Intimacy: No kinkshaming here

No kinkshaming here

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 04:37 - United States - Northridge

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 098

You deserved it 5 794

Valentine's Day: Love and Maladresse
Discover romantic anecdotes with a touch of awkwardness - because nothing expresses love better than a little discomfort! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Eve - 24/06/2011 10:45 - Ireland

Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 103

You deserved it 10 727

Handjob

By Anonymous - 20/11/2019 18:00

Today, I heard my boyfriend masturbate next to me and then relieves himself on my bed sheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 063

You deserved it 909

Tasty!

By Username - 31/01/2011 15:47

Today, my boyfriend told me the thing that gets him really horny. Apple sauce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 103

You deserved it 5 732

By DallasGal - 14/02/2012 16:31 - United States

Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then remembered it was unlimited pancakes at IHOP. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 829

You deserved it 3 878

Wrong, just wrong

By Anonymous - 02/07/2017 10:00 - China - Chengdu

Today, while licking maple syrup off my wife during foreplay, I probably shouldn't have referred to her breasts as pancakes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 715

You deserved it 7 303

What a wanker

By Anonymous - 01/06/2019 20:01

Today, my boyfriend let it slip that he thinks of my best friend when he masturbates because he like to have the "freedom and variety." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 225

You deserved it 278

By Jess49 - 03/12/2011 02:06 - United States

Today, after telling my boyfriend I was willing to try just about anything to revive our sex life, he confessed to having a swirly fetish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 427

You deserved it 4 845

By PlayboyBunny - 19/02/2011 07:20 - United States

Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 642

You deserved it 8 642

Say yes

By fuckingdonuts - 18/05/2015 02:54 - United States - Edmond

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 074

You deserved it 5 184

Yummy

By lovely - 26/02/2014 18:53 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 132

You deserved it 10 624

Thizzkidsgotgame 7

Sunday 30 September 2012 12:18

Sweet.

toelie 26

Sunday 30 September 2012 12:28

There's just no pleasing some women. Be happy his fantasy features you at all.

Comments

KiddNYC1O 20

Sunday 30 September 2012 19:58

That's actually pretty hot and sounds delicious.

mfelax9556 8

Sunday 30 September 2012 19:58

Never done that?

scuttlebuttz 1

Sunday 30 September 2012 19:59

Fulfill his fantasy on his birthday. He'll love it

DomAce 4

Sunday 30 September 2012 20:21

At least he masturbates to you

DuRpY 5

Sunday 30 September 2012 20:36

Wait one damn minute. This isn't normal? Well, **** me...

sens3sfailing 24

Sunday 30 September 2012 20:59

Well, masturbaiting to syrup, that's just weird, this way it's just kinky...kinda...

BronyVasNormandy 12

Sunday 30 September 2012 21:13

That's not the wierdest fetish out there.

hellya14 0

Sunday 30 September 2012 21:36

But where is the bacon?

mowmowlife 21

Sunday 30 September 2012 22:03

You should be happy. I dare you to beat pancake syrup.

mookiemookie01 24

Sunday 30 September 2012 22:14

Very weird. That would feel gross

Keywords

Awkward Sleep Miscellaneous Television Love Weddings Money Annoying Transportation Relatable Snow Kids Family Pregnancy Mental health Empathy Toxic Food Gamers Argument Cats Animals Valentine's Day Gross Health Homeowners Home improvement Babysitter Drugs Music

The Top

Today, a few hours after me and my husband had sex, he mumbled, "This is why I hate sex," as he left to grab some Tylenol. Apparently, he's so out of shape that basic sex made his muscles too sore to sleep. This is the first time in two weeks we've had sex. I'm always the one that has to ask for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 281

You deserved it 345

Today, my mom accused me of stealing money from her purse. Being totally innocent, I reminded her that the only other person with access to it is her boyfriend. She said she trusts him because she loves him. They've been dating for two months. I've been her daughter for 25 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 269

You deserved it 2 532

The Top

Today, I was stuck crouching over the toilet after a night of drinking. My fiancé walked in, gathered my hair, and held it out of the way. When another wave of nausea hit me and I leaned in, he shoved my face into the bowl and ran out, laughing and yelling, "That'll teach ya!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 937

You deserved it 23 220

Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 757

You deserved it 58 958

Today, I noticed my doctor has freakishly huge hands. This normally wouldn't have bothered me were I not there for a prostate exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 933

You deserved it 547

Today, after my kids told me they'd saved cash to buy me my dream birthday present - chickens - and after I'd worked excitedly to exhaustion for a week building a coop and chicken yard with no offered help from my husband, I'm now sitting in my empty chicken pen after everyone forgot about my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 382

You deserved it 94

Today, my best friend, who is also Godmother to my son, came over to visit for a few hours, as she does every other day. My husband complained to me that she’s over a lot. But he doesn’t see anything wrong with his best friend coming over every weekend and sleepover for 2-3 days straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 587

You deserved it 195

Today, I caught my little sister taking a selfie in the mirror with a fake nose piercing, peace sign, and a duck face. She's 12. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 596

You deserved it 4 246