Health: Today, I learnt that eating McDonald's, Twisties, chocolate,...

By gymgirl - 05/05/2011 13:47 - Hong Kong

Today, I learnt that eating McDonald's, Twisties, chocolate, and popcorn, then regretting it and going to the gym is a bad idea. I discovered how far vomit, on a moving treadmill, can be thrown across a room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 565

You deserved it 48 213

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Same thing different taste

Food ****

By Anonymous - 11/06/2021 22:01

Today, I decided to start eating healthier, so I had fruit and yoghurt for breakfast and a chicken salad for lunch. My stomach violently rejected both meals in a fountain of vomit. I later ate a giant McDonald’s meal with no issue, and felt loads better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 828

You deserved it 340

McGastric

By Mc'xplosive - 09/10/2019 04:00

Today, after months of avoiding fast food, I decided to eat some McDonald's french fries. Though the fries were delicious, they were not worth the agonizing 15 minutes I spent on the toilet afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 326

You deserved it 471

By Somethingswrongwiththispic - 05/08/2010 08:17 - United States

Today, I was watching this show about fat people. I was wondering how people could let this happen to themselves. Then I looked down and saw a giant bowl of popcorn, ice cream, potato chips, and soda. I thus figured out how people do this to themselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 200

You deserved it 46 988

Geometry

By sickpuppy - 08/09/2019 12:00

Today, I learned the hard way that when sick, throw up, then have diarrhea. Not the other way round. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 425

You deserved it 173

Out of shape

By Anonymous - 20/08/2023 12:00 - Australia

Today, I was feeling really good about going to the gym for the first time. That was until I got so worn out from my “warm up” on the treadmill that I had to go home and spew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 579

You deserved it 159

Let it all out

By Vomitron - 02/04/2021 00:30

Today, I spent an hour and twenty minutes throwing up at a toilet from a shopping mall because I ate rotten food without realizing it. At least during that time I made two new friends, a gay couple who were making out in the next toilet cubicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 903

You deserved it 124

By teachingsucks - 14/03/2010 18:29 - United States

Today, after a horrible day at school, I went through the McDonald's drive thru for an ice cream cone. Everything went well until I had to pull a sharp turn. The ice cream is now no longer on the cone, but instead all over my hands, face, steering wheel, and the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 769

You deserved it 25 070

Willpower

By Anonymous - 11/09/2019 14:00

Today, I started my new health kick with granola for breakfast, salad for lunch, and hitting the gym after work. I was so proud of myself, until I couldn’t take it anymore and binged at McDonald’s. My health kick lasted 11 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 782

You deserved it 1 782

By TLJ321 - 18/05/2012 07:41

Today, I tried to swallow a spoonful of cinnamon. I ended up vomiting chunks of burgers, all while bleeding from the nose and suffering throbbing testicles. I then had to clean it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 613

You deserved it 58 899

By Anonymous - 18/01/2015 16:34 - Ireland

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 968

You deserved it 20 687

ceddyz17 10

Thursday 5 May 2011 19:06

sounds like a feast for a champion

barlessprison 16

Thursday 5 May 2011 19:07

You mean you had to experience it to figure out it was a bad idea?

Comments

bfflrhea 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 20:39

******* dumbass...

lolmyendoff456 7

Thursday 5 May 2011 22:56

wow harsh :

wickedlyevil96 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 20:41

first, its learned. second ur a fat ass for eating that much so pretty much, YDI

instantmusic 4

Thursday 5 May 2011 20:44

Ｇｌａｒｉｎｇ　ＹＤＩ，　ｉｔｓ　ｏｂ

instantmusic 4

Thursday 5 May 2011 20:50

Ｏｄｄ，　ｓｉｔｅ　ｆｒｏｚｅ　ｄｕｒｉｎｇ　ｓｕｂｍｉｔ．　Ｉ　ｆｉｇｕｒｅｄ　ｉｔ　ｗｏｕｌｄ　ｊｕｓｔ　ｋｉｌｌ　ｔｈｅ　ｍｅｓｓａｇｅ　ｉｎｓｔｅａｄ　ｏｆ　ｔｒｕｎｃａｔｉｎｇ　ｉｔ．Ａｎｙｗｈｏ，　Ｇｌａｒｉｎｇ　ＹＤＩ，　ｉｔｓ　ｏｂｖｉｏｕｓｌｙ　ｎｏｔ　ａ　ｇｏｏｄ　ｉｄｅａ　ｔｏ　ｈｉｔ　ｔｈｅ　ｔｒｅｄｍｉｌｌ　ｈａｒｄ　ｏｎ　ａｎ　ｅｍｐｔｙ　ｓｔｏｍａｃｈ．　Ｏｎ　ａ　ｂｒｉｇｈｔｅｒ　ｎｏｔｅ，　ｅｘｐｅｌｌｉｎｇ　ａｌｌ　ｔｈａｔ　ｊｕｎｋ　ｇｉｖｅｓ　ｙｏｕ　ａ　ｃｈａｎｃｅ　ｔｏ　ｒｅｃｏｎｃｉｌｅ　ｙｏｕｒ　ｍｉｓｔａｋｅ　ａｎｄ　ｆｕｌｌ　ｙｏｕｒ　ｇｕｔ　ｗｉｔｈ　ｓｏｍｅｔｈｉｎｇ　ｍｏｒｅ　ｈｅａｌｔｈｙ！

penguinazul 13

Thursday 5 May 2011 20:45

Damn, I'm fat, and I don't eat like that. OP has a problem. *nods*

YayaInLalaLand 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 20:45

The term, "learnt", is very old English. So, in modern times, it would be "Today, I learned...". Maybe OP was trying to sound smart by using it. Who knows. BTW, YDI for eating all the crap, and then deciding it was unhealthy. Fail.

rainport 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 20:48

that sucks you should hav had som patos and milk so it wouldent go as far and wouldent hurt as much

drumchick4ever7 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 20:53

why in the world would you eat all that junk? i say karma got you!!

FMLsOhilarious 6

Thursday 5 May 2011 21:04

Um....yeah. That was dumb of you.

Greenster 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 21:10

Your body rightly expelled all the terrible bulls**t you put in it. If anything, your body should have written this fml for having such a dumb host in the brain.