Health, Dogs and Animals: Instant cure - FML

Instant cure

By Username - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff

Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 579

You deserved it 4 949

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

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Same thing different taste

You played yourself

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Paul

Today, I faked a sore throat for the school nurse so I could go home early. It took my dad the rest of the school day just to get there to pick me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 104

You deserved it 49 219

Second class citizen

By crapped on - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 561

You deserved it 4 261

Rewind time

By supersmashpika - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Hershey

Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 670

You deserved it 9 996

The ending of Lost explained

By Morgan - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I lost my dog. I looked around my neighborhood for hours, and found him under my bed asleep when I got home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 862

You deserved it 30 067

By Anonymous - 03/08/2016 18:01 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my car broke down in the middle of nowhere. I walked about 3 miles to the nearest house to call a tow truck. When I got back to where I left my car, it was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 249

You deserved it 1 256

Hands off parenting

By iloveyoutoomom - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - France

Today, my mom had an appointment with my teacher after class. She never showed. My teacher ended up driving me home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 610

You deserved it 3 581

A tad overbearing

By nehadrihan - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Oceanside

Today, my mom decided to follow me during my driving test. She rear ended me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 808

You deserved it 3 456

Self defence

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 117

You deserved it 2 484

By uninvited - 04/02/2016 15:16 - United States - Boston

Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 261

You deserved it 1 749

Night on the tiles

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Ireland - Gorey

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to sneak out of work early and pay a little visit to the pub. I ended up staggering home, drunkenly making myself a nacho cheese dorito milkshake with the blender, then promptly puked my guts out all over the kitchen table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 983

You deserved it 46 607

Next

Top comments

eviiee_fml 3

Monday 26 July 2010 9:02

this is a fml for the dog not you. poor puppy :(

ActionManly 11

Monday 26 July 2010 9:03

What a CAT-astrophe! Wait, wrong pun...

Comments

hsshae 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:07

wow that sucks. why a puppy?

FFML_314 11

Monday 26 July 2010 9:08

Awhh, that's sad. Too bad it wasn't a squirrel.

Sydnery 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:10

why fyl? you didnt get hit. the dog did.. but poor dog. :/ slap your dad. ;]

eviiee_fml 3

Monday 26 July 2010 9:11

haha thats what i said :)

raineydayes 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:13

Uhhh 26, it's FYL for the OP because seeing a dog get runover is HORRIBLE. That would scar me for life!! And it's not the OP's dad ran over it on purpose. The dad shouldn't be slapped...

FFML_314 11

Monday 26 July 2010 9:17

I'm going to assume that the puppy did not live and if that's the case, it's not **** the puppies life because, there's no life at all. The OP has a right to say FML because, it's not fun to be sick and I don't know many people that would feel good about being in a car that ran over a puppy.

ncvolley123 8

Monday 26 July 2010 9:27

26, u look like an ugly bee-itch flipping off an old man for being to slow on a sidewalk. I hate ur stupid guts.

lickmyjock 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:14

Some dogs are not very smart about being in the road, I'm constantly dodging dogs just chilling in the middle of the road.

nabo4u 0

Monday 26 July 2010 20:23

#32 you look like you're holding the glass that chicks drink out of at the end of a massive bukkake flick.

westsidewhite 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:15

that's a way to cheer ya up, thanks dad...

eviiee_fml 3

Monday 26 July 2010 9:18

haha if only . . barking is close enough :)

rarr 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:19

Op YDI FYL puppy ;(

eviiee_fml 3

Monday 26 July 2010 9:19

my last comment was for 34

the_flirtt 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:20

hah not really :(

eviiee_fml 3

Monday 26 July 2010 9:22

:( better than nothing

the_flirtt 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:24

true

deathrose_fml 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:21

Oh, poor puppy. I hope you feel better.

talksarahh 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:22

wow #26 what r u 12? and fyl OP for seeing a puppy get run over

the_flirtt 0

Monday 26 July 2010 9:26

ya I don't think she's twelve

Jay1D 0

Monday 26 July 2010 10:03

she doesn't look over 14

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Keywords

Animals Gross Poopoo peepee Cats Love Awkward Smells Miscellaneous Embarrassing Painful Health First Dates Christmas Work Social Media Grieving Music Boredom Anniversary Abuse Intimacy Ironic AITA Am I overreacting? Alcohol Transportation Drunk Gun control Parents Kids

The Top

Today, I was upset after my boyfriend and I broke up. My best friend heard and told me she would be right over. Three hours of waiting later, she stumbles in wasted. She had been at the bar, with my ex, making sure he was okay. For me, I just got a list of all the drinks she had that night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 091

You deserved it 2 489

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to mix it up and find a good place outdoors to have fun. After an hour of climbing up a rocky mountainside to a completely isolated clearing, out of the way of any hiking path, he was still so paranoid that he finished within 20 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 460

You deserved it 2 166

The Top

Today, my sister presented me with an "official pet killer" award after yet another goldfish under my care died of unknown causes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 764

You deserved it 10 129

Today, I've been single for so long, I got butterflies when I went on a date. A date with a character in Grand Theft Auto. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 160

You deserved it 2 665

Today, my girlfriend is angry with me. We had an argument on how to properly eat an Oreo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 765

You deserved it 6 083

Today, I was trying to teach my Aunt and Gran to use Google drive to share and upload pictures, when I scrolled past an image of my… yep. I didn't have a mirror when the pic was taken and I was concerned about a sore. Now they just think I'm a whore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 354

You deserved it 565

Today, my mom wants me to get an exorcism because piercings, tattoos, my own car, my own career, moving out of her house, and wanting zero contact with her from now on are "sure signs of demonic possession", maybe even the influence of Lucifer himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 889

You deserved it 137

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 300

You deserved it 4 335