By Anonymous - 02/06/2012 15:16 - United States - Clermont

Spicy
Today, I was given a lapdance by a pregnant stripper. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 988
You deserved it 42 023
Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

cameronman9 2

Does this pregnant stripper happen to be your wife?

363 8
comedybreak 20

This is why safe sex is important Guys, learn. But seriously OP it's your fault for letting her

301 10

Comments

TColby 12

So I take it you don't have a fetish for pregnant women?

41 0
l23VIVE 17

A funny picture pops into my head when i think of that

2 0
BunchieRules 31

95 - Do you mean your funny picture? Because that just popped into my head, and I'm pretty confused now.

1 1
pinkpixie06 11

Hey, she's still gotta pay her bills...

30 3
ecaso 1

How pregnant? Like she let it slip in the pre song chat pregnant or like if she would have made a wrong move you would have broke her water pregnant?

85 0
Harpy20 24

That makes all the difference when it comes to which "goo" ends up on his pants: her's or his. Or both...

12 6
Enslaved 36

Some guys are into that. Huge breast and round curves! And the idea of her being polluted with another man's child! Go figure!

31 4
reddudeover 2

19 - First two things are right. I'll add lactation and I think it has more to do with them not being able to get pregnant. So the guys don't use protection (which is stupid because of std's).

3 1
Sammy_Flowers 0

74-Not all protection protects against STDs

4 10
I_Punch_Babies 7

did something (or someone) fall out while she was dancing?

4 31
Amethyst888 14

No. If that were to have happened the FML would have gone more like this: "Today I was given a lap dance from a pregnant stripper. And she gave birth on top of me. FML"

26 0
evilplatypus 38

61 - I think that would be FML hall of fame material right there.

12 0
Myo_fml 20

It wouldn't be possible. If you haven't noticed, women are in labor for hours, not a few seconds while jiggling around in OP's lap.

6 4
Vaginabutter 15

103 - Apparently you never watched the show "I never knew I was pregnant"!

12 0
mhopper 13

112, that show gives me nightmares!!!

1 1
charvisioku 22

"I punch babies" Best username ever xD

2 2
Myo_fml 20

Those women are in labor for extended periods as well, they just don't know what the pain means. I think the show should be renamed "too stupid to realize that my period stopped coming".

7 2
courtneyann211 10

My mom was labor for literally 30 minutes. Not even fully dilated, and contractions 8-10 minutes apart. Same thing with all my aunts. So not all women have a long labor.

4 1
ChazzyWazzy1998 10

160- Some women have regular periods all the way through a pregnancy, it's rare, but it happens.

0 0
CaroAurelia 12

It wasn't uncommon for my mum to miss a couple of months of periods at a time because they were so light, so she didn't realize she was pregnant with me until five months. (She also didn't have morning sickness or anything like that.) I feel like after that, though, you start to notice something is up.

0 0
ICastillo 24

At least you didn't go on C-section Tuesday's. Let me tell you what that is not the strip clubs A squad.

11 3
ICastillo 24

Na but I've seen a pregnant stripper dance hahaha

1 9
HotelGuy 10

Dude be happy you technically got a second lap dance for free

3 7
Vaginabutter 15

From a minor you pedobear!

7 1
GothicAngel17 24

Vaginabutter. That username made my day.

1 1