Intimacy: Today, we had some family over. A nasty need to wank seized me... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By VIVI - 25/10/2008 16:55

Spicy

Today, we had some family over. A nasty need to wank seized me when I saw her: my 17-year-old cousin. I went to my parents' unoccupied bedroom. My sister's baby walkie-talkie was switched on, and the whole family heard me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 709

You deserved it 122 691

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

doubleohseven 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 15:46

dude... thats disgusting i agree with #5 completely... why would u go into ur parent's room to wank?! of all teh places... your bedroom, bathrooms, you chose you PARENT'S bedroom to wank over your COUSIN. dude, get some therapy...

thegilly06 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 21:05

Dued. You're kind of a sick ****.

Comments

tdawgheath 0

Monday 20 April 2009 22:33

Go jump of a cliff you incest mofo

cy9293 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 15:44

ok so you are a chick masturbating cuz of your 17 year old guy cousin? thats kinda screwed up i hope you are making this whole shit up

COD6MW2 0

Tuesday 27 April 2010 1:56

it said A nasty need to wank seized me when I saw HER : my 17 year old cousin. not him...HER

Orchard 33

Saturday 8 June 2013 7:16

@#59, Reading comprehension fail. -.-

shineyourlight_x 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 9:48

You are disgusting. GROSS.

Specialist112 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 21:45

#s 51 and 52...you guys practice incest much?

PinkFloyd1977 0

Thursday 7 January 2010 6:19

No, they're making a point and proving it. Look at you jumping to insults since you have no evidence or good arguments to bring to the table. Jackass.

bobbt32294 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 2:04

youre a fukin discusting bastard. seriously that is the sickest thing i have herd.

alice77_fml 0

Friday 24 April 2009 0:17

y is his name vivien?? i thought he's a guy....

Aepoch 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 4:39

Oh no, you were attracted to a hot girl. Get over yourself, you ******* retarded pricks. This guy is in the clear.

ftsk_fan_12 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 4:40

uh thats not funny its disgusting.

ftsk_fan_12 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 4:44

oh and #51...thanks for the extra sketchiness the op really didnt go far enough so thank you for filling in that gap =/

shawn_fml 0

Monday 27 April 2009 3:03

was it a guy cousin?

nellie36 0

Sunday 26 June 2011 20:13

no it says when I saw her

nellie36 0

Sunday 26 June 2011 20:15

"when I saw her"

3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12

Keywords

Coworkers Work Cars Animals Dogs Transportation Miscellaneous Photography Art Videos Love Awkward Health Money Scams My ex Sex Family Am I overreacting? Healthy Lifestyle AITA Babies Kids Sleep Mental health Parents Cheating Break-ups Social Media Friends

The Top

Today, as punishment for a prank, my girlfriend has banned all forms of sex, kissing, or touching for the foreseeable future. She’s also started stripping as soon as she gets home and walking around in just her thong, or sometimes even completely naked, just to make my suffering worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 713

You deserved it 2 517

Today, my long distance girlfriend of almost two years broke up with me because I didn't like her drinking and driving. Her reasoning was, "I don't go out that often so what's the problem?" or "I'm safe when I drive drunk." Yeah? How many drunk drivers thought the same then wrapped their car around a tree? FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 91

The Top

Today, I decided to attach fifteen-pound weights to each foot so I could burn some extra calories while shoveling snow. My dad asked me to move one of the cars in the driveway. When I put my foot on the gas pedal, I couldn't take it off. I ended up hitting my sister and knocking her into a snow bank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 023

You deserved it 54 255

Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 522

You deserved it 29 604

Today, I was rushing to get to work on time and grabbed what I thought was my coffee mug. It wasn't until I was in the car that I realized I had grabbed my husband's urinalysis cup. Not quite the morning boost I was expecting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 587

You deserved it 256

Today, after almost 20 years of celibacy, a beautiful young woman surprisingly took interest in me, and we get along great. My close female friend, who I did once have feelings for, but who always made it clear she'd never see me "in that way" is having a full-blown emotional breakdown. Well, according to her husband anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 125

Today, I waved at my crush, but he waved at someone behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 702

You deserved it 112

Today, it's been a year since I've been with my girlfriend, and I think that I hate more things about her than I like. For instance, how she likes to throw furniture at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 094

You deserved it 10 268