Family, Awkward and Miscellaneous: Mortifying

Mortifying

By whatashame - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my dad was on the couch and I sat down next to him. As I was reading a text message, I saw my dad's fat stomach sticking out so I patted it. After the first two pats, I realized I was patting in the wrong place. I patted the family jewels. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 557

You deserved it 80 740

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Same thing different taste

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I agree, your life sucks 18 009

You deserved it 54 701

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By fml - 03/09/2013 06:31 - Canada - Vancouver

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I agree, your life sucks 55 531

You deserved it 12 104

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Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 246

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By Fatty - 27/12/2009 07:15 - United States

Today, the guy I've had a crush on came over to my house. My Dad came in to see how we we're doing, looks at me and says "Man... You've REALLY been puttin' on the pounds!", pokes me in the stomach a few times, and leaves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 502

You deserved it 4 177

PlasticShark 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 12:31

YDI for even wanting to pat the belly in the first place... that's just... disturbing... =

sarah8909 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 12:30

So the jewels were sticking out where you were patting or you just didn't bother looking and decided to pat him in that general area? YDI

Comments

greedy_dead_soul 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 22:21

He enjoyed it.

musicloverr 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 22:25

ooohh GROSS

caitie 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 22:27

umm..why did you want to pat his stomach in the first place?

imhawaiian 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 22:27

thats not bad atleast you didn't touch him in the balls or anything... just kidding but seriously.. awkward

xMooMoox 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 22:33

You thought it was his stomach sticking out, but it was his penis. So he had an erection on the couch next to you? Then you proceeded to pat it two times and he didn't stop you after the first? And your name is "whatashame" as in that you didn't get to continue? I can't see why it would be "whatashame" I patted my dads penis instead of his stomach. I would see that as "HowNasty" or "IFeelNasty" or something to that affect. I urge you to seek psychological help as your family has deep problems.