You wanker

By Jeremy - 10/05/2009 01:04 - United States

Spicy
Today, my parents hosted a party at our house. After seeing one of the extremely beautiful guests, I went to masturbate in my room. When I was about to finish, my bedroom door opened suddenly. It was my mom showing around 10 party guests that our dog can open doors. FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 301
You deserved it 87 306

Same thing different taste

Top comments

This just in: Locks were around since before the dark ages. OP should investigate further

That's kind of gross...you saw someone then bolted to your room? and 1 and 2, not everyone has locks on doors.

Comments

jcap113 4

way to go #13 ur so right. do u have absolutly no control at all?and even if ur room doesnt have a lock how about using the bathroom if u absolutly have to jack off. tht way u get a modicum of privacy because ur mum prolly wont want to show tht off and people tend to knock before entering a bathroom

you whacked off because you saw an attractive woman? Self-control man!

this has got to be fake, nobody is stupid, horny, and weird enough to be at a party, see someone then rush off to jerk it. If this is true, you ******* deserve.

This seems totally possible, why would it be fake? A lot of people know about FML, so I beleive 10 - I feel like a loser saying this but I have a cat and she can open doors lmao #55 - I feel so bad for whoever has ever been to your house and has gone to the bathroom that is the most stupid thing I've ever heard of. You do it in a Coffee Mug DUH!

Speedyblurr 0

how about you're a creep for fapping just because you happened to see one of your mom's hot friends?

BombayGin 0

Hang in there guy, maybe the beautiful guest liked what she saw and will shoot you an email!

wtf 55... a bathroom sink? It's called the ******* toilet! and OP - its called the ******* bathroom, that one that has a lock on it!

I'm assuming your dog uses his mouth to turn the doorknob to open the door. I hope you atleast washed your hand after touching your doorknob and before wanking off. If you don't have a lock use your boots, sneakers or weights as door stops. Might not keep people totally from opening your door but it'll slow them down some. Otherwise, ********** all the time, that way your mom will learn to knock and probably inspire her to unteach the dog to open doors.

How did this make it through? This exact scenario has been posted before. Laaaaaaaame.