Love: Today, just after waking up, I caught a glimpse of my girlfriend...

By Harry Dare - 02/09/2011 16:31 - United Kingdom

Today, just after waking up, I caught a glimpse of my girlfriend in the mirror. Not knowing I was awake, she sniffed at her armpits, started gagging, then quietly came back to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 993

You deserved it 4 322

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Same thing different taste

By hotboxed - 13/07/2019 18:30

Today, while we were sleeping, my girlfriend and I rolled to opposite sides of the bed. When I woke up, I moved closer and wrapped my arm around her. Her response was to fart in her sleep, resulting in a smell so noxious that I had no choice but to roll back to the other side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 611

You deserved it 393

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 112

You deserved it 41 514

By jimbop - 23/05/2009 17:48 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 919

You deserved it 10 325

By pikachu - 20/01/2009 20:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 580

You deserved it 4 540

By allgassedout - 04/01/2015 00:23 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 397

You deserved it 7 347

By Gas-pingForAir - 19/09/2016 08:59 - United States - Columbia

Today, my girlfriend managed to trap a fart in her nightgown and carry it all the way from the bathroom, into our bedroom, and finally into our bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 788

You deserved it 1 670

Ouch!

By P0wned - 29/09/2009 21:21 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 981

You deserved it 5 274

Creeped out

By HadToApologize - 03/11/2009 05:20 - United States

Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 379

You deserved it 23 084

Dirty sex

By Anonymous - 20/11/2022 06:00 - Canada - Burlington

Today, I was in my girlfriend's room when she walked in after getting out of the shower, wearing just a towel. She removed it and I was inches away from going down on her when I noticed she hadn’t wiped properly, either before or after her shower. She'd complained about stomach problems earlier, but regardless… FML

I agree, your life sucks 951

You deserved it 127

Really heavy sleeper

By Anonymous - 17/12/2021 01:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend revealed that last night she decided to 'test how asleep I was' by putting her finger up my nose as far as she could. Then in my mouth. Then in my ear. Then back in my mouth. I slept through the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 144

ThatGenericGuy 6

Friday 2 September 2011 23:44

Admit it, that turned you on.

enonymous 8

Friday 2 September 2011 23:48

She probably has to put up with your Dutch ovens. Only fair

Comments

LegitMaddie 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 5:27

Got B.O get D.O!!

Lovesglee 3

Saturday 3 September 2011 5:30

I didnt think u were awake...

Sabraynay 10

Saturday 3 September 2011 5:55

Sexy.

Snookie85 19

Saturday 3 September 2011 5:59

what an awesome turn on! lol

butterflyz1961 2

Saturday 3 September 2011 6:00

And then the two of you made love.

BiancaW 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 7:10

I would have asked her if she was going to shower or at least wash her pits. I wouldn't want her stank on my sheets. Js.

bigguy123456 2

Saturday 3 September 2011 7:52

Does she not know what ladies speedstick is??

marpay 11

Saturday 3 September 2011 14:16

It's called speed stick it's not expensive.

bigguy123456 2

Saturday 3 September 2011 17:15

Exactly:) so she has no reason not to use deoderent:P

muffinbuttman 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 8:14

If you think she smells bad jump in the shower and give her a hand XD

Tyger44 1

Saturday 3 September 2011 8:23

Dear OP's GF, Your BF is a douche bag.dump him.find someone who actually cares about you. . This should be the other way arnd. Today,my bf saw me having a private moment&he posted that on fml,fml.