Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend offered a blow job, but my hair got stuck...

By gjh - 19/01/2009 03:20 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend offered a blow job, but my hair got stuck in her braces so instead we tried to pull them all out. And no, I didn't get any. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 871

You deserved it 13 393

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Same thing different taste

By Tyler - 19/11/2011 08:05 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 250

You deserved it 34 503

By Anonymous - 25/11/2017 06:00

Today, I was getting one of the best blow jobs I have ever received. My girlfriend was getting into it when I heard an "uh oh". Her tongue ring got twisted around the hair close to my balls. She started to pull, I started to scream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 011

You deserved it 1 791

By tLee - 19/07/2011 04:04 - Canada

Today, I was laying in bed making out with a girl. After trying to figure out for a while why she was spending so much time on my neck it finally hit me. She was frantically and secretly trying to remove the gum she got stuck in my hair. She failed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 513

You deserved it 4 561

By mortified - 22/01/2011 16:04 - United Kingdom

Today, my dentist pulled a pubic hair out of my braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 482

You deserved it 55 376

By At least she knows I floss - 25/08/2017 14:15 - United States - Pomona

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents and everything was going perfectly. He and I even had some time alone upstairs, where I gave him a blowjob. After dinner, his mom helpfully pointed out something stuck in my braces and inspected it for me. It was a pube. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 498

You deserved it 5 316

By nickthetank - 31/12/2011 09:21 - Canada

Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 978

You deserved it 12 243

Dreams can come true

By Anonymous - 19/09/2015 02:08 - United States - Seattle

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she's been avoiding kissing me lately. Apparently she had a dream that one of my teeth caught on her braces, and all of her teeth got pulled out like a string of pearls. It seems unlikely she will be un-scarred any time soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 685

You deserved it 1 717

By Surprisebuttsecks? - 07/12/2011 04:39 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend shoved a Q-tip up my ass while I was brushing my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 310

You deserved it 7 408

By Anonymous - 24/01/2012 20:22 - United States

Today, I didn't have plans on shaving my pubic hair. My girlfriend's braces thought otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 707

You deserved it 40 138

By coop42 - 15/01/2014 19:22 - United States - Hortonville

Today, my boyfriend was playing with my hair, when his hand got caught. He ended up ripping out a handful of hair trying to get it free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 113

You deserved it 6 078

pannap 0

Saturday 21 February 2009 4:50

agreed. trim up!!! you don't like girls with a huge bush do you? neither do girls....

yikes_fyl 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 21:43

yo your hair is too long son! p.s. I would never let a mouth full of metal anywhere near my penis man. imagine getting some skin caught...

Comments

ashley1518 0

Friday 5 February 2010 3:00

SHAVE!!!!!!

xvxblackdahlia 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 3:38

haha. I don't need braces. I have perfectly alined teeth. o. and. shave. hair is gross :p. blah

screwlife23 0

Thursday 25 February 2010 5:15

@45 u love pubes? I'd really like to know if you're a girl or a guy. why do u love them? I personally think they're gross. I'm a girl.

nolasaints 0

Sunday 7 March 2010 23:42

hawt

dontdothatson 0

Friday 19 March 2010 16:24

would have been priceless if you came and then got stuck XDXD

iplaymw2 0

Monday 5 April 2010 4:20

this is an fnl because he didnt get any

Creeping_Shadows 0

Saturday 17 April 2010 3:48

tough luck bro, I've always wondered what it'd be like to get a bj from a chick with braces lol p.s itd be wise to shave

greyy_goooose 11

Monday 14 June 2010 15:33

Yeesssss! Trim It Up Son! Aint Nothing Worse Than A Shit Ton Of Hairr Where You Get Pleasure. Haha. (:

Lololms 1

Friday 25 June 2010 5:46

Dude, y wouldn't you shave, of course that is gonna happen, and duh ur gf won't finish after being embarrassed like that... Could have been easily prevented

CorinnaHEY 6

Monday 28 June 2010 20:34

eww dick grater

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 156

Today, I asked my son to keep my new girlfriend secret from his mom until our divorce was final, and he ran straight to her. She told the judge I was unfaithful and wants more money from our settlement. My son doesn't give a shit about snitching on me, because she's giving him a percentage of the new settlement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 1 841

The Top

Today, my husband was planning on getting me my favorite movie as an anniversary present; I ended up buying it. He had to give me the money and leave because he is severely arachnophobic and couldn't even pick up the box. I have to hide the movie for fear of it being destroyed. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 582

You deserved it 4 272

Today, I went to a bar with two guys I was interested in. The first I'd been trying to go out with all semester. The second I had gone to dinner with and he seemed nice. I was the designated driver. They drank too much and, on the way home, hooked up in the back seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 108 259

You deserved it 17 041

Today, I attended my first day of school 4 days after reconstructive surgery. But no worries: I'm sure my alien-like appearance and 2 hours of Darth Vader style breathing in an otherwise silent test room will make me lots of friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 003

You deserved it 3 629

Today, my mother texted me while I was at work asking me to pick up a door-stopper on my way home. When I asked her why she explained that she and my dad were trying to make love but the dog kept pushing the door open. What an image. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 500

You deserved it 3 733

Today, I found out that my husband and my cat have something in common; they both like to lick themselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 274

You deserved it 2 751

Today, my friend figured out that if you poke my neck I scratch like a dog. She has yet to cease doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 324

You deserved it 801

Same thing different taste

Dreams can come true

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