....then madder than Hell. I.would think of ways to get even and follow thru. Two wrongs dont make a right but it makes you feel better.

skyeyez9 24

Wednesday 16 November 2011 2:30

Did you check local animal shelters? Bring pocs of the cat in. Hopefully he will be there. Or if a worker recognizes the cat pic and and crazy neighbor (if the hag broight.it in to get euthanized).

Inediblepeaches 15

Wednesday 16 November 2011 2:38

That's why I don't even let my dog outside. (She's way smaller than a cat and a hawk would probably love to have her for dinner.) My cat however roams freely outside and she's fine. Cars are probably stronger in that sense than dogs, but dogs are probably smart enough to know if the neighbor coming towards it with a knife is bad news.