Creepy, Creepypasta and Animals: Today, as I was lying on my bed with one of my arms hanging from... - FML

By scared-straight - 27/05/2013 04:05 - United States

Today, as I was lying on my bed with one of my arms hanging from the side, I felt something sniff my hand from underneath. I don't have any pets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 696

You deserved it 4 392

Back to school: Courses and confusion
When the campus comes back to life, anecdotes abound between the lecture halls and student parties! More…

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Same thing different taste

By thatsnotacat - 21/11/2013 17:52 - Australia - West End

Today, I woke up to something tickling me. Thinking it was my cat, I reached under the covers to give her a friendly scratch behind the ears. I imagine the giant spider that was actually there enjoyed my terrified screams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 520

You deserved it 3 357

PANIC

By Anonymous - 29/12/2009 05:11 - United States

Today, I woke up from a nap and thought I felt somebody's arm in my bed. I frantically start hitting it and start screaming. I soon realized it was my own arm. I'd fallen asleep on it, and it was completely numb, I couldn't feel a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 405

You deserved it 11 943

By Anonymous - 11/06/2011 22:36 - United States

Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 262

You deserved it 7 317

By goldenpuppy - 19/05/2016 20:54 - United States - Somerville

Today, I was sitting on my couch when I felt something weird underneath me. I got up, thinking I'd sat on my phone or something. Wrong. I'd sat on a live mouse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 145

You deserved it 1 081

By ambushcat - 06/07/2012 03:31 - United States

Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 509

You deserved it 28 627

Creepy roommates #56

By Anonymous - 16/09/2021 23:00

Today, I awoke to a strange feeling on my feet. It felt like a tongue, so at first thought it was the dog, but we don't have one. I looked down and it was my roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 259

You deserved it 84

By phillyfan4life - 21/02/2011 19:50 - United States

Today, I saw my dog sleeping, so I laid next to her and put her arm around my neck to be cute. Only for her to wake up and bite my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 810

You deserved it 28 464

Rocky VIX

By Anonymous - 29/09/2019 20:06

Today, I was laying with my face dangling down the side of my bed, when my kitten rushed up to me looking worried. He sniffed me for a while, then decided the best thing to do was to stand on his hind legs and start punching my face like a speed bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 355

You deserved it 361

It's Caturday, respect our feline leaders

By believekimber - 09/07/2022 16:00

Today, I was feeding my pets and playing with my puppy when I suddenly felt something behind me. My cat is on the arm of the couch steadily spanking my butt with his paw. I can't win! FML

I agree, your life sucks 606

You deserved it 269

By ashleyramsay - 23/10/2009 19:13 - Canada

Today, I heard whimpering while I was in my bedroom. Thinking it was my parents doing something nasty, I let them do it and turned on my music. My parents came home from work and I realised they were never home. I went into the room and saw my dead dog laying on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 699

You deserved it 11 812

Next

Top comments

enamis 3

Monday 27 May 2013 12:07

Well, what was it!? You can't just leave us hanging!

TheCamoWulf 17

Monday 27 May 2013 12:06

You either have a ghost of a decease animal or you have a weird burglar.

Comments

mimaayyy 7

Tuesday 28 May 2013 9:50

that reminds me of that creepy story about a murderous clown under the bed licking your hand

icepick23 12

Tuesday 28 May 2013 16:22

Maybe it was your ex?

amberbelle 14

Wednesday 29 May 2013 8:40

you do now.

secret_ninja_gal 12

Wednesday 29 May 2013 12:32

that is the scariest thing ever.

AkiChan_fml 7

Wednesday 29 May 2013 15:16

*sing song voice* Somebody's got a stalker~~~~!

reflexion213 11

Wednesday 29 May 2013 18:05

Burn the house down!

theworldismad 10

Thursday 30 May 2013 5:36

maybe it's Taylor swift. she's after everyone nowadays

Mic0lynn 6

Friday 31 May 2013 11:43

Possibly your range of pets is limited.

oOBulletlaggg 0

Saturday 1 June 2013 9:35

Thinking about it, couldn't you tell how big whatever it was by how long it took for each sniff? An example being a rat would have a lighter and quicker sniff as in turn a cats would be a little slower and heavier?

PureEvil666 3

Tuesday 4 June 2013 0:19

Rats.

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The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 410

You deserved it 15 012

Today, my new neighbor asked if I could keep my dog from yapping during the evenings, because it kept him awake last night. I don't have a dog, but I apologized anyway. I didn't have the heart to admit that those are the sounds my girlfriend makes during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 020

You deserved it 8 493

The Top

Today, my dad confessed that the only reason I'm alive today is because he couldn't afford to pay for an abortion. He couldn't afford it because he'd splashed out on brand new furniture at IKEA shortly before discovering my mom was pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 071

You deserved it 2 954

Today, I found out that being rhythmically challenged really really sucks. I was trying to dance around sexily for my girlfriend, and I was doing that one move where you thrust your pelvis forward, and swing you hand from side to side. I hit myself in the nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 758

You deserved it 26 662

Today, my girlfriend's mother is more into me than she is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 475

You deserved it 2 254

Today I ran across the street to help a woman who had fallen off her bicycle. While running, I tripped and broke my arm. Surgery is needed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 813

You deserved it 148

Where did it all go? ?

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 79

Today, my boyfriend of 6 years broke up with me. That would have been fine, if we hadn't just moved in with his mother a week ago to save money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 661

You deserved it 2 085