Better late than never

By onehundredpercenteffed - 14/08/2009 01:46 - United States

Spicy
Today, my wife thought it would be fun to bring in one of her girlfriends for a threesome. Because of the friend, I now know what my wife sounds like when she's having a REAL orgasm. Five years and two kids into our marriage. FML
I agree, your life sucks 56 572
You deserved it 21 033
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

MaxOfMetal 0

OMG! A girl is better at giving another girl an ******?!?!?! ALERT THE PRESSES!!!!!!!!

229 14
drakerd 0

You're seriously whinging about getting a threesome?

226 16

Comments

Tubasaurus 0

Ask you wife what ACTUALLY pleases her. If she just sits there during sex and does nothing then it's no wonder she doesn't have orgasms. Take tips from the friend if you wife won't give you any.

5 3
I_HAVE_A_BIG_DIC 0

#29 what pleases her is a big dick thats what pleases all girls which what he obiously does not have. try not to say dum things like that

0 2
FalconWhitaker 20

Yes, because clearly you are the expert on what pleases all women sexually. I mean, there is no such thing as a woman who is quite small and therefore finds a big dick painful, or a woman who cannot ****** from vaginal stimulation alone, oh no, they're just a bunch of ***** who long for big ****. TRRRRROOOOOOLLLL IN THE COMMENTS, #31!

5 4
rotyeqnor 0

# 31: If his wife is only pleased by big dicks then she wouldn't get an ****** from another chick (unless they would use a giant ***** or something but thats unlikely since the OP didn't mention that) I guess it's more a FYL for his wife then for him, having to be five years with a guy and him not be able to find your pleasurespot even once. (at least he got the 3-some and five years of ignorence

3 2
Chocolate_Cake 0

#30, if you knew women, you'd also know that some girls just CANT have an ****** that way. But yeah, no need for a fml here. Most girls/women fake.

4 2
I_HAVE_A_BIG_DIC 0

#32 you just havnt benn laid by a really big dick. thats all

0 0
plexico 3

If you have to say you have a big dick, you don't have a big dick. If you really did have one, then the news would spread by word of mouth. It's just like anyone who says they are cool, isn't. Or any so-called news network that says it is fair and balanced is actually neither.

1 2
FalconWhitaker 20

I hate it when I hear about women faking orgasms. It's completely stupid and utterly, UTTERLY pointless. If a woman fakes an ******, her man will not necessarily know. He will think that he has fulfilled her. He will think that he is Captain Sex Machine or whatever. And HE WILL NOT CHANGE. The woman will have to go on faking. She will not get anything out of sex. And she will help to ruin that man's sexual performance FOREVER because he will get the idea that he's such a freakin' sex GOD that he must not be doing anything wrong, and any subsequent girlfriend who tries to talk to him will get blocked out. Here's a novel idea, ladies and gentlemen! TALK. TO. EACH. OTHER. If your man does not fulfil you in bed, tell him what makes you feel good and insist that he takes time out to do it sometime! It is good for everyone - it helps the gentleman improve on his performance as he learns more about what makes different female bodies feel good, and it helps the lady feel good (which, I must add, will probably make her feel like having sex more if she knows she's getting something out of it). So yeah, FYL because your wife didn't bother telling you that there was a problem, so how the hell could you have gone about fixing it if you didn't know it was there? tl;dr: Women, stop faking orgasms - it's stupid. FYL, OP.

17 5
AmberHall 2

You're right in essentials, but don't forget that a lot of men don't like being told they're doing things wrong. They fuss and whine to the extent that you think 'it's not worth the trouble' and simply do it yourself

5 1
aintgotnogramma 0

Just be happy she stayed with you after 5 years of no orgasms. She must really love you, or she masturbates alot. Whatever

6 4
spamrice 0

This guy has it SOLID. Seriously, I couldn't vote either way so I didn't... His life isn't "f"-ed and he is having fun with TWO SETS OF ****!!!

4 4
anonacs 0

how can u not know if your wife is faking an ******? it ust feel ok to never see her lose her breath, or shake, or anything significant. noises and slight body movements aren't shit. it isnt just her if you've never seen a woman ******. also, ive never ****** a woman that did not cum from penetration. do all the women out there that claim some girls cant cum from penetration think im just lucky? no, you just haent been ****** right

3 9
monnanon 13

There is a lot of evidence that some women cannot cum from penetration alone, Its not a failing if a man cannot get his girlfriend to cum in that way as it is easier for a woman to reach ****** in other ways. The mere fact you have shouted out to the whole interwebs that every woman you have been with has orgasmed through penetrative sex alone makes me think that you are probably making it up. Either that or you are a victim of fakery.

4 1
star_ver 0

It's something like less than 25% of women can cum from vaginal penetration alone. So either yours were faking, or you're extremely lucky to keep picking women from that 25%. I'd bet on the former, though.

2 1
Gwythinn 0

Here's the deal: that statistic may or may not be true (lies, damn lies, and statistics) about vaginal penetration alone, but if you're doing it right, ******* is a lot more than just vaginal penetration. If you think ******* is nothing more than that, f your partner's life.

3 1
soul3n 0

"wah, my wife is cool enough to experiment and have a threesome with me, FML" you live a tough life.

3 4
I_HAVE_A_BIG_DIC 0

#42 can i join. if your thinking no i think if you read my name will change your mind ;]

0 1
plexico 3

Are you sure she doesn't make different sounds for a vaginal ****** and a clitoral one? Don't know the difference? Look it up. Getting to have a threesome while you are married is a dream come true. Having your wife initiate it is ******* perfect! What the **** are you complaining about? She could tell you that your children were fathered by your brother and you should still have that smile on your face! I assume the girlfriend was hot. If she were a butch, flannel-wearing lesbian, I'm sure that would have made the FML.

2 0
sublime93 0

Flannel wearing LMFAO

1 0
plexico 3

You should thank your lucky stars that when your wife wanted a threesome, the other person wasn't a DUDE. How would you like to see your wife have an explosive ****** while riding another guy's pole?

2 0