Love, Embarrassing and Seduction: Peacocking PUA syndrome

Peacocking PUA syndrome

By hardtoignore - 03/10/2011 01:34 - United States

Today, after reading about seduction techniques, I wore shades and a brightly colored shirt to a club to attract female attention. However, the sunglasses rendered me almost blind, and I tripped over a step, crashed into tables, and thanks to the shirt, everyone saw it happen in glorious technicolor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 240

You deserved it 45 763

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Same thing different taste

Dumbass

By rackman007 - 13/05/2009 23:26 - United States

Today, I was wearing my new sunglasses while watching a basketball game. A pretty hot looking girl was sitting a few spots next to me so I stared at her breasts. A few minutes later, I looked up at her face and she was looking at me in disgust. It turns out that my sunglasses were see through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 276

You deserved it 92 011

By Fuck's sake! - 25/04/2016 01:34 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, it turned out the twit I've been overcharging for drinks in my bar for wearing shades indoors is actually blind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 269

You deserved it 27 366

By Anonymous - 23/12/2009 20:48 - United States

Today, I was telling my entire cocktail party about the time I accidentally flashed my volleyball team at a pool party. While trying to demonstrate how it happened, I accidentally pulled my dress down and flashed everyone again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 742

You deserved it 46 082

Play it cool

By NathanPlays - 23/04/2011 01:39 - United States

Today, a very attractive girl moved in across the road from me. As I was leaving, I noticed she was looking out her window at me. I tried playing it cool, only to end up tripping over my own feet, hands in pocket, and faceplanting the hood of my dad's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 102

You deserved it 20 256

Not my sunnies!

By ladyofzanarkand - 20/05/2020 20:00

Today, while out shopping, a middle aged man snatched my sunglasses off my face, threw them off the ground, and stomped on them, saying, "That’s what you get for trying to look cool, asshole!" I suffer from light-induced migraines. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 479

You deserved it 161

By scumbag i guess - 08/09/2012 00:26 - United States - El Paso

Today, I went out to a club, hoping to score. I'd read about a trick pickup artists use called "negging" and decided to try it out. As I finished complimenting a girl for being brave enough to have not made much of an effort with her makeup, she slammed her knee between my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 895

You deserved it 53 499

By notexactly - 23/04/2009 07:36 - United States

Today, I didn't wear my contacts. Determined to prove to my friends I didn't need them, I read all the signs in sight. I couldn't read a particular one, so I began to walk closer. Suddenly I fell on my face, bruising my cheekbone. The sign said: "Caution: Watch Your Step." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 411

You deserved it 64 209

By Anonymous - 08/02/2010 18:24 - United States

Today, while on my way to the break room, it seemed as if everyone was staring at me and giving me odd looks. I asked my friend, "Did I get prettier overnight or something?" She answered, "No, your shirt is just see-through." FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 552

You deserved it 30 915

By Anonymous - 23/11/2014 01:33 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was at a club and caught a cute guy's eye from across the bar. He smiled at me, got up and came over, then said "Oh shit! You looked way hotter from back there. Damn!" and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 032

You deserved it 3 582

By Anonymous - 26/12/2018 06:00 - Australia

Today, as I walked out of a club, I slipped in my new shoes and spilled my chicken, chips and gravy on my brand new white dress. Not only did people see me do this, but my dress is ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 993

You deserved it 753

Freeze_fml 16

Monday 3 October 2011 8:49

You sure attracted attention.

perdix 29

Monday 3 October 2011 9:06

Which is why you don't. . . *lowers sunglasses* Crash, thud, thud, "watch out, asshole!," Ouch, oof, tinkle, moan, gasp. wear your sunglasses at night.

Comments

DHoffmann 9

Monday 3 October 2011 9:05

Be yourself. You don't have to look like a damn rainbow to be seducive man.

CanWeMicrowaveIt 11

Monday 3 October 2011 9:05

Hmm, sounds like you were reading "How to be a douche-bag" not "Seduction Techniques". Sorry for the mix up OP, both books were for the same audience.

perdix 29

Monday 3 October 2011 9:06

Which is why you don't. . . *lowers sunglasses* Crash, thud, thud, "watch out, asshole!," Ouch, oof, tinkle, moan, gasp. wear your sunglasses at night.

DHoffmann 9

Monday 3 October 2011 9:08

I love your comments.

ShyAnn29 14

Monday 3 October 2011 9:34

LOL!! that's funny!!

perdix 29

Monday 3 October 2011 13:53

Thanks, ShyAnn, I looked at your picture again and realized now that she's face-to-face with the guy. When I first saw it, I thought she was blowing the guy. Is that one of those optical illusions that can be seen in either of two ways as a kind of Rorschach test to decide whether you have a dirty mind? If so, I pass or fail depending on your perspective.