Love: Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger...

By davincourt - 29/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Apollo Beach

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 282

You deserved it 3 004

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Same thing different taste

By jeesh - 31/01/2009 11:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 971

You deserved it 89 322

By HaleyIsabelle - 08/03/2010 20:54 - France

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 462

You deserved it 3 712

Ewwwwwww

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 07:35 - Canada

Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 866

You deserved it 4 863

By Anonymous - 28/11/2014 17:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I was locked out of my house. As I was about to knock on the window to ask my girlfriend to let me in, I saw her on the sofa, digging a huge booger out of her nose and eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 350

You deserved it 4 651

By UUUGHHH - 05/02/2016 20:33 - France - Villejuif

Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 170

You deserved it 2 718

By Qwerty - 28/06/2011 16:10 - Australia

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 993

You deserved it 5 285

By btg - 06/02/2010 06:27 - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 276

You deserved it 3 568

By sneezer - 30/12/2008 04:54 - France

Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 175

You deserved it 7 036

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 922

You deserved it 6 674

By B'Dawk - 14/10/2018 13:30

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been putting boogers in my belly button when I don't pay attention to her while we watch tv. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 696

You deserved it 1 694

Grimmerie 31

Monday 30 April 2012 2:44

The most pressing question here is: was it yours or hers?

HonestTruth 5

Monday 30 April 2012 2:46

You should do the same to her and if she likes it, she has a booger fetish.

Comments

molliepop19 5

Monday 30 April 2012 4:36

That is such a turn on. -_-

happymom2g 0

Monday 30 April 2012 4:37

Chase?

theonlysweetpea 10

Monday 30 April 2012 4:45

Leave her. I'm not even joking.

llamafish 25

Monday 30 April 2012 5:05

I took a screenshot of the 666 comments. I have no life, apparently.

asherm 15

Monday 30 April 2012 5:10

Should have kissed her after

katcot99 11

Monday 30 April 2012 5:36

Most of the other times people say to break up with them is not the right way to go, but I have to say, this one may be a good enough reason to..

babyzann 0

Monday 30 April 2012 5:41

You should start looking for a gf with better hygiene.

pokefan813 16

Monday 30 April 2012 5:45

That's very sexy of her.

muFilter 19

Monday 30 April 2012 5:48

FML. noun eff-em-el A website that teaches you to appreciate your significant other in contrast to the absolute freaks you could be waking up to every morning.

LoganBurrito 6

Monday 30 April 2012 6:34

Perfect Gurren Lagaan moment if it happens again: Her: "Eat THIS!" You: "NEVERRRRRR!"

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The Top

Today, I was about to leave for my honeymoon with my new husband, when he saw my deodorant in my bag. He picked it up and asked what it was. When I said it was deodorant, he gave me a confused look and said, "Girls don't wear deodorant." He actually believed that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 352

You deserved it 3 008

Today, I took my girlfriend out to Outback Steakhouse. We went to one outside of town because my wife works at our local one. When we got there, guess who we saw? I forgot she transferred to another location, which just happened to be this one. Goddamit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39

You deserved it 1 298

The Top

Today, I’ve been on the waiting list for therapy for months, after years and years of childhood trauma. I’m haunted daily by the memories of what happened and I’m still no closer to the top of the list. I’m broken inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 118

Today, I angrily tweeted about having fruitlessly searched for over an hour for my car keys. Minutes later, some guy told me to check beneath the "stack of skid-marked underwear" on my bedroom floor. I'm not sure if it was a lucky guess, or if I should start carrying mace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 965

You deserved it 6 650

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. You would think he could at least spell my name right while ending our relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 543

You deserved it 3 826

Today, a coyote turned up in the yard where my son and his friend were playing. It was aggressive and foaming at the mouth, so I called the boys inside, and shot it. Now my wife is scared of me and half the neighborhood wants me gone for "dangerous behavior." FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 137

Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 950

You deserved it 3 440

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 304

You deserved it 10 562

Same thing different taste

Ewwwwwww

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