By luvonsarah - 14/08/2012 17:27 - United States - Beaverton
luvonsarah tells us more.
Hey there! I am the OP. A few things I'd like to address: I was only visiting my parents. I do have my own place. I stayed out a little later than I thought I would and they got worried. The bar (in which we were drinking) is in the same parking lot as Safeway. We stepped out to grab some vitamin water and smoke a cigarette.
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Move out of your parents' house. Now.
In my head the part when you said 'now' I pictured the person in your profile picture saying it.
You're 24 and still live at home, YDI
There's nothing wrong with living at home at that age. I moved out at 23. I lived with them because it made sense financially. I have a lot of friends who did the same. People are moving back IN to their parent's because they can't afford the cost of living.
I could have lived with my parents to save money, but do none of these people consider the burden on their parents? My family is not well-off and the extra money in utilities and food would have been a serious strain on my folks. If your parents are rich, then great. But what about their privacy? I know most parents look forward to their kids moving out so they can spend more time with each other or on their personal goals. Ever ask how they feel about it? Maybe they make a lot of rules and become pains in your ass to encourage you to spread your wings and fly, as it were. Get a crappy job, rent a cheap shit-hole apartment, and learn how bad life sucks from first-hand experience. It makes you better prepared in the long run for when times get rough.
My parents are the exception.. They like to drink and have fun... I had a seizure when I was 18, so they'd rather have me stay here and be safe until I'm ready to move out. I understand it's a pain in the ass sometimes, but overall, i do all the regular things a house owner does. I pay rent and do chores and they provide the food and utilities. We get along just great actually.. My goal is to move out by the end of the year with a roommate or two. I'm excited!
29, and 85, People bumming off their parents voting you down. Personally, I think it's ok to live with your parents if you're still in school or if you lost your job or something, but if you CAN move out, you should. I think "saving money" is a lame excuse for living with your parents. Parents could use that same excuse for kicking their kids out.
Saving money does not = not being able to afford to move out. I'm talking about people who say, "I could move out, but then I couldn't afford (place frivolity here.)" If you can't afford your own place then you should be trying to get a better job or be looking into moving somewhere that's cheaper to live. In the meantime, if you don't make enough money for your own place, then you don't make enough money for your own place.
128, Oh YOU think it's a lame reason, well by all means lets have everyone accommodate your expectations of things that don't concern you. We all know how important it is that everyone lives by the same rules as you. 85, Just because your parents were unhappy with you staying at home doesn't mean everyones family operates the same way. And I don't see how it better prepares you for anything, since if you move out earlier your chances of ending up back in that shitty situation will increase because guess who doesn't have the financial backing that comes from having stayed at home longer...? Oh right... OP, If you want to live at home for whatever reason and your family is OK with that then go for it. It's your life and **** anyone who says otherwise. And no, I don't live with my parents.
Wow. Thumbed down because I think people should do their best to be independent. *eye roll*
Yes, since you believe it can only be done your way.
Downtime, I've noticed you pretty consistently reply to my comments, and you're always picking a fight. What's with the hostility?
BTW, I was just stating my opinion, as I always am, and as everyone else does on this site. And no, I don't expect people to move out of their parent's house because I think it's a good idea, but because they want to be independent and responsible for themselves. Seriously, man, if you can't handle the fact that someone in the world disagrees with you, you need to stop using the internet, watching tv, listening to the radio, etc. Now get your panties out of that wad and be on with your day.
Good advice, 160. It seems like Downtime just logs onto FML to troll. I also love his personality profile.
158, Hmmm, I can't say whether that's true or not, I know I've said something to you before but I don't think I'd been consistently disagreeing with you. If I have its been based on what you say rather than you personally. As for picking a fight, my comments may be harsh but I have no interest what so ever in fighting... 160, That sounds like a great theory, it's good that you've been following my comments but you should really be paying more attention before jumping to such stupid conclusions. 161, What is more independent than saving up, getting a place you own and using it as a foundation to start your own life? How is moving out before you're financially stable at all independent? You will end up running yourself down and relying on others to support you in one way or another.
137/olpally, I'm not sure I follow your logic. If the economy is terrible and the cost of living insanely high where you are, would it not be logical to leave for where the work and cheap living are? Staying at home in such a situation seems like something that would hinder your future and put you years behind on your future career path.
Downtime, I haven't lived with my parents since high school. When I was an OTR driver I visited them on home time, but that was for 3 days a month and I helped with their bills. I'm still stable. I do what I have to to get by, like an adult should. I'm not saying it's wrong to live with parents, just that maybe people should consider the financial burden on them. What saves you money costs them.
204, That doesn't make sense, if you are helping with the bills, buying food, paying board etc then you are saving money and they are financially benefiting from it. If they are happy to have you there then it's a no lose situation, as the cost of rent is a fairly large hit to the pocket. The time would be better spent saving money, getting an investment property and becoming securely financially independent. Theres far more to independence than just being on your own.
It's actually more expensive to live on your own in Illinois... That's why I'm moving out with a roommate or two if possible. If I can't, it makes more economical sense to live with the parents and be secure now so I can save and stand on my own two feet in the near future.. My career is just fine.
Actually, that's exactly what independence mean--living life without depending on others. I have had to take crappy jobs I was over-qualified for and hated to put myself through school and pay rent, but I did it on my own. However, I never said it's inexcusable to live with parents. Many parents are perfectly capable and willing to support their kids during early adulthood. I was simply raising the question of how many people are taking advantage of their parents and whether they consider any possible burden on their parents before asking to stay. My parents had my two young siblings to care for and hit a rough spot financially right before I graduated. They would've gladly helped me out, but I never asked because I knew how much strain it would put on them. And I don't think I'm worse off for the struggle. I know life can be hard and that sometimes I have to work that much harder to make it because I've never been given an easy option.
BTW- Illinois ranked 22 overall based on business, industry, economy, education, infrastructure, cost of living, and quality of life in 2011. My state ranked 43. So the economy of your state is not really valid. It costs more to live on your own anywhere than to live with parents or roommates. Not saying you don't have valid reasons or your parents aren't happy to have you at home, just that that specific argument is moot.
Next time, go to a bar. It's probably a lot more fun than spending your time at a parking lot.
Well, don't drink in public next time. Especially not at Safeway.
Hey what's Safeway?
Your 24 drinking in a parking lot. That's humiliating to your parent. You can't drink at someone's house? Sorry YDI.
*you're
My dyslexia thanks you.
I didn't edit in time. Actually it is the right "your" what I said is "your parent" not "you are" parent. You ******* grammar nazi wanna be. Make sure you are right before you go correcting people.
Ah ******* dyslexia I didn't catch the first "your". I apologize you are right. I'm going to crawl in a hole now.
121- No, smart ass. I was referring to the first "your" misspelling. You failed. And I'm Hitler of the Grammar Nazi's.
122- No problem. I wasn't trying to be a grammar Nazi. I was correcting it nicely before anyone else had to be mean.
Nevershoutkendal- Try picking an attitude and sticking to it. Insulting the shit out of her and boasting to be the Hitler of Grammar Nazis in one comment, then being nice and saying you weren't meaning to be a Grammar Nazi in the next is a bit schizophrenic. Oh and the Hitler of Grammar Nazis is Snickerdoodles. I guess you haven't been around here when she was around. ;)
'Today, I was out drinking with some friends in a Safeway parking lot' I clicked Y.D.I at that point. Besides, is drinking in public areas not illegal in the US? I heard that it was. May just have been certain states though.
At least you had a beer can in your hand and not a tampon up your butt.
Get your own ******* place, then maybe you can do your drinking there instead of a grocery store parking lot...honestly.
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Number one: Why were you drinking in a Safeway parking lot?!? Number two: At least he cares about you...?
Time to move out! Think of all the positives, no grounding, no midnight bumps in the night (if you know what I mean) and most importantly no interruptions during happy time. Get a place OP, it will July get better.