Health, Relatable and Intimacy: Vaporeon?

Vaporeon?

By me. - 07/05/2012 20:38 - Canada - Orillia

Today, I got an inconvenient erection while at my girlfriends house, so I tried to think of something stupid to get rid of it. I tried thinking of Pokémon, which actually made me harder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 284

You deserved it 12 182

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Same thing different taste

By shallowvomit1013 - 23/12/2009 01:09 - United States

Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, i started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 038

You deserved it 5 426

By Danny - 28/05/2012 18:02 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 294

You deserved it 5 774

By tigerbyrn - 30/05/2016 15:35 - Canada - Scarborough

Today, as I was about to meet my girlfriend's parents, she thought it would be funny to grab my junk and give me a hard-on right before they walked in. I couldn't hide it quickly enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 064

You deserved it 2 096

By sad-boing - 02/10/2015 21:01 - United Kingdom - Dartford

Today, my hormones are so screwed, I popped a boner at the sight of two grasshoppers mating and had to retire to my room for a wank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 956

You deserved it 6 907

By Sicko - 28/08/2010 23:52 - France

Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching TV and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 959

You deserved it 26 079

Erection for Protection

By zingle af - 26/07/2017 20:00

Today, I realized how sex-deprived I am when the thought of owning condoms gave me a rock-solid erection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 560

You deserved it 634

By Anonymous - 07/06/2013 07:10 - United States - Marion

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 019

You deserved it 70 204

Ostentatious

By dgordo3 - 09/02/2009 01:01 - United States

Today, on my way home from watching a movie with a girl, I began having an erection because I thought I could kiss her goodnight. She dropped me off at home, and with my full blown erection, I walked in front of her car with the headlights on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 425

You deserved it 46 479

By strangely - 25/07/2015 00:12 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 353

You deserved it 6 303

By mavrick127 - 29/09/2016 14:21 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I finally had the chance to have sex with my crush. Too bad I couldn't get an erection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 226

You deserved it 1 787

bob7up 5

Tuesday 8 May 2012 2:00

Tell yourgirlfriend to wear a pikachu costume when your about to have sex. It may help. ;)

redbluegreen 40

Tuesday 8 May 2012 2:01

It is not very effective. OP fainted.

Comments

uberhaxorjames 1

Tuesday 8 May 2012 5:57

You wanna be the very best that no one ever was haha wait you can't be that with a milli meter Peter haha jk sorry op

AnneeSo 6

Tuesday 8 May 2012 6:16

Well, pokemon is awesome! I can't blame you for getting aroused by it.:P

TehBatman 0

Tuesday 8 May 2012 6:36

Metapod! Use harden! It's super effective!

TheBrownBaller 2

Tuesday 8 May 2012 6:38

Gay

kkillaj 5

Tuesday 8 May 2012 6:58

Fukachu I choose you

gparsley 6

Tuesday 8 May 2012 7:55

Ha u like pokemon so much ur hard-on gets worse that's funny dude

Michellec9982 18

Tuesday 8 May 2012 8:12

U should go to comic con..... I'm sure ull have a blast there...

docfan91 0

Tuesday 8 May 2012 8:49

Guess your metapod's harden attack was super effective.

Kog_Hiro 17

Tuesday 8 May 2012 9:19

This may seem a little Farfetch'd, but I was thinking of a film I want to make that will Staryu and Starmie. It begins as I Pikachu under the covers while you Snorlax, then I wake you with my Wigglytuff between your Jigglypuffs. You're a little Krabby at first because your Drowzee, but you start to Lickitung my Ho-Oh until I Squirtle into your Meowth. Its your first time so you can't help but Koffing out the Muk. You're already Weezing, but we're not done yet because my Cubone is still hard as Onix. You then proceed to Rhydon my Lapras like a Horsea, until Abra, Kadabra, Alakazam! I pull out my Weedle just in time to Blastoise all over your Tangela.