Sex and Intimacy: Instructions

Instructions

By Anonymous - 31/03/2009 05:40 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "What do I do now?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 143 574

You deserved it 16 446

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Same thing different taste

Waste

By Annie - 31/08/2011 03:17 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 819

You deserved it 5 301

Follow the script

By ufhdafuhds - 19/03/2009 23:31 - Egypt

Today, I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pocket. Turns out he'd written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 139 397

You deserved it 14 503

Like a virgin

By chchboy - 22/05/2012 05:05 - United States

Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 153

You deserved it 7 122

By Anonymous - 15/01/2013 17:45 - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 792

You deserved it 6 662

By Confused - 22/08/2012 16:33 - Spain - Madrid

Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 771

You deserved it 4 419

By disapointed girl - 28/12/2009 16:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 015

You deserved it 5 893

Congrats

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 22:44 - Canada - Rosetown

Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 822

You deserved it 8 593

What is it?

By Anonymous - 06/08/2009 22:46 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 191

You deserved it 8 221

By petpeeeve - 11/03/2009 02:53 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time in our relationship and it was great. He drove me back to my house and walked me to the door, then instead of kissing me goodbye he patted me on the back. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 113 898

You deserved it 10 285

First time?

By Anonymous - 29/11/2013 11:56 - United States - Westminster

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 289

You deserved it 6 901

sLap_fml 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 16:09

i definitely don't think that's a fml, i think that's rather cute. he wasn't scared to say that he had no idea what to do, which means he obviously wanted to please you since he was asking you what to do.

LyuboLove 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 16:01

lol that would so be me on my first time although that's why we have the internet.... it helps a lot haha

Comments

wickedlove 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 20:51

Um, believe it or not, there ARE people who don't watch ****.

InsanePlagued 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 20:56

lol total mood kill, eh?

cthulhu1138 1

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:05

Was he one of those sheltered religious types who get sent to Jesus camp if they so much as think of watching ****?

5bye7 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:14

never ever say someone "entered you"

sugarninja23 2

Wednesday 8 January 2014 16:58

enter me !!!

beyondperception 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:14

Damn, that sucks for you. I was almost expecting this to happen to me, but thankfully it didn't. Wow, FYL.

Treehugger 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:19

that's not a FML; that's cute. but ty for sharing aneways. did he at least get the hang of it afterwards? lol

sleepless15_p 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:20

That sucks for him. It is his first time. Give him a break. Do not ruin it for him. You should be happy that he trusted you enough to ask rather then do something stupid or not have sex at all. I think it would be cute if a girl asked me "what now?"

ameliastanford 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:25

That is so cute! It reminds me of my first time, except i knew even less. haha.. Good on ya, good luck to you guys! xo

hinice 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:49

Well, I'm not saying he should have known ALL the tricks to sex but it's a natural instinct to know the basics, like in and out. I don't know, just sayin'.