Intimacy: Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so...

By Anonymous - 25/02/2012 03:07 - United States

Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 078

You deserved it 61 388

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Same thing different taste

By sarajj - 29/03/2013 21:36 - United States - Littleton

Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 689

You deserved it 9 297

Revealing

By kitkat545 - 15/06/2009 23:18 - United States

Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 080

You deserved it 51 001

By Nomoresandwish - 29/11/2009 08:55 - United States

Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 214

You deserved it 13 465

Big kid

By Anonymous - 08/09/2012 14:20 - United States - Rhodes

Today, I told my husband that I'm tired of feeling like his "blow-up doll". His response was to honk my boob and make squeaking noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 388

You deserved it 5 717

By Djcc - 21/02/2012 18:03 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were watching TV, I asked him if he loved me. He turned up the volume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 985

You deserved it 7 113

By Married Life 101 - 16/05/2019 02:41

Today, my husband woke up in the middle of the night feeling frisky. He woke me up, got me all hot and ready to go, then before I could get into position he fell back to sleep, leaving me to fend for myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 557

You deserved it 243

By 404: fuck not given - 23/11/2014 16:34 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 056

You deserved it 5 594

By milked - 27/02/2015 05:28 - United States

Today, as I was about to have sex with my husband, I said I wanted to "spice things up." Apparently, our ideas weren't the same. He yanked my nipples as hard as he could and said, "Yeah, you like that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 424

You deserved it 6 869

The "He's probably thinking of other girls" meme gone wrong

By Anonymous - 25/10/2021 23:00

Today, my insomnia got so bad that I became convinced my husband was having an affair in our bed right next to me. I punched him so hard in the shoulder that he awoke from a sound sleep, farted, and then shook it off and went back to sleep unfazed. I'm so jealous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 422

You deserved it 1 403

Sexy time

By yuckmouth! - 28/11/2022 10:00

Today, having been in a bit of a dry spell, my husband woke up feeling frisky. I was feeling it too, but I asked if he could get up and brush his teeth as I’d already brushed mine and wanted to have some fun. Instead, he stormed off, insisting I'd ruined the mood. Sorry but morning breath is gross. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 053

You deserved it 622

OGReaper 2

Saturday 25 February 2012 6:59

Thats what you get.

kickuwithmyfist 1

Saturday 25 February 2012 7:00

Access denied

Comments

xxenforcerxx 4

Saturday 25 February 2012 14:21

dumb bitch. learn to be a better wife

Scrts 3

Saturday 25 February 2012 14:28

100% deserve it! That killing women phrase: "I have a headache...". Ooooh!

goodgood_fml 5

Saturday 25 February 2012 14:57

Why have you been turning him down so much? Is it because he's a bad screw? If he is, and you haven't discussed this with him it's your fault. You have to tell him what you like. It won't get better until you are more honest. If he's awesome in bed and you're just not feeling it, then divorce him and give him my number. Oh sorry, it's not about me. See your obgyn and see if she can get you some Viagara or a recommendation on what to do. If you don't do something, don't get mad if a juicy cooch snatches your hubby up. Do your job or she will. Much luck.

skodizle29 7

Saturday 25 February 2012 15:09

That's whatchu get

newmandotcom 6

Saturday 25 February 2012 15:10

YDI

gregkingsley 4

Saturday 25 February 2012 15:25

Score 1 for the boys

TheLittleRed 0

Saturday 25 February 2012 15:32

Wow **** him and **** all of you assholes.

Squashamis 1

Monday 27 February 2012 6:29

**** you too bitch :D

Perc_fml 2

Monday 27 February 2012 16:38

You seriously don't understand why the husband would be upset? The wife is demanding that the physical side of their marriage revolve around her. Leaves him high and dry for months and then expects him to jump when she says jump. OP needs to think about the physical side of a relationship more or the husband will start looking elsewhere.