Work: No excuses!

No excuses!

By davka - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 976

You deserved it 4 905

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Top comments

khaya 9

Monday 18 April 2011 19:10

Stab wounds only accepted. Company policy, don't fight it.

cathylee22 4

Monday 18 April 2011 19:11

ummm wow what were you doing the night before that resulted in you being shot?

Comments

jimbob13 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 1:27

why did you get shot? I mean cmon, that's sooo five mins ago xxx

forza_italia88 2

Tuesday 19 April 2011 1:27

you can sue for unfair dismissal..

cherryrune09 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 1:33

I swear companies r firing ppl for no God damn reasons now a days...

viperstrike 5

Tuesday 19 April 2011 2:15

sue for wrongfully being fired

derekahlers 4

Tuesday 19 April 2011 3:00

I would make a case and sue your company for that. but sucks you lost your job

pandasingermany 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 3:09

uggggggh yah it is, sue them or ur lying

cantstandit808 2

Tuesday 19 April 2011 3:13

ho collect unemployment, that will piss them off. You are entitled to collect.

ashleyhaynes 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 3:16

Sue!!

aquariusangel420 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 3:21

WHOEVER SAID THIS WAS A YDI UR A ******* ASSHOLE AND I HOPE THIS HAPPENS TO U

Tahu424 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 3:29

@ #15- Really? I'm pretty sure every other song of his that I've heard is him complaining. Now, Teddy Roosevelt, that's a different story.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 491

You deserved it 15 056

Today, I came out as lesbian and introduced my new girlfriend to my family. My mom angrily told me that I should have waited until my grandparents had died before coming out, and that I was "extremely disrespectful" for making this announcement. I honestly thought everyone would be fine with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 094

You deserved it 1 169

The Top

Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 958

You deserved it 21 612

Today, I asked my husband for help with a household chore. His response was to fake snore and pretend to be asleep. Later, our toddler pulled the exact same BS when I asked him to pick up his toys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 810

You deserved it 267

Today, during parent/teacher conferences, my mom told my Chemistry teacher that I have an intense crush on him. There are still 7 months left in the school year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 822

You deserved it 5 338

Today, I went to a concert for the first time in 5 years. I got all dressed up and even ended up hanging out with the band. The night came to a screeching halt when I got a migraine and ended up in the ER vomiting non-stop. I was in the hospital all night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 954

You deserved it 214

Today, I was talking to my grandmother, who was lying down on the couch under a blanket watching TV. As I was leaving, I said "See you later Nana," and patted her on the shoulder. Her shoulder was soft, and moved more than I expected. It was her boob. I felt up my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 719

You deserved it 12 916

Today, at my job in a pub, I was cleaning the pub garden ready for closedown. There was a girl crouched on the floor under a table. By the time I'd realised what she was doing and turned around, she'd already finished, apologised, and left me to clean up her piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 471

You deserved it 667