Miscellaneous: Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of...

By Elisa_LmR - 03/01/2014 23:28 - France

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 548

You deserved it 8 630

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Same thing different taste

By Twomanybananas - 23/01/2017 16:00

Today, I found a banana on my bed. It was black and shriveled because I accidentally left it there after I thought I finished the whole bushel I bought last week. I've been sleeping in my bed all week and didn't notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 614

You deserved it 3 885

By aelia_oups - 31/12/2012 22:09 - France - Taverny

Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 334

You deserved it 7 539

Why so serious?

By DwarfFrog - 18/06/2012 11:38 - United States

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 442

You deserved it 3 390

By Anonymous - 30/01/2010 13:16 - United States

Today, I was walking to school. When I was about halfway there, someone put a gun to the back of my head and told me to give him all my money. As I slowly turned around, I saw it was my dad putting a banana to my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 426

You deserved it 5 579

By Operation Yewtree here I come - 26/09/2014 20:40 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 368

You deserved it 4 214

Meme life

By Anonymous - 02/02/2023 22:00

Today, I tripped on an actual banana peel and fell over in front of my crush. I'm pretty sure that's the closest I'll ever come to being a meme. FML

I agree, your life sucks 664

You deserved it 143

By Anonymous - 29/04/2012 09:45 - Canada - Thompson

Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 331

You deserved it 22 268

By Jaws - 10/02/2011 16:09 - France

Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 776

You deserved it 38 591

Face Your Fears

By Broc'n dreams - 06/02/2017 16:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I woke up screaming "FUCK OFF!" because I had a dream that someone threw broccoli through my window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 520

You deserved it 784

By Anonymous - 19/11/2017 01:30

Today, I actually slipped on a banana peel, cartoon-style, breaking my kneecap and dislocating my hip. I will never hear the end of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 124

You deserved it 364

rockne93 17

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:25

Orange you glad you aren't afraid of bananas, guys?

WFFLPWND 10

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:25

You must peel very bad... (I'm so sorry I have to)

Comments

olpally 32

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:40

You should eat a banana. Nothing like just facing your fears.

hulopro 16

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:42

Did you surrender to the bananas by any chance?

buckdharma 37

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:46

When a bunch of bananas attack me, ice cream! Then they split.

mwali02 32

Sunday 31 January 2016 2:54

Nicely done. :)

Effinusername 7

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:49

Isnt there an episode of "Suite Life on Deck" where Zack is afraid of bananas or something?

Luigi2012SM64DS 6

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:53

I know your pain. Phobias suck. Do you know why you are afraid of bananas? Or is it just some sort of psycological thing.

glabberfasted 16

Saturday 4 January 2014 11:58

All phobias are psychological :)

Curlytwirly22 17

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:56

That's kinda funny...no offense

Raging_hamster 5

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:58

I don't know why this amazed me so much.

zandalee 19

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:59

Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

Dinoporeon 9

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:59

All the good banana jokes have already been used. So I'm going to make like a banana and split.

shaytards_fml 9

Saturday 4 January 2014 6:03

oh nanana what's my name

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 538

You deserved it 10 056

Today, my husband has been out partying all night. While my in-laws didn't ask him a single question, earlier I received more than six calls from them about when I'll be home to cook and clean. Where was I? In the office for the first time after working from home for past 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 058

You deserved it 111

The Top

Today, someone stole my laptop from my car. However, they were nice enough to relock the doors after they smashed in the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 040

You deserved it 6 092

Today, my wife of three years asked me to meet her for lunch at Subway. When I arrived, she was standing in the parking lot. She handed me a footlong sub, said "I got you a turkey sandwich" and followed it up with "And I'm leaving you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 157

You deserved it 5 244

Today, the "man cold" has infected my brother. He honestly thinks he's dying. He only has the sniffles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 143

You deserved it 3 651

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I get along with her mother just fine. Apparently, it’s not natural for a son-in-law and mother-in-law to get along this well, we should hate each other on principle, so liking each other just fine is somehow majorly suspicious and she can’t trust me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 461

You deserved it 121

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 743

You deserved it 6 397

Today, I tried to surprise my girlfriend with breakfast in bed. Instead, I spilled hot coffee all over her and the bed. We ended up spending the morning doing laundry instead of cuddling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 291

Same thing different taste

Why so serious?

Meme life

Face Your Fears

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