Birthday, Awkward and Love: Get out there

Get out there

By imnotTHATlonely - 18/05/2009 20:43 - United States

Today, two of my cousins sat me down and said they wanted to give me an early birthday present. With straight faces, they looked at me and said: "We signed you up for eHarmony, and paid for 12 months." Not only do my cousins think I need help finding a boyfriend, but they think it'll take a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 352

You deserved it 5 806

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

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Same thing different taste

All in the family

By Anonymous - 04/12/2020 02:02

Today, I found out my boyfriend of a year is actually my cousin. Thanks, Mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 004

You deserved it 110

By Anonymous - 08/07/2019 18:01 - United States

Today, I'm so single, I signed up for a free consultation on an LGBT arranged marriage site. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 341

You deserved it 422

Weirdo

By whateven333 - 18/02/2015 04:02 - United States - Gibsonia

Today, I told my cousin that I would gladly help him get through the loss of my aunt. That is until he started flirting with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 919

You deserved it 2 685

By Anon - 13/06/2009 05:17 - United States

Today, I realized that I've been a member of eHarmony for almost a year. No one has ever contacted me out of the 134 people I've been "scientifically" matched with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 547

You deserved it 7 314

By Brittany - 23/12/2012 02:33 - United States

Today, a guy professed his love for me in front of my friends. The guy is my first cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 657

You deserved it 3 515

Thanks but no thanks

By Anonymous - 04/07/2012 18:01 - United States

Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 541

You deserved it 2 405

Pranked

By Anonymous - 30/03/2016 06:53 - United States - Manchester

Today, I introduced my long-distance boyfriend of 2 years to my friends. I told him how my friends jokingly call him my imaginary Internet boyfriend. He thought it was so funny that when they met, he claimed to be my cousin, saying that I paid him to pretend to be my boyfriend. They believed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 293

You deserved it 2 994

Keeping it in the family

By Anonymous - 12/10/2021 15:01 - Jordan - Amman

Today, my dad tried to hook me up with someone. It wouldn't be so bad if she wasn't my cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 914

You deserved it 85

By Az - 13/06/2012 00:24 - United States - Dallas

Today, I woke up to a guy outside my house, who wanted to give me flowers and take me out on a date. Aside from it all being pretty fucking creepy anyway, the guy is my not quite right in the head second cousin, who's apparently now head-over-heels in love with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 926

You deserved it 2 383

It's a match!

By Noname - 30/01/2009 22:08 - United States

Today, I went out to eat with my aunt and uncle, I barely looked at the male waiter because I'm a shy person. Then my uncle said, "YOU SHOULD TAKE OUT MY NIECE! She's never dated in her life." I'm 19 and my matchmaker is my uncle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 729

You deserved it 3 349

ohhhhshizzz 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 2:53

Oh dude, what a bitch. Well you should sign THEM up for some **** site.

rissyboo4 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 2:53

um, wow that's really unfortunate? on the bright side maybe you'll finally find your special someone =) first :D

Comments

jessb_fml 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 13:10

Wow. Harsh.

papertigers_fml 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 13:18

it take a year because you is ugly (just trying to speak your language here)

bmalloy1981 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 14:34

That sucks U should get them back somehow if someone ever did that to me i kick them where it counts

Rabyd 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 14:58

Lol.. #3 is right.

jillz 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 15:22

How rude of them. Definitely FYL. Just refuse to cooperate.

sheni_009 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 17:33

Actually I think that's really nice of them. They just want you to be happy.

anonymrs 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 17:35

It's kind of insulting that they bought it for you, but I would use it anyway if I were you. I know a lot of people who were sick of dating men with no jobs/ go nowhere jobs that weren't interested in commitment, and found something completely different than all that on eharmony.

SouLEater_fml 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 18:28

Hey i didn't see the most important question. Whats your User name? :D

miaumiau 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 19:48

that's expensive stuff! i signed up for match.com just for fun a couple of years ago, and even uploaded a dumb picture of myself. after i started getting people interested in me i put up a more serious profile/picture and now i'm engaged! it is a little insulting... but if you find your soulmate on there i don't think you'll be complaining. plus, it'll give you a great "how we met" story. :) good luck!