Spice up your love life

By screwed - 04/11/2012 09:55 - United States

Spicy
Today, my hubby and I decided to spice up our sex life and went to an adult toy store. We know too many people in our town, so we drove to one that was 30 minutes away. We decided on our items, and went to the check out. Who would have guessed my next door neighbor works there as a cashier? FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 754
You deserved it 5 475
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Top comments

DocBastard 38

Oh no! Now your neighbour knows you have a healthy sex life! Whatever will you do? How will you ever live it down? The only solution is to have loud, raucous sex all the time so he knows your purchase was successful.

803 28
n3rdzgotskillz 29

Hey, you only BOUGHT something from a sex shop. They WORK there. I think you're pretty even!

386 3

Comments

laurenlovesjb 20

That's embarrassing, but it's kind of like buying tamping from a hot guy at the grocery store. It may be uncomfortable, but the best thing is to be open about it because everybody does it.

22 27
Dory123 9

I'm sorry but your profile picture is in the way of me thumbing you up.

14 3
mhterp90 17

I know the feeling. I work as a cashier and one day this pretty girl came to my line and all she had was condoms. I didn't even think when I asked of she wanted a bag.

2 0
broim13calm_down 8

ask your neighbor for a discount and say it's for your pets chew toys? (:

5 32
feldco1 17

What if they bought outfits?

4 2
Mioko_fml 6

I think the neighbor knows better since he/she works there. It's normal to have a sex life, no point of making an stupid excuse. Besides... Are you really going to say the ***** and lube is for the dog?

9 0
supportcommand 17

Uhhh ya. These anal beads ARE for my dog. So is this 10" vibrating ejaculating thrusting *****.

5 0
BeforeItWasCool 12

Oh grow up, OP! It's 2012- people have sex. Just carry on as normal. You were having sex before your neighbor found out, carry on as normal now your neighbor knows. It won't make a difference to him/her. S/he sees hundreds of people buying sex toys every day, it's no big deal.

25 6
missamberrose 17

I agree that it is no big deal. I think the point was that they drove 30 minutes out of their way so that they purposely wouldn't run into someone. Some people are just more comfortable with the subject of sex then others are.

12 2
RedPillSucks 31

Also, it's not about having sex, it's about using sex toys. You don't want your neighbor to know that your husband prefers when you use the steely Dan strapon

14 1
BeforeItWasCool 12

I didn't think of it that way, that's a good point!

3 0
Pleonasm 35

I think it's better this way; they know better than most what to suggest to spice up your sex life. "Hey, from the noises she's making that last item I gave you is working pretty well, eh?"

12 4
Czech_Zidane 14

What is the problem? So your neighbor knows that you have sex life, so what? Do you worry that s/he will be envious? :-)

7 1
ambear26 14

How old are you op 16? It's two adults that are married together having sex and getting toys and such to help their sex life and relationship. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. That's a little immature to be embarrassed maybe your neighbor is more understanding.

9 22
zingline89 18

Yes OP is 16 and married, that makes sense. Also, you're only 18 yourself.

3 15
gc327072 30

But they do have a valid point, zingline.

11 1
zingline89 18

I know, her point is valid. I just really hate the "omg how old are you 12??" type comments. This one maybe wasn't as bad, but usually the age of the OP isn't relevant when those comments are made. And this is an example of when their age is irrelevant.

11 7
littlehollycocks 0

24- My aunt got married at 16.. It's not like that never happens. :p

7 0
RedPillSucks 31

Plus, it's a small town. Like it or not, this is the real world and you don't want people knowing your private predilections cause it does affect your life in other ways. Just ask Bill Clinton

3 2
Czech_Zidane 14

Yes, it happens, usually if the two teens do not have a clue or give a damn to contraception :-)

1 3
JustASmallTownBo_fml 7

#76 that's 2 completely different things. First of all, Clinton had an affair. If OP was going to an adult store with Monica lewinski, I can see how OP would be embarrassed. Secondly, he lied under oath. If OP went to an adult store with someone else and tried to deny it to everyone, she would have a negative strike against her reputation. Butcwith herchusband, she shouldn't be embarrassed.

0 0
rocketshock 8

Apparently not you:D Seriously though, you guys are married, your neighbor can infer you have sex. If she makes it weird, that's her problem for choosing to work there.

4 1
yogima 6

Sex is normal. So is experimenting with it. I can't possibly imagine your neighbor thinks it's strange since he or she's the one working there.

8 0
TheJoeydark 4

Neighbors kids: "mommy, daddy what are the weird noises coming from the neighbors house?" Neighbor: "don't worry darling they're just playing games with the new toy they bought"

14 3