By Anonymous - 27/10/2013 16:08 - United States - Ballwin

Today, my wife ate nothing all day due to her morning sickness, but I tried to get her to eat something light, for our baby's sake. I brought her a banana. She yelled at me for being a "pervert" and accused me of just wanting to watch her stick a phallic object in her mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks 49 075
You deserved it 5 499
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Top comments

thatonegirlnic 10

If you did this to her, you are bound for the aftermath

143 11

Comments

xSkittle 16

It's the hormones talking, better get used to it

19 5
mangobbler 11

Hormones, the only substance that kills common sense faster than alcohol. Good luck with all this, OP, but in all truth, as pregnancies go, you would probably enjoy some freaky fruit festival going on, as the best option is unavailable. xD

29 2
puppyXluvz123 9

Just peel it and cut it up for her so it's not in that shape. A pretty easy fix. And for people who can't get their minds' out if the gutter, I mean the banana. Not his dick.

47 4
HeyHeyFishFillet 34

Pretty sure the other option would hurt more than just, "a bit."

17 2
buckeye_state 11

It sounds like she's a little magnesium deficient. good luck and congratulations!!

9 3
fakedsincerity 32

reason number 28 for not getting pregnant; crazy hormones.

11 4
Rainhawk94 27

What are the other 27 reasons

4 1
fakedsincerity 32

bravo 45; saved me a lot of time and effort there!

10 2
Nordrag 26

I cant imagine why you would assume negative thumbs 45. that was a well thought out impressive list.

8 2
FerrisCat 7

Also, people just taking liberties and touching the tummy. Never been pregnant but I know plenty of women don't like people just talking up and rubbing the baby bump.

5 1
monnanon 13

i had some random old lady do that to me while i was pregnant. i decided to tell her i was not prgnant but fat and faked getting really upset about her mistake. that was one old lady belly rub too far

3 1
sanecatlady 13

Actually, those are all the reasons I have no desire to have children, either. Except that number 4 would be number one because I'm emetaphobic. :(

0 1
FloMarDee 19

sorry, but it's probably NOT going to get any better... I'm 25 weeks pregnant now and I cried last week because someone ate the last piece of cheese in the fridge...smh, it sux for all involved

18 1
MrSassypants 33

I can just imagine OP trying to find food in his house and of all them can be considered phallic objects. *Rummages through food* "How about this hot dog... that won't do.. this popsicle... no!... umm this cucumber... damn it... this carrot... that won't work... this lolipop... of course not... this corndog... NO!" Then OP screaming: "WHY DO I ONLY HAVE THESE TYPES OF FOOD AVAILABLE!"

33 0
ironichalibut 24

Because his wife is a bubbling pot of hormones that subconsciously bought phallic foods. Edit not being sexist about his wife being the one to buy food, just makin a joke

4 0
amisenho 11

Freud would have a lot to say about the contents of that fridge.

0 1
Enslaved 36

I once challenged serval of my girlfriends to eat a banana in front of their husbands and maintain eye contact the whole time. The ending results were pleasantly surprising for all of them . :P

0 2