Kids: Inappropriate but funny

Inappropriate but funny

By um... maybe - 12/03/2013 22:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I was helping my father-in-law out at a family barbecue. Somehow, the topic turned to grand-children, at which point I confessed that my wife has been having trouble conceiving. His response was to boom: "Sure you've been putting it in the right hole, son?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 009

You deserved it 5 037

The rhythm of the fight
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Same thing different taste

Charming dude

By unzucht - 30/05/2012 16:45 - Romania - Bucharest

Today, my wife and I convened our families for a joint dinner, followed by me breaking the news that my wife is pregnant. My father visibly scoffed, and my grandfather spent the rest of the evening muttering to him about how "breeders should be shot". Wonderful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 737

You deserved it 2 495

By crazy mother in law - 17/12/2012 18:48

Today, my husband told my mother-in-law that we're trying to have a baby. She decided to call me and explain in extreme detail what positions to try, and when. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 125

You deserved it 5 027

Little shit

By Anonymous - 12/12/2021 16:58

Today, while at a family reunion, I jokingly asked my 18-year-old son, "When are you and your girlfriend going to give me a grandson?" He then retorted, "When are you going to die?" I was unable to answer at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 424

You deserved it 1 711

But my grandbabiiiiiiiies

By Anonymous - 23/01/2016 09:21 - Australia - Canberra

Today, after the topic of grandkids came up yet again, my fiancé confessed that we've been having trouble conceiving. Later, I overheard his mum telling him to take my engagement ring back to the store and get a refund, because apparently I'm not worth marrying if I can't give him kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 023

You deserved it 1 644

By Anonymous - 28/10/2012 16:44 - United States

Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 066

You deserved it 6 155

Weird flex, but OK

By Anonymous - 16/02/2021 19:02 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, I learned that my mother-in-law gives better head than my wife. How? It wasn't from my experience, but thanks to a casual conversation with my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 435

You deserved it 163

By lababy - 15/11/2011 17:20 - United States

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 785

You deserved it 21 160

By Steve.mc - 01/05/2011 07:03 - Canada

Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 469

You deserved it 7 979

By Margo - 15/11/2011 15:16 - United States

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 262

You deserved it 64 306

Misery loves company

By Anonymous - 03/10/2011 21:41 - United Kingdom

Today, my 20 year-old daughter started ranting to me about her latest boyfriend's erectile problems. Trying to be a good dad, I told her all I knew about how to get the boy fixed. My wife decided to stick her head in and say, "Listen to your dad, hun. He knows all about this kind of thing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 913

You deserved it 5 806

AlittleSanity 11

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:43

The left one, right?

tacojauns 45

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:45

Hey man any hole is a goal

Comments

Ashamed_Sister 60

Wednesday 13 March 2013 7:49

He only tried to make a joke, but he could have said something worse.

seaman83 8

Wednesday 13 March 2013 7:53

no one cares

seaman83 8

Wednesday 13 March 2013 8:14

OK. stand up for yourself and tell him to " shove it up his right hole." no need to take that kind of abuse.

LaLince 40

Wednesday 13 March 2013 8:51

Why are you assuming that only your wife has been having trouble conceiving? Never thought about that you could be part of the problem?

Angelastic_fml 18

Wednesday 13 March 2013 10:21

Agreed; what OP meant was 'we have been having trouble conceiving'.

blink_kid 32

Wednesday 13 March 2013 21:21

Exactly! If you've been having trouble, both go and get tested and fin out which one of you has issues. Don't just assume it's your wife.

kishorekumar_a 10

Wednesday 13 March 2013 9:00

Awkward *sound of the flames of the barbeque in background* *crickets chirping*

FlyingMonkey228 5

Wednesday 13 March 2013 9:09

Apparently a real life case too... Couple were so devoutly religious/conservative that no one REALLY explained biology to them so neither realised they were putting it in the wrong place till they went to the doctors...

Raesin 21

Wednesday 13 March 2013 13:42

People don't need to be told how to have sex. It's an instinct that comes naturally, we never would've got out of the caveman era otherwise, or even into it tbh.

Bakarra 22

Wednesday 13 March 2013 10:13

I figured 7s comment would get moderated for sounding like "not an fml" but who knows?

amifaiyaz 12

Wednesday 13 March 2013 12:07

well, are you?

bowtiesarentcool 3

Wednesday 13 March 2013 12:56

How is that an fml? It's a joke, and a funny one at that. Everyone's so sensitive now that you can't even sneeze wrong near them without them crying online about it.