Intimacy: Relax

Relax

By Anonymoosey - 19/02/2012 23:47 - Canada

Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 274

You deserved it 5 328

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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Same thing different taste

Doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo-doo

By Rhett_15 - 01/08/2017 13:00

Today, I found out that my favorite song is about blow jobs and crystal meth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 435

You deserved it 948

Most good songs are

By Cicie - 27/01/2017 03:06 - United States - Weatherford

Today, I discovered that one of my favourite, relatable sad songs is actually a song about gay sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 660

You deserved it 1 922

By nilssonfan - 17/11/2010 08:08 - United States

Today, I bought one of my favorite albums from when I was growing up. When I looked at the liner notes, I learned that my favorite song on the album wasn't about taking a bath, but about going to a brothel. My second-favorite isn't about moving, but about suicide. My childhood just shattered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 854

You deserved it 5 961

Spotified

By aarong - 10/02/2014 06:42 - United States - Tampa

Today, I found my daughter's "sex songs" playlist. I was more disappointed by her poor taste in music than the fact that she is already sexually active. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 524

You deserved it 8 000

Sing it again

By Anonymous - 23/04/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I just learned that the silly song my parents taught me as a small child, and would sometimes make me sing for the family, is actually a very thinly veiled series of penis jokes. Why just now? Because I hadn't thought about it for years, until my grandma brought it up at a reunion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 425

You deserved it 80

By Microtron - 03/03/2015 00:48 - United States - Oxford

Today, a friend sent me a song. I didn't have time to listen to it all, so I listened to the first 30 seconds of it to get a feel for it. It was nice and uplifting, so I sent it to my mom. Turns out, after the first 30 seconds, the singer brightens his day by singing about his enormous penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 216

You deserved it 13 447

Right Said Fred

By Anonymous - 05/09/2019 22:02

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that he should sing the "I'm too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts…" song before we had sex. Now, every time we have sex, that song is going to be in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 2 031

By RollieCollieUSA - 30/01/2009 17:27 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other. Before, I reached over to her computer and put on "Your Body is a Wonderland". Surprisingly, I lasted through the song and didn't realize her iTunes was on random. "Rape Me" by Nirvana came on. I still finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 733

You deserved it 6 669

By tkr - 06/02/2012 03:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that he should sing that song that goes 'I'm too sexy for my shirt' when we have sex. Now, every time that we have sex, that song is going to be stuck in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 938

You deserved it 39 964

Not fair at all

By Anonymous - 28/04/2009 20:52 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend was complaining that we don't have "a song". Irritated, I told her that I'd put on the radio, and whatever song was playing was our song from now on. I switched on the radio, and "It's Not Fair" by Lily Allen was playing. Our song is about premature ejaculation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 346

You deserved it 61 861

KaelaKhaotic 5

Monday 20 February 2012 3:34

What song was it?

bustub2 8

Monday 20 February 2012 3:41

"I'm a Little Teapot" is my guess.

Comments

cheerbabe3254 4

Monday 20 February 2012 3:38

Lol!!! When u were a child u were listening to some very innapropro music!!

Red_Wing_Nut44 14

Monday 20 February 2012 4:38

I'm pretty sure that OP had no clue what the song meant when she was a kid.

ZeroIce 12

Monday 20 February 2012 4:47

Why'd you write the same comment twice? Ita not even funny and innapropro is very stupid in my opinion...

BostonBruinsFan 8

Monday 20 February 2012 5:40

Red Wings SUCK…My team RULES the NHL

loleepops 10

Monday 20 February 2012 7:14

Irony...

zebrapattern 6

Monday 20 February 2012 7:15

What's "innapropro"? I'm sure in the time it took you to type this made-up word, you could have typed out the correct one.

flames57323 11

Monday 20 February 2012 15:54

Nobody will take you seriously...

CDeCam 9

Monday 20 February 2012 3:39

Subliminal messages? And they wonder why the younger generations are so sex-crazed these days

Torva_fml 16

Monday 20 February 2012 5:20

I'm sex-crazed because of music?! I don't even listen to music.. :( I guess I'm just a... God only knows what I am..

AppleCurry 0

Monday 20 February 2012 5:46

How the **** do you not listen to music??

MrsUresti 8

Monday 20 February 2012 3:40

LMAO

bugmenotmofo 34

Monday 20 February 2012 3:42

Relax!!!

iamabamf 17

Monday 20 February 2012 9:25

Don't do it.

drod8287 0

Monday 20 February 2012 9:48

When you want to go through it

WCARlover 34

Monday 20 February 2012 3:42

Must have a good beat, that's all I can say

afunnyterdcody 5

Monday 20 February 2012 6:33

You have got to be one of the hottest other people on facebook

drod8287 0

Monday 20 February 2012 3:43

I think it's Relax (don't do it) by Frankie goes to Hollywood.

biancapaholak 0

Monday 20 February 2012 4:40

That song's about masturbation!

aybaybay94 6

Monday 20 February 2012 10:04

No it's not. It's about delaying ****** so you don't prematurely ejaculate. I wasn't born when the song came out and I know. General knowledge man

swimmersrok 0

Monday 20 February 2012 3:43

Dont u just hate it when that happens! I can totally imagine a six year old singing their heart out about sex. Beautiful.

FlamingTacos 7

Monday 20 February 2012 3:43

Must be a Barney song

jellyD 1

Monday 20 February 2012 3:44

I'd put money on Frankie Goes to Hollywood's "Relax"

Ray_of_midnight 22

Monday 20 February 2012 3:47

First thing I thought of.

FlamingTacos 7

Monday 20 February 2012 3:45

Must be a Barney song

ronski 41

Monday 20 February 2012 12:50

No it's not

toastyumm 1

Monday 20 February 2012 21:40

It's the peanut butter and jelly song :3

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The Top

Today, I’m questioning everything about me. I’ve been in a relationship with the same guy for almost 3 years now, high school sweethearts if you will. Now I’m starting to question if I even like guys. I’ve never gotten off to a guy, but women? I’ve always gotten off to them. My boyfriend is so sweet, I don’t know how to do this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 190

Today, in an incredibly busy shopping center bathroom with my 5 year-old niece, I was squatting over the toilet seat to avoid germs. My niece then says at the top of her voice, "Auntie, why are you sitting like a kangaroo?" I'd say the whole room pissed their pants laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 740

You deserved it 8 427

The Top

Today, my crush took me to a park and told me he loved me. We sat on an old bench and were just about to kiss when I screamed. I now have a huge splinter in my arse and he can't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 565

You deserved it 5 189

Today, my boss told me I was fired 3 weeks ago because there was no money to pay me, meaning that I worked the last three weeks for free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 375

You deserved it 3 054

Today, my ex is calling everyone I know, telling them I ruined her life. I'm not built for serious relationships, I was very open with her about that, the moment stuff gets serious I freak out, yet she chased me at every stage, then blamed me when I couldn't handle her demands for serious commitment, and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 945

You deserved it 490

Today, I drove an hour to a friend's wedding. Realizing I was too early, I sat in my car at a gas station and watched The Office to kill time. I walked in to see the newly married couple escorting the last few rows out. I had been told the wrong time and the wedding was over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 708

You deserved it 6 314

Today, and since yesterday, I've received numerous tearful, and sometimes angry, phone calls from my mom. The calls were not about her health issues, my kids, or even my dad losing his job. No, she was angry-crying about the FBI raid at Trump's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 348

You deserved it 190

Today, I had my car valeted at my hotel. The manager came out, took my keys, and said the car would be waiting for me in an hour. I was then forced to watch from the lobby as the "manager" sped off downtown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 897

You deserved it 6 171

Relax

Same thing different taste

Doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo-doo

Most good songs are

Spotified

Sing it again

Right Said Fred

Not fair at all

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