By zztopspinner - 14/03/2012 19:11 - United States

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks 12 710
You deserved it 36 527
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Comments

Telescope 1

You had enough time to catch it but not move your foot? Nice.

21 2
Discombobulated9 12

I'm sorry if my reply annoyed you, but I think a lot of people are guilty for replying to the first comment. My reply was generally still on topic :/

10 25
DocBastard 38

Discombobulated - your comment is a prime example of thread jacking and attention whoring. It isn't "on topic" one bit.

37 13
SkoomaKi 27

Dare I challenge DocBastard? Of course! He was defiantly on topic. He was probably referring to how natural selection is not always best as this FML shows.

11 30
DocBastard 38

He was DEFINITELY (not defiantly) off-topic on the comment to which he replied. If you want to make a new comment related to the FML, then start a new thread rather than threadjacking the first comment just to get near the top. That's attention whoring and nothing more.

41 11
wironandine 8

Bahaha tool. Derp is a 90s word. Why do you talk like everyone else you robot?

1 15
Cinny90 7

DocBastard He was replying to #1 calling OP a derp. He suggested that it was natural selection that only derps get in stupid accidents like this. Hence, he was on topic. Don't try to act like a smartass. It's not very attractive.

35 7
GirlYouNasty 11

#108 Did you just insult DocBastard? Uh-oh...

19 7
Awes0meperson 10

107 - Actually, derp has become pretty popular now. I learned it this year. You need to get out more…

11 2
Cinny90 7

#115 I'm not trying to insult anyone. I'm just stating the obvious.

13 5
LightningCactus 12

This is why people don't fist bump, just look what happened to Snooki.

11 2
effffyourlife_ 0

135 , that just made my year.

0 9
Scarshadow101 6

You may need to go back to Common Sense 101. FYL for ruining an amazing ninja moment.

1 1
failgamer 7

Have you ever heard or seen a stereotype for mentally ill people when they cup their hand and smack the part of the chest over their heart? Well you did that with a knife to your face

12 77
TheDrifter 23

Might not be a good idea to tell op that, they might try it with the knife still in hand.

10 0
failgamer 7

You are probably right, not sure why people would thumb down this comment though

1 18
bryanorange 3

Meh I don't think 4 was all that funny, or funny at all. I have a mentally ill brother but he never does that. Asshole

45 3
R3TROxLOV3 32

I agree with 81, number 4's comment was incredibly insensitive.

18 2
failgamer 7

Notice how i said stereotype dumbass, quit hating on sarcastic joke comments, it isnt there to offend

4 12
br0ccoli 14

Thats what i thought. That's some seriously hardcore fist pumping! "Let us fist pump...to the death!...this is Sparta!!!"

15 0
nofearjenshere 12

Who in their right mind fist pumps with a knife in their hand in the first place? lol. That's just asking for a trip to the ER.

10 1
DeviousAngel 13

I suppose I shouldn't be one to judge, I did step on a knife. Yes. Stepped on it.

4 1
yaoifreak 8

OMGOSH I freaking love the joker I'm now watching dark night and I'm going to watch it again just because of this comment?

4 38
WLCD123 0

"No,but I Know how you got these!"

8 0
sexaybitch 14

#67, why is your nose the profile pic?

1 0
mandadarling 10

Face Chopping Like Champs

26 5
BornToFlyThenDie 0

I think you mean. "Like a boss."

1 27
TomHarrow 5

I think she means "Face Chopping Like Champs".

31 1
DontModMeDammit 10

*quack...quack*..........*boom!*

14 2
rattusrattus 18

Tying a cloth round your neck and jumping off tables and chairs?

8 0
Heinousness 0

Reading FMLs/books/tabloids/ something else even though your in a dangerous place( I know someone like that)

2 0
ChrisTheCalm 9

45- why do people always have to have 'FML' as an example of their idiotic jokes?..

0 11
toenibbler 14

For future reference I suggest you put the knife down first before proceeding into you manic victory dance.

62 0
FMLandurstoo 9

Well that's why they posted it on fml dumbass.

9 1