Love: Today, I got all dressed up to go on a date with a guy. Upon...

By wowohwow - 23/06/2011 04:24 - United States

Today, I got all dressed up to go on a date with a guy. Upon getting to my house to pick me up, he told me he'd forgot to put on mascara, and asked if he could borrow some. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 156

You deserved it 6 174

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By workinggirl - 07/03/2010 17:38 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I met at a masquerade. The moment he saw me without my mask on, he left the date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 372

You deserved it 3 563

By bigmistake - 24/12/2011 03:22 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for a while. I shaved my legs and armpits and wore a short dress. It wasn't until I got to the meeting that I noticed I only shaved one of my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 129

You deserved it 17 969

First and last date

By hairless by death - 13/08/2013 16:07 - United States - Santa Rosa

Today, I went on a date with a guy I really liked. The date was going great until he decided to try flossing his teeth with my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 285

You deserved it 4 241

Overenthusiastic

By Sash - 06/04/2012 21:04 - United Kingdom

Today, I dressed up for a date. After waiting for hours, sending countless texts and voice mails to my date, and thinking I'd been stood up, I remembered my date is actually scheduled for tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 620

You deserved it 38 368

By kam3221 - 01/05/2009 04:33 - United States

Today, I got in the shower, washed my hair and shaved because I wanted to look great for a big date. I got out, brushed and dried my hair and spent an hour putting it up in the perfect hairstyle. Running late, I quickly put on my new dress, looked down and realized i had only shaved one leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 876

You deserved it 54 265

By deewe - 13/05/2012 06:06 - United States - Ann Arbor

Today, I planned to go on a date with a man I met online. He came to my apartment to pick me up, and I told him I'd be right out as I grabbed my purse. When I got outside, he was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 315

You deserved it 4 381

Not a good look

By Gloria - 13/03/2023 00:00

Today, date night with my boyfriend. I had my makeup done, fake lashes, etc. He was staring at me and I’m thought, "Oh, he loves how my eyes look" so I started flirting a lot, fluttering my lashes. We then took a pic and saw my lashes were falling, so I asked, ”Were they like that the whole night?” He replied, “Yeah, it looked weird.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 462

Running late

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I woke up very excited because I was going on my first date with this guy I really liked. I dressed very nicely and went to where we were supposed to meet. I waited for about 2 hours. I called him to ask him where he was. He got angry because he was still sleeping and I woke him up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 152

You deserved it 3 877

By cheesfactor - 19/05/2012 19:50 - Bulgaria - Rousse

Today, my wardrobe door jammed, and I couldn't change out into some nice clothes for my date. On the way there, my car broke down. Not wanting to be late and make a bad impression, I scuttled the rest of the way, only to find I'd been stood up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 952

You deserved it 2 377

Profile pictures

By Anonymous - 21/06/2024 00:00 - United States - Macon

Today, I went on an online date. I'd spent a while getting ready and making sure I looked good. When I arrived at the café, I saw my date and approached with a smile. He stood up, looked me over, and said, "Oh, I thought you were your profile picture’s friend." Then left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 252

GigaPudding_fml 24

Thursday 23 June 2011 11:58

Look at it at the bright side! you never have to bring make-up to his house! :)

Jrefinne 7

Thursday 23 June 2011 11:55

Aww, how brave of him.

Comments

Fortitudine 3

Friday 24 June 2011 10:25

Yes, how brave. Maybe he just likes to make his eyelashes pop out more to make them prettier to make you swoon.... Some guys need to do that

LOLLOSERRR 0

Friday 24 June 2011 11:29

I agree your life really really sucks

fogrunner 13

Friday 24 June 2011 13:30

Search Youtube for "trent reznor roskilde 2000." Hawt as ****. :D

Superbarrelroll 0

Friday 24 June 2011 17:20

This is what happens when you decide to hook up with Edward Cullen.

MMMMMMPorkchops 1

Friday 24 June 2011 19:17

that's awful. men are not meant to wear make-up, skinny jeans or product in their hair. By the way, how is Key West this time of year?

ellelovescarlo 0

Friday 24 June 2011 19:38

wtf...

ithinkidiedtoday 0

Friday 24 June 2011 21:25

Gag me . Guys in make up, is like guys in skinny jeans . Do you like guys in girl pants ? I mean, what if you wore the same pants one day ?

MissAwesomeness 4

Saturday 25 June 2011 0:21

I'd question how she got that impression in the first place. sounds like someone is talking smack.

budd28 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 0:44

he's kinda weird

Trencher21 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 4:01

emo? hopefully or that would just be weird

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird Dating AITA Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight

The Top

Today, my mom has officially lost 100 pounds due to a lap-band surgery. After sharing her excitement, she also shared her troubles. She said, "Everything hangs now, even my cooter. Can they fix that?" Thank you for the mental image, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 540

You deserved it 1 905

Today, I have a stutter that gets worse with stress. We got a new supervisor today and the first thing she said to me was, “Either spit it out or write it in an email, for fuck's sake!” I’m now so scared of her, I go almost mute if we’re in the same room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 533

You deserved it 93

The Top

Today, I'm pregnant and feeling awful due to all-day-long morning sickness. My doctor suggested that I cancel all my social plans to be able to keep working. My doctor is also my husband, and the father of this child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 822

You deserved it 250

Today, I asked out this girl I've been spending a lot of time with lately. She told me she was only hanging out with me because she thought I was gay and wouldn't try to get in her pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 499

You deserved it 4 908

Today, like every day she works, my roommate once again put on a ton on perfume before work because she doesn't shower. She's gone, but this smell will be here for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 561

You deserved it 251

Today, a council worker showed up on my doorstep for the final pool installation inspection, which was scheduled 10 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 755

You deserved it 2 446

Today, I faked a burglar alarm to see what my sleeping husband would do. The instant he thought a burglar was in the house, I thought he'd yell out for me and come looking. Nope, he yelled out for his limited edition Air Jordans, and ran into his office to check if any were missing. Priorities, I suppose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 517

You deserved it 1 015

Today, at a baseball game, I smiled and waved at the little girl in front of me. She cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 836

You deserved it 2 408